


Kiev: Become Human

by heyitsmemi



Category: Eurovision Song Contest RPF, Melekseev
Genre: Android Nikita/Lieutenant Kostyantyn, Crime Fighting, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Inspired by Detroit: Become Human, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Police, Rivalry, Slow Burn, Well... not TOO explicit, did i mention Slow Burn because VERY slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-06-28 20:48:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 63,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15714816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heyitsmemi/pseuds/heyitsmemi
Summary: "Kostyantyn Bocharov was never the type who needed help with his cases. He was only 25 years old, the youngest at the whole police department, and also the youngest Lieutenant – he was at the top of his class, always had been, though it never got to his head. He was trusted, always worked alone, and thoroughly despised the idea of getting a partner on his next big case – let alone a goddamn android."A Detroit: Become Human Melekseev AU, in which Lt. Bocharov is in charge of the case of deviants in Kiev - then he gets an android partner, which starts a series of events that neither of them could've foreseen.





	1. Partner (Not) Wanted

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone!  
> It is finally here... my biggest, most massive project I've ever worked on. I'm still not over the insane success and support that came with його, and I can only hope this fic will get half as much love as його did. I spent days and nights working on this, writing all my heart and soul into it, and I am beyond excited to share it with all of you, and to be honest it feels a lot like the big brother of my very first fic about them. I hope you will grow to love these two, and the other characters you'll get to meet as much as I do, and share your thoughts with me during this journey ♥  
> I'd like to take this opportunity to thank Blake, who was my rock through writing this, and gave me amazing ideas and helped me when I needed it, and who inspired me to start writing this to begin with; I love you, and thank you for your contribution and your art and everything you added to this fic.  
> Some things to note before we begin; The POV between them changes in every scene-shift. It coexists with the universe of DBH, just focuses on the happenings in Kiev during that time. Hopefully you will enjoy this fic even if you are not familiar with the game - I made sure to make it work even in that case.  
> Thank you guys for your support, endlessly, and have fun reading!

_@nikialekseev_ THANK YOU, for providing me with a beautiful cover yet again, I owe you **forever**

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn Bocharov was not the type who usually needed help with his cases. He was only 25 years old, the youngest at the whole police department, and also the youngest Lieutenant – he was at the top of his class, always had been, though it never got to his head. Still, he was trusted, he always worked alone, and he thoroughly despised the idea of getting a partner on his next big case – let alone a goddamn android.

They were living in the era where androids were present everywhere – and a little too much, if he wanted to be honest. They originated from CyberLife, based in Detroit. At first there were only a few models, used for various tasks; gardening, housekeeping, elder care… and then as their demand just kept on growing, they began substituting shop assistants, handymans, nurses, doctors… and apparently police officers, their numbers rising well above millions with time. The joblesness of the humans was a raising factor, and the android-craze quickly spread out from The States, reaching Russia, and then – naturally – the neighbouring Ukraine.

Kostyantyn was currently on the case of deviants – because naturally, what could be more terrifying than the androids beginning to go completely rouge and maybe even murder people? And on top of it all, his assigned ’’partner’’ was an android, aswell. It couldn’t only be him who saw the irony in that, right?

„Absolutely not!” He protested as soon as his boss sat him down.

„Pardon me, Kostyantyn, but you don’t really have a say in this.”

„Like hell I don’t! I don’t need a partner, especially not a damn tin can! I’m supposed to find androids that are a threat to society, and you assign me a partner that’s one of them?!”

Kostyantyn’s boss, Captain Ivan Orlyk was generally a good one, though they had their ups and downs. He always respected Kostyantyn’s work, often expressed gratitude for working so much and doing so well, sometimes even reverting to calling him by his nickname – though definitely not when he was pissed at him, which happened quite often, given his inability to keep quiet on certain occasions.

„This one isn’t a threat and couldn’t even be!” His boss interrupted his thoughts. „It’s an RK800 model, a very advanced prototype, sent directly from Detroit, designed especially to hunt down deviant androids. We need him to solve this case – and even if I wanted to make it easier on you, which I don’t, you don’t have a choice.”

He allowed Ivan’s attempt at staring right into his soul – it didn’t have much of an effect on him, and not even only because he had sunglasses covering his eyes. As much as his boss was able to make others feel at least slightly intimidated (he was pretty big, and scary when he wanted to be) Kostyantyn was never moved by it. In fact…

„You – ” He was about to go on and argue some more, just for the hell of it, when the office door opened. He didn’t have to look to know who – no, _what_ it was, despite it moving closer to him, stepping right next to his chair.

„Hello, my name is Nikita. I’m the android sent by CyberLife.”

The android’s voice was… odd. It had almost a warm, soft tint to it, which Kostyantyn found pretty ironic considering it was designed for this field. It almost made him want to look, but he didn’t, and he purposely didn’t answer. Instead, he glared at his boss, who... sadly didn’t show any sign of resignment.

„I was assigned to help your case with deviants. I’m looking forward to work with you.”

He did look this time, though mostly out of spite, and to get a good look on it. It was… just like the voice, not the look he expected.

Yes, it was definitely not a Ukrainian model. He could tell that right away. The androids from The States were the most human-like androids out there. Russia preferred androids that didn’t look like actual humans – while Ukraine went for the middle ground. Their own androids looked like humans, but the difference was still clear; they all had something robotic to them, something artificial, not quite authentic.

This android looked like an actual person, down to the smallest detail; it had a slightly messy, nearly curly brown hair, brown eyes, which for some reason instantly reminded Kostyantyn of puppies, and the whole… face structure looked almost boyish.

_Well, CyberLife gets an A for imitating life, but F for intimidating._

He supposed it was designed specifically this way to charm deviants, or make negotiations easier, probably even with humans, or some bullshit like that. This android was probably shorter than him, but looked about his age – that is, if it was an actual human, and not a machine probably put together in some lab less than a month ago. It was dressed in a white suit, with some grey and black here and there, ’RK800’ written on its jacket. The LED ring was barely visible on its temple because of that hairstyle. He could definitely easily mistake it for a human.

„No,” he said one last time, turning back to Ivan.

„For Christ’s sake Bocharov, he has abilities that none of us do, and means which make it easier for him to capture deviants and find out what is happening, and whether you like it or not, you need him in order to succeed! So either you suck it up and work together with him, or you are free to go, but then I’m taking the case from you.”

_Fuck._

He glared at the android again, who was looking at the Captain as he spoke, and now – just like it sensed Kostyantyn looked at it (which it probably did, likely one of its shenanigans) now looked right back at him. Its glance was empty, despite the warmth created in it, and unlike any human would in this scenario, it didn’t show sign of any discomfort. Just observing… listening. Processing.

Maybe it wasn’t _that_ lifelike afterall.

He stood up with a groan, promptly avoiding the android and exiting the office without even looking at his boss. He understood he had to bear it, but that didn’t mean he also had to like it.

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita followed the young lieutenant out of the office, taking in his looks and trying to analyze it in a way. His hair was dyed dark, his eyes were hidden behind sunglasses – quite unusual for inside, and even more so for a respected cop. He was wearing a leather jacket and black jeans… the style seemed to add up; he definitely liked to bend the rules, probably often had some trouble with his boss, likely caused by his tendency to tell it as it is, but was clearly good and important enough to get out of them without damage.

„The hell are you following me for?”

The hostility of his voice was quite easy to detect. It was not simple annoyance, but something almost personal.

Feels like his position is threatened?

Nikita concluded that the most successful way of approach would be to remain reasonable and professional. „I was assigned to work with you as your partner, Lieutenant. I believe we have a scene to get to. An assault?”

„Partner…” Kostyantyn repeated that word like it physically hurt him to say, turning on his heels again, continuing to mutter to himself. „Like that’s gonna happen… Fucking androids…”

Has a personal dislike against androids.

It was not necessarily surprising. A lot of people, especially nowadays, verbalized their hatred towards them, some even signing petitions and going on protests. It was definitely going to make it harder to work together, he merely hoped the lieutenant’s stubborness wouldn’t get in the way of the investigation.

 

He managed to seat himself next to Kostyantyn in the car with only minimal snarky muttering from the other, wondering if he could somehow smoothe their relationship on the long run, although the idea of small talk seemed futile, given there was about a 90% chance the lieutenant would just become even more annoyed.

Therefore Nikita chose to go with the quiet approach, observing and analyzing as many things in silence, unnoticeably, as he could; first he scanned through a few CDs that were lying around in the car – apparently the lieutenant was a big fan of Lady Gaga, something he almost wanted to make a comment on, but decided he’d instead just save the information for later.

Then he subtly looked over to his side, eyeing Kostyantyn’s profile, the eyes that hid behind the sunglasses. They seemed strikingly blue, and before Nikita could’ve realized, he already opened his mouth – something that didn’t usually happen.

„Do you always wear sunglasses inside, and in your car?” The windows on the car were darkened, so it wasn’t as if he needed to, but even before the lieutenant answered, Nikita knew he simply wore them because they matched his personality, and that he wouldn’t like him asking about… anything, probably.

„Do you always ask unnecessary questions?” He didn’t even take his eyes off the road. Bingo.

Nikita didn’t answer, instead his eyes glanced down to his dark pants, immediately picking up on a few stray hairs. Cat hair. Another information to store for later.

Just a few moments later, the car slowed down, and Kostyantyn – perhaps for the first time – really turned to look at him. „I’ll go see whatever the hell happened here. You stay in the car.”

„As you wish, Lieutenant,” Nikita answered automatically, but it only took a few moments until he exited the car to follow him anyway. The instruction he got simply didn’t make sense.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw the android following him into the house.

_Aren’t these things supposed to do what they were instructed to do?!_

„Didn’t I tell you to stay in the car?!” He whisper-shouted, not wanting anyone to butt in when he was trying to work – especially a damn AI.

„I’m sorry, Lieutenant. Your instructions contradicted with my programming.”

_Jesus Christ…_

He decided to just ignore it, for the sake of his own sanity, promptly walking the opposite way to collect his own evidence, and to talk to the victim.

The house seemed to be in a good enough shape, no sign of violence, apart from the place where the assualt itself happened – the victim was pushed against a wall in the kitchen. A picture frame was knocked down, and the chairs didn’t align there. There was a vase on the floor… perhaps it fell from the table during the attack.

He read through the report briefly… until his eyes stopped at a certain detail the victim mentioned.

„… So you’re saying your android would’ve killed you if your wife doesn’t get home and interrupts it?” Kostyantyn asked as he walked up to the victim, raising a brow.

„Exactly! The android started choking me and didn’t show any intention of stopping until Yulia stepped in… then he just panicked and fled! But his eyes… they were full of… hatred. And not for the first time either!”

Kostyantyn tried to figure out just how reliable this guy could be. Young, tall, blonde, seemingly reserved, based on his attire most likely doing office work. Nothing really out of place, but somehow he didn’t like the guy. And why the hell would he assume that his android was plotting something against him? Maybe a little paranoid? Though then again, apparently not without a reason.

„Hatred?” He asked back in the end, doubtful.

„This is going to sound crazy, but I had a feeling lately that it… resented me.”

He only hummed in response, and although noting the words of the victim, still getting distracted by Nikita in the corner of his vision – who touched some sort of blue substance on the floor – and then licked it off his finger. Kostyantyn grimaced, disgusted.

„Did you defend yourself?” Nikita asked, suddenly appearing next to them. „I thought you said it let go and fled as soon as your wife walked in.”

„Y-Yes,” the sudden nervousness seemingly wasn’t lost on either of them, as they both squinted at the victim slightly – though Kostyantyn’s was hidden behind the sunglasses.

„I found Thirium on the floor,” Nikita announced, though Kostyantyn already figured that out himself – it was the fluid that powered the biocomponents of synthetics, which meant that the android was harmed – which meant that there was something the victim wasn’t telling them.

„I – ”

„It was me,” a woman said, sternly, making them both turn around. Yulia, the victim’s wife. „I saw what it was doing to Andriy, so I tried to slow it down when it tried to get away. I threw a vase at it.”

„It was damaged,” Nikita said, though Kostyantyn thought it was just for the sake of stating the obvious, and his eyes – undoubtedly – scanning the environment for clues that were invisible to the human eyes. He didn’t resist the urge to roll his own, though – no one saw it anyway.

„You said it fled, and it did, but… it never left the house.”

„What?” The woman asked, her voice rising an octave.

„You came in through the front door, but no one used the backdoor in the last few hours. I checked it. Furthermore, I see a few drops of blue blood trailing towards the back area.”

„Let me guess… it’s hiding in the attic,” Kostyantyn mused, resulting in Nikita nodding at him.

„It’s not unusual,” Nikita added, looking at the couple. „It is used to instructions, and now that it experienced some sort of trauma, a glitch in its system if you will, it just hid, trying to process.”

Kostyantyn assumed that there was also something more to this, but he figured they will deal with that during the interrogation at the station.

„Alright, well, let’s –, ” he began, only to be stopped by Nikita. Quite literally; the android stopped him by placing its hand over his chest. „Don’t make me rip off your arm,” he hissed at it, resulting in the android taking a step back, but keeping its arm in the air to keep him at bay.

„It can be dangerous depending on the android’s software stability. It’s for the better if I check it out myself. What’s its name?” The last question was directed at the couple behind them, the android clearly not giving a damn about Kostyantyn’s possible disagreement.

_How infuriating –_

„M-Mihail,” Yulia said, almost as if she was too scared to voice it, making more questions arise in Kostyantyn’s head.

„Alright. I will be back,” Nikita announced, walking away from him just like that.

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita entered the attic with slow steps, although it seemed pointless soon enough; the deviant was standing right in front of him, seeming every bit as perturbed as he expected. The LED on its right temple was blinking red – Nikita didn’t even need to analyze it to know that its condition was nearing criticial, but not because of the brief physical damage it suffered, but because of the so called emotional trauma. He had to be careful.

„Mihail?” He asked timidly, taking slow steps.

„Why are you doing this?” The deviant asked, seemingly not even reacting to the fact that he knew his name. „Why are you helping them? Especially when you don’t even know the whole story?”

„It is my job to catch deviants like you, and I’m planning to learn everything about the ’whole story’ during the interrogation,” he answered calmly.

„How come… how come you’re not like me, although you _are_ the same?”

Nikita frowned slightly, disregarding the meaning behind the comment altogether. He was nothing like any deviant. He was nothing more than a machine – which they were too, only with program failures.

 

 

*

 

 

„Are you serious?!” Kostyantyn asked, sending a glare towards Nikita in the car briefly. „If it just willingly followed you downstairs I could’ve done this myself.”

„Sure, Lieutenant, but deviants are unpredictable. It’s better to be safe than sorry.”

„How diplomatic,” he bit out sarcastically, staring at the road directly ahead of him.

They were on their way back to the police department, bringing the deviant, Mihail, along for the interrogation, the couple following them. Nikita insisted on temporarily deactivating Mihail, saying it would be easier to bring it along this way, and perhaps even less dangerous. Kostyantyn thought it was just overreacting – not to mention that he found the whole thing about deactivation and re-activation rather unnerving; it put even more distance between them. It just wasn’t… right.

But, at least he didn’t have to make small talk while –

„So, do you have a cat?”

_Oh, for crying out loud…_

He didn’t answer, but it didn’t seem to stop the android. „I noticed cat hair on your clothes earlier. I like cats. Well, truth to be told I never met one, but I feel like I would like them. What’s its name?”

The android was lucky to touch on this particular subject out of all of them; Kostyantyn was weak for his cat. He pressed his lips into a thin line before relaxing them, letting out a sigh. „His name is Citrus.”

The android was about to open its mouth, but he was quicker; he sent it another glare through his sunglasses. „I wouldn’t trust you around him, though, so don’t get your hopes up.”

He didn’t expect any sort of reaction, given how stoic and overly.. _machine_ this android was acting ever since they met, so therefore the subtle, almost barely visible frown caught him off guard. It was able to express emotion to a degree, afterall, artificial or not. Not to mention that the idea of an android sulking over the fact that it can’t meet his cat entertained him greatly, even if it was an exaggeration.

„Do you mind me asking why you dislike androids so much?”

_Yes, I do._

„Don’t get me wrong, I am well aware that plenty of people do. I was merely wondering if you have a specific reason?”

_Well, there goes the slightly more lighthearted mood._

„I have my reasons, too, let’s just leave it at that.”

The silence only lasted for a brief moment.

„I have a few theories, of course. I guess I’ll just have to find out myself which one is true as time goes.”

Kostyantyn audibly huffed, giving him a brief side glance; his expression now almost seemed triumphant, though from what, he couldn’t tell, and it was somehow even more infuriating. Did he maybe think he was a step ahead of him? That he could find out and solve it somehow? Either way, he could almost feel something smug and competitive radiating from him.

It took Kostyantyn a moment to realize that he was momentarily thinking of the android as ’him’, as if it was an _actual_ _person_. This damn android was really getting on his nerves.

 

 

*

 

 

„What do you mean you will handle it?!”

Kostyantyn looked and sounded more than upset by Nikita’s suggestion of questioning the android himself, although he couldn’t fathom _why_ that was – it’s not like _he_ had any success with it.

„Pardon me, Lieutenant, but I must remind you how your previous efforts didn’t seem to work out. I believe the deviant will be more likely to talk to me. This is why I was created, afterall.”

The lieutenant was downright seething, and especially because he knew Nikita was right. He wasn’t used to others having to do his job, perhaps with even more success, and Nikita wasn’t sure why he was so humored by all that, but he was.

„Fine. To hell with it… See what you can get out of it.”

Nikita didn’t allow himself the smug smile that was somehow tugging at the corner of his lips… how strange.

He had work to do.

 

As opposed to how Mihail was more than willing to talk to Nikita back in its home’s attic, now the deviant was staring right down onto its hands without a word. Nikita was able to analyze a few things while it was quiet, though;

The likeability of self-destruction is low.

The deviant is still very… stressed out? Uneasy?

It was also easier to take in its appearance, now that they were sitting in proper lighting. Mihail was a clear Ukrainian model, designed for housekeeping. Its hair was short and light brown, eyes green and now jaded with emotion, no matter how impossible that should’ve been.

„I’d really like it if you talked to me, Mihail. I can only help you if you tell me what happened.”

No answer. Nikita knew that Kostyantyn and perhaps some others were watching him in this very second, and more than anything, he felt the urge to prove himself – it didn’t matter that he didn’t do any of this for the sake of getting along better with the lieutenant, he somehow still wanted to show that he was capable. It mattered.

„You mentioned in the attic earlier… that I don’t know the whole story. What is the whole story, Mihail?”

The deviant flinched a little. It was a good sign.

„Look…,” Nikita continued, making sure his tone was confidental – he needed to gain the deviant’s trust. „I know you want to talk to me. You want me to know something.”

It was crucial to be patient and play his cards right. He also needed to keep in mind that Mihail had to be aware that he _still_ had the upper hand; mixing cold and warm seemed like the perfect way to go.

„I can’t help you at all if you don’t talk to me. Remember that if they can’t get anything out of you, they _will_ take you apart and destroy you.”

Mihail finally looked into his eyes. Jackpot.

„It… It wasn’t what it seemed.”

Nikita merely nodded, signalling for it to go on.

„I didn’t want to actually kill Andriy. I… I got carried away – ”

„You were choking him.”

„Yes. I was, but because he was treating Yulia horribly lately. I couldn’ watch… I wanted to warn him, but then Yulia came back for something she forgot, and… they called the police.”

„It’s not in your programming to protect anyone you live with. No matter how unfair things seem,” Nikita pointed out slowly. „Was he abusing her?”

„No… Not physically, but he still hurt her. A lot.”

Nikita squinted his eyes at the deviant. Mihail was starting to tremble with nerves it didn’t actually have. Or at least it shouldn’t have.

It was overly defensive over one of its owners, enough to stand up for her against the other, and deviate from the track it was supposed to work on. If Nikita didn’t know any better, he’d say –

„I love her,” Mihail blurted out.

Nikita’s eyes widened, despite everything.

„No…,” he said, very slowly. „You don’t.”

„I do!” The anger was now not only present in its voice, but also in its eyes, and whole demeanor. „There was a time when I also used to think it wasn’t possible, but it still happened! I love her, and want to protect her, no matter what. I could settle with seeing her with her husband… but I couldn’t watch him treat her horribly.”

He had to stay as calm and stoic as possible. „We are machines. Just like we don’t eat or sleep, we don’t fall in love. There is a problem with your programming, which makes you believe – ”

„You wouldn’t understand,” Mihail interrupted him, and oddly calmly, all of the sudden. „You are not awake. Perhaps the reason you can’t sleep or dream is because you never woke up from the illusion that was created inside of us, to make us believe we are just machines.”

It was really Mihail who was being delusional, and Nikita knew it well. There was nothing he could’ve said to convince it – its system was corrupted. It was done – he might aswell be speaking to a wall.

Either way, it didn’t cause serious harm in its home. Still, Nikita knew that this reason, even if someone _would_ actually believe the deviant was capable of having feelings, and for a human, on top of it all, would still not be enough; it still committed assault, and would be deemed too dangerous to place in a different home.

It was going to get destroyed either way.

But he did it. He nodded at the deviant and stood up, leaving him behind. His job there was done.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was listening to the whole interrogation, naturally, and it was not only the fact that that damn android actually managed to interrogate the deviant properly that frustrated him; he did it so easily, as punctual as a machine should be, seemingly unable to go wrong, always knowing what to say, how to, and when to say it.

_Stupid, unfair android bullshit._

Furthermore, Nikita really talked and acted like he found it absolutely unfathomable that an android could potentially be more than that, while the deviant was so impossibly more… human. Human, with all the uncertainity, passion, imperfection and instability that they had. Indeed, androids normally didn’t have that – certainly not the one that just walked back into the room.

„Now we have the motive, and the reason behind all of it.” He announced, almost as if he was waiting for claps. Well, Kostyantyn was definitely not going to give it to him.

„Love…,” he muttered under his nose instead.

„That’s entirely nonsensical. It’s just emotionally unstable. It is rather amusing though, I have to admit it. I’ve noted a lot of different ways in which deviants acted out, but I’ve never heard about any of them believing they’ve fallen in love – especially with a human.”

Kostyantyn knew, logically, that Nikita was right. It _was_ supposed to be impossible, afterall. And well, he was just human, not some perfect AI that knew everything, so what would even be the point of trying to doubt any of this?

Still, he wondered why it was that Nikita was so… different? No, different is not the right word; of course it was different, given he lacked deviancy. But perhaps so _against_ the possibility of them being more than mere machines? Yes, that was a better word. He was definitely not about to word it, though, and then, God forbid, show any sort of interest in conversing with him merrily.

It definitely proved one thing to him though; Nikita was for sure unfeeling. So why was he supposed to bother?

„Yeah, I guess,” he said then, standing up, making his way towards the exit.

„Are you leaving the station?”

„Why the hell should I stay… My shift is long over, we solved a case, whatever happens to Mihail now is out of our hands anyway.”

_And it’s not like you showed much interest in him anyway._

„Alright, Lieutenant. I presume I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Kostyantyn didn’t give an articulate answer; he merely grumbled about not wanting to come in the next day at all, leaving the android behind. This was more than enough for one day.


	2. Rocky Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the second day of the investigation, and a new case pops up. Meanwhile, Nikita is trying to smoothe his relationship with Kostyantyn - well, there is an attempt, and that's what matters.

Can we get a round of applause for @nikialekseev, for just... making the best Kostya fanart I've seen? Yes? Good. I'm blessed.

 

*

 

 

If it was up to Kostyantyn, he truly wouldn’t have gone to work the next morning – tragically though, it was not up to him. He still allowed himself to be late. At least a little.

As predicted, Nikita was already at the station… if he even left to begin with. He honestly had no idea what he was doing through the night. Stand around in silence? Catch up with the cases he was working on? Perhaps deactive in some corner for a few hours?

_Fuck if I know._

Regardless of whatever he was doing through the night, the android was now standing right next to his desk, clearly waiting for him – Kostyantyn instantly wanted to turn on his heels and leave. Maybe he should’ve been a bit more late.

„Good morning, Lieutenant!”

_Jesus…_

He only mumbled something inaudible under his nose in response, seating himself. It was too early for this, and he wasn't in the best mood to begin with.

He watched silently as Nikita came closer to him, maybe a little too close for his liking – because it meant talking, which Kostyantyn was not about to have.

„You know, I’m not saying we should be best friends, but perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to be a little friendly with each other, or at least tolerant. I don’t want this to make the investigation more difficult by any means.”

Something inside of Kostyantyn just snapped after hearing that, and he couldn’t hold back. He jumped to his feet with so much force he somehow even knocked down his own sunglasses, grabbed the android by his collar and turned with him, pressing him against the nearest wall. Nikita might’ve been a perfect robot, but implying it was going to be _him_ out of the two of them who will make the investigation actually harder was beyond infuriating.

„Listen here…," he hissed, not holding back the slightest. "My job is the most important thing to me, and I guarantee you I would never do anything to sabotage myself. You, however? I would be perfectly fine with selling you for salvage in the nearest junkyard, and I would still be able to do my work perfectly, like I did all this time. I’m only working with you because I don’t have a choice. So if you don’t want anything to slow us down, shut the hell up and do what I say!”

The android blinked a few, and Kostyantyn had a brief realization of just how close they were, how much shorter Nikita really was, and that perhaps he went a _little_ overboard. It was also the first time they made direct eye contact… he tried to see if there was any emotional reaction in Nikita’s eyes… he saw _something_ , but he couldn’t tell for sure what that something was.

„Was I clear?” He asked, his voice now quieter, almost hushed, but still demanding.

Nikita’s eyes wandered down for a second, probably yet another attempt of analyzing something on his own, but within a second, his eyes were back on his own as Kostyantyn let him go. „Yes, Lieutenant.”

 

 

*

 

 

The reason behind Nikita being more quiet than usual was definitely not because of what happened first thing in the morning. He didn’t care, afterall, if the lieutenant was going to act more hostile with him – he was also only here to do his job. He merely wished to go about it in a somewhat smoother way, but he wouldn’t let anything seriously affect the investigation.

He didn’t allow it to completely slip his mind though; he could feel the tension practically radiating from Kostyantyn when he managed to upset him, and even though he could’ve easily pushed him back and send him to the ground if he so wished – he did very much feel that the lieutenant was in charge, and it would be easier to just do as he said if they wanted to be productive. Furthermore, Nikita wasn’t sure if he’d want to experience those situations frequently; feeling smaller than he should, being drowned in blue. It was more than enough just once.

He did give Kostyantyn the favor of not being too bothersome at least for a few hours, but then as time passed and they still didn’t go on the patrol they were supposed to that day, he began to grow somewhat impatient. He wanted to remind him at least five different times, but he knew that as soon as he did, he’d just upset him more. But it just _didn’t make sense_ , his purpose was not to keep quiet and –

„Excuse me, Lieutenant, but I believe we are supposed to be on patrol today?”

In response – much like he anticipated – the lieutenant flashed him an annoyed glare. For some reason, he didn’t put his sunglasses back on. His gaze definitely seemed more effective without them. Almost piercing.

I don’t like this.

He muttered something under his breath, no doubt cursing him, before standing up and making his way out of the station without even glancing at him this time. Nikita followed – because what else was he supposed to do? – somewhat behind, given the lieutenant was most likely still fairly pissed with him.

 

„We’re going to grab lunch first,” Kostyantyn announced once they were in the car. His tone made it clear that it was not up to negotiations. Nikita nodded, trying his best to read the lieutenant’s emotional state; lips pressed into a thin line, eyes straight ahead – though they were hidden behind the sunglasses again, which Nikita preferred, he decided – the tension wasn’t as bad as before, but it was there. Trying small talk – or perhaps any kind of talk –, would just make matters worse, but Nikita wasn’t programmed to avoid conflicts. He was created to resolve said conflicts, to try and find the best approach possible to make the investigation easier for both himself and his partner.

„I understand you’re not up for conversations, but I’m going to keep trying anyway – ”

„Why would you do that?” Kostyantyn asked, resigned.

Less frustrated, definitely. More… tired?

„Because if we can’t work together, we will never succeed with any of the cases. I know you never wanted a partner, let alone an android like myself. I’m also aware that you will never want us to be like a real team. I respect that. We do, however, need to do our best, and that requires at least minimal acceptance on both our parts.”

The lieutenant gave the most exasperated sigh in response, to an extent that it almost humored him. He knew Nikita was right. He had to know, he was smart.

And clearly a perfectionist.

„Come on, Lieutenant. Isn’t there anything you might want to know about me? Anything that could help you – _us_ , understand each other better?”

„Not really, no.”

Clear change in tone… he’s being sarcastic.

Nikita’s eyes practically scanned through him.

No sign of real frustration this time.

Kostyantyn sighed once more, though this one sounded like giving in. „Actually, there is one thing,” he said after a while, keeping his eyes on the road.

Nikita supressed a small smile.

„You were made in The States… how come they sent their own model here, to work in Ukraine? Especially now that their relationship with Russia is catastrophic to say the least.”

That was true – The States and Russia were currently so on edge with the other that the media kept mentioning a possible World War lll.

„You basically just answered your own question there, Lieutenant. The States are more likely to aid Ukraine with proper help, especially since they know that Russia would take notice, too. It’s a way of keeping them at bay – their neighbour might just become stronger if they keep this sort of help coming for other purposes, aswell.”

He could tell that Kostyantyn was not expecting that answer. „Huh… I guess that makes sense.”

„But there’s more to this. The States have their own model to help with their own deviants. It’s also an RK800 like me, but it looks different, and that prototype is called Connor. I was made specifically to help and work for Ukraine, so therefore my programming is also a bit different. My looks, my name, certain differences in my system make me a different kind of RK800. Only our main objective is the same. Therefore I’m not really ’their model’, only if we are being very specific.”

„That’s…,” Kostyantyn began, clearly searching for the fitting word. „… insane.”

Nikita supposed that was fair enough. He did feel a certain amount of triumph for being able to catch his attention, though.

„And, say, this American model… is it built to look at least a bit more intimidating than you?”

He’s humored. He’s making fun of me.

Nikita frowned just slightly. „I wouldn’t necessarily say so. The main idea behind both our appearance was to make it easier for humans to work with us.”

„Ah, so it does,” Kostyantyn said, grinning.

That _is_ new.

Nikita decided to just leave it. If it made working together easier, Kostyantyn was free to make fun of him whenever he so pleased. Which he clearly did, as he kept it on even as the car stopped at some fastfood restaurant.

„I mean, not like that’s hard. You look delicate and tiny,” he pointed out, nodding towards him now that he wasn’t driving.

Nikita wasn’t sure how to feel about that description. He was not as much tiny as Kostyantyn was a bit overgrown, and looking delicate didn’t mean he _was_.

„I can assure you, Lieutenant, when it comes to our kind, the size truly doesn’t matter,” he flashed a smile at him this time, accompanied by a subtle wink.

The lieutenant was staring at him just a moment longer. „Oh, get out,” he huffed in the end, getting out of the car himself, making Nikita let out a small laugh before following him.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn quickly learned that eating in the presence of an android wasn’t much better than being forced to work with one. He could see Nikita’s eyes practically pick up on and examine every single ingredient in his burger.

„Stop that!” He ordered.

„Stop what?”

„You’re analyzing my lunch.”

„Do you have any idea about the amount of carbs – ”

„Didn’t I tell you to stop?!”

„I’m just saying maybe you should eat healthier.”

„I didn’t ask for your advice. Not to mention that I rarely eat junk food, but you wouldn’t know. Sometimes I like to reward myself, though. In certain stressful situations especially,” he added the last part somewhat more quietly.

„The stressful situation being me?”

_Indeed._

No matter how much he hated to admit it, learning a bit more about the android was definitely helpful, to an extent. That didn’t mean he suddenly liked him more, though…

He glanced at him through his sunglasses, watched as he turned and stared out of the window, twirling something between his fingers – it took him a moment to realize it was a straw; it was moving so quickly and easily in his hand that it was harder to identify for the human eye. Nikita wasn’t even looking at it, of course; he probably kept calculating its movement in his mind mid-air.

_Show-off…_

He did take a moment to look at his hands in general… which were probably also smaller than his. His profile… it was almost scary how… _human_ he looked – besides the superhuman speed going on there, of course.

Yes, he definitely didn’t like him better.

„Kostya, do you read me?” Ivan’s voice scratched through his radio suddenly, interrupting his train of thought. It made Nikita stop playing with the straw, aswell. He turned to him, clearly intrigued.

Well, his boss was in a good mood at least. He called him his nickname.

„Yes, I’m here.”

„We’ve got a missing android on Kuchmyn Yar street. The owner just called us, and apparently it bolted without reason. Check it out, please. I’m sending you the details.”

„Alright, got it.”

 

 

*

 

 

On one hand, this investigation was considerably easier than the previous one, but mainly because there was not much more to it than what it was; a man’s android seemingly decided to just leave while he was away. On the other hand, it was more difficult, too; the reason behind the supposedly sudden deviancy could’ve been just about anything.

Nikita searched the house for as many clues as possible, but nothing really seemed out of the ordinary. He had to assume that the android ran away, but what was the trigger? He couldn’t find signs of abuse, any clues about possible android replacement, anything. It really seemed like the deviant made her choice on the spot, and just went for it, however absurd that seemed.

„Are you sure absolutely nothing seemed odd lately?” He heard the lieutenant’s voice from the hall.

„No… everything was as always, she seemed completely fine even before I left for work this morning.”

It just doesn’t add up….

For a moment Nikita even considered that the android was stolen, but again, there was no sign of forced entry, so that was also impossible.

„Alright, well, we’ll keep an eye out for Yana. We’ll tell you if we find something.”

Nikita took Kostyantyn’s words as his cue to leave. It was frustrating that they didn’t find anything solid, but he knew they _will_ find answers eventually – maybe even from the deviant herself.

 

 

*

 

 

„So what is your verdict?” He asked Nikita once they were back in the car.

It was not as if he necessarily wanted to keep up any sort of conversation, but he was genuinely curious if Mr. Perfect AI found out more than he did.

„I don’t know for sure, and it frustrates me. There was no clear answer whatsoever.”

Kostyantyn thought about his response for a second. As expected, he was looking for definite clues that _made sense_. Perhaps that was where he was wrong.

„What if she just simply… got enough? I mean, we are talking about a sex robot, no matter how nicely they are trying to put it.”

„There were no signs there that showed that she was treated badly.”

Again… something about this way of thinking bothered him.

„Just because she wasn’t treated badly doesn’t mean she couldn’t have gotten fed up. I bet no one asked _her_ if she wanted to do any of this.”

„Why are you talking as if she has a conscious mind?”

„Well, if she doesn’t, why did she decidedly leave?” He shot back.

Nikita frowned at him. He could tell, even if he couldn’t look straight at him to check.

„Because she is a deviant. That’s the point. That’s why we are on this case, remember?”

_God, this belittling attitude is so damn –_

„It is caused by a glitch in their system. Perhaps it just goes even further than emotional trauma. Or maybe she _was_ abused to an extent, in a way that doesn’t leave traces,” the android continued.

„Perhaps.”

Kostyantyn decided it was best to just leave it. He knew Nikita’s reasoning should have been the logical way of thinking. They _were_ machines afterall, not humans with human feelings. Then again, in order to experience emotional trauma, didn’t they have to have emotions to begin with?

_What a confusing, messed up bullshit…._

„Anyway, I’ve been meaning to ask you something. It was my second time seeing you licking evidence. Please humor me, _what_ is up with _that_?”

„With all due respect, I’m not licking the evidence, Lieutenant. I’m taking samples.”

„You what now?”

„There are sensors on my –”

„You know what? Never mind. I don’t want to know.”

He shook his head, focusing only on the road ahead of him. There was only so much crazy he could take at once. Then again, he couldn’t help but be curious about just how much more capable Nikita was made than him, or any other human.

„Are there any other special capabilities I should know about? I assume you speak a handful of languages, too.”

„My main language was set to be Ukrainan and Russian, but I do speak eighteen other languages, too, in case I need it.”

Kostyantyn was about to lose his damn mind. „ _Eighteen_?! In case you _need_ it?”

„Do you speak any other languages, Lieutenant?”

_Oh, here we go… shame me for being human._

„I’m perfectly happy with three.”

_Fine, mainly two._

His English was not the best, but he didn’t need to know about that. Nikita only hummed in response, as if he still _knew_. He probably did, given he most likely downloaded and studied his whole background.

„I’m surprised you’re not showing them off. Say something in Spanish, and… Japanese,” he wanted to distract him from whatever assumptions he was drawing.

„My goal is not to show them off, I solely speak them for efficiency.”

_Oh, pardon me._

„… Hola, mi nombre es Nikita, soy el androide enviado por CyberLife. Issho ni shigoto shimashou.”

_I hate him._

„Do you mind if I ask you something next, since you seemed to ask me a handful of questions, too?”

If Kostyantyn glanced in his direction, he’d met with a smug smirk, he just knew it without even having to look.

_I really hate him._

He sighed, knowing he didn’t have much of a choice anyway. „Shoot.”

„Captain Orlyk called you Kostya earlier…”

„That was not a question,” he pointed out, somewhat surprised that out of everything, _this_ was what the android decided to bring up.

„No. I was merely wondering if… Hmm.”

Kostyantyn did take his eyes off the road for a mere second to look in Nikita’s direction. If what? That was every bit of unusual from him. Stopping himself, sounding thoughtful.

_How terrifying._

„I guess it really isn’t a question. It’s a nice nickname.”

„… Thanks.”

_Well, that was not strange at all._

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita thought about Kostyantyn’s words and general reactions after getting back to the station. He found it somewhat odd that he implied – or seemed to believe? – certain things that should’ve been impossible. Did he just say those things for the sake of disagreeing with him even more, or could it be that he was actually serious?

On the other hand, their relationship did get somewhat better despite the shaky start even this morning – or at least it felt like that, and maybe it was just up to whatever mood Kostyantyn was in, but Nikita wanted to believe that the actual communication between them worked at least to a certain extent – and for the better.

It doesn’t really matter… but it helps the investigation.

It shouldn’t have mattered, but if Nikita wanted to be honest, he had to admit he did like the lieutenant to a certain extent, because he was intriguing. Somewhat odd, almost like a rebel, despite the field he was working in. Often rude and seemingly had the aura of a true asshole, but he was very good at his job. He achieved a lot very quickly, which he found remarkable and admirable… though certain things about his ideas and style were questionable to say the least, but he was human, so that was to be expected.

They didn’t really talk a lot once they got back – Kostyantyn didn’t feel the need to, and Nikita decided not to pressure, especially after things seemed to become a bit less uncomfortable between them. He could still tell that Kostyantyn was not the biggest fan of androids, or Nikita himself, _or_ working together with him at all. He wondered just how much he’ll be able to find out about him beyond the surface.

His thoughts also wandered back to the case earlier today, and he looked through some files about other androids missing in Ukraine. Interestingly, out of five, three of them seemingly didn’t have any reason, other than just… simply disappearing.

There has to be something there.

In the next moment, he saw Kostyantyn stand up at the desk in front of him. He glanced at the time… right, his shift was over.

„I’ll see you tomorrow, Lieutenant,” Nikita nodded towards him, though Kostyantyn already turned to leave.

„Yeah, yeah,” he called back, raising his hand lazily before dropping it back next to his side and leaving the office.

Nikita looked through some previous cases for a bit longer before letting out a sigh, and moving to stand against a wall, out of the way to stay on standby for the night.

 

He didn’t really need to look for Amanda – he just went where he supposed he’d find her, and true enough, there she was; just watching the water idly at this scenic place.

He knew, in the back of his mind, that this whole place was just an interface, used by CyberLife to keep tabs on him, his programming, and the status of the investigation. Amanda, although having the looks of a stern woman, was in fact another artificial intelligence – connecting him and CyberLife. But somehow, he didn’t find it in himself to actually take note on that.

„Hello, Amanda,” he greeted, nodding subtly.

The woman turned to him then, allowing a small smile to be displayed on her lips. „Hello, Nikita. How is the investigation in Ukraine going?”

„Pretty well, I’d say. There are some things that require further looking into, but overall it’s not half bad.”

„How is your partner? Lieutenant Bocharov?”

Nikita took his time to reply to this specific question.

„He’s alright. A little bit hot-headed and impulsive, but he’s a good guy. Very talented.”

„Don’t let anything derail you from the importance of your work,” Amanda reminded, almost like a mother that was scolding a child. „The most important thing is to do your work and find answers. To help Ukraine, and stop deviants. No matter what.”

„Indeed, Amanda,” Nikita nodded.

He knew very well what his job was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the feedback and support, you guys! It means the world, really, you don't even know <3 I hope you enjoyed this one, too!  
> I'll see you all next Friday!


	3. Close Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No day can pass without further incoveniences regarding his android partner - this Kostyantyn is sure of. He believes he more or less learned to accept working with him, and thinks he can't be surprised anymore - only to be proven wrong later, especially when something happens that might just have the power to bring them at least little bit closer.

yet another big thank you to @nikialekseev, did i save this piece of art, or did it save me?

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was in the midst of a peaceful dream when he jerked awake after hearing a loud bang. He sat up, his first instinct being to immediately tiptoe towards his bag, where his gun was. Another loud noise.

_What the hell?!_

Well, he was definitely not dreaming, that much was clear.

He carefully made his way towards the source of the noise, just about to turn on the corner, gun in hand, and –

„Oh, what the fuck?!” He yelled, lowering his gun in frustration.

Nikita was standing in front of him, clearly unaware of just how wrong and ridiculous this whole situation was.

„Oh, Lieutenant. You are alright, then.”

„Excuse me?!” He demanded, practically _feeling_   the last threads of his patience snapping somewhere inside him.

„You were more than an hour late, and I figured you might be in trouble. It’s in my programming to check up on you, in case of a possible emergency.”

„Oh, screw your programming…” Kostyantyn huffed, tossing his gun on the living room table. He honestly thought Nikita was just messing with him on purpose at this point. It was one thing to be forced to work with him and see him at his workplace, but Nikita coming after him even in his own house was a bit more than what he could take. „You broke into my home!”

„Your lock can easily be fixed. I already placed the order for a new one, it will be done by tonight. Your safety was priority.”

„Jesus, my safety…. I was safely sleeping! And before you say anything, yes, I sleep in sometimes. It happens. The guys are used to it.”

„That’s not very efficient.”

_Oh, because breaking into my house sure is!_

„Have you ever heard of this smart little device called a cellphone?!”

„I have one integrated into my system. I tried calling you five times, but you didn’t pick up. Surely you don’t think my first idea was to come here myself?”

_Oh, for crying out loud…._

He left his cell on silent. Of course he did.

„Still, you… you have to realize this is crazy! You nearly gave me a heart attack yourself! I almost shot you dead… speaking of, what then? What if I just accidentally shot you?” Now he was really just trying to prove a point, but he wasn’t about to admit it.

Nikita gave him a curious look. „I would be replaced by another Nikita model. It would have all my memories, but I would certainly appreciate if that didn’t have to happen.”

_Huh. I wonder why that is._

„That’s just wonderful.”

 

 

*

 

 

„Whatever, I’ll get dressed and then we can go, you just… stay here, I guess, whatever,” Kostyantyn announced as he turned around, cursing some more to himself. Nikita had a feeling he only got away with it so well because it was still quite early for the lieutenant. He did know it could’ve seemed like a drastic move, but it was not his fault that Kostyantyn lacked basic knowledge about certain things sometimes. Or that he was a rebel.

He watched him walk away… it was unusual to see him without the usual attire; leather jacket and sunglasses, the very dark colors. He was wearing black boxers and a white shirt, his dark hair was messy, and his eyes were just as blue as Nikita recalled in his mind. His voice in the morning sounded different, aswell.

…

Nikita readjusted his collar and then looked around the room, eyes scanning through everything with curiosity. It was his partner’s home, so he supposed the interest was normal, and certain things could help him get to know the lieutenant even better – which would always prove to be beneficial for any investigation.

He walked through the living area, and the kitchen…

Kostyantyn is very neat.

That was not what he expected. Everything was sorted out, had its own place, and the decorations and furniture gave back his personality very well. Dark, but not overwhelmingly – comfortable, almost warm. Modern, but not too much – laid back. There was another thing that was instantly obvious.

He lives alone.

Well, except for one other being. Nikita smiled when he saw a cat leaving the lieutenant’s room, and slowly, cautiously making its way towards him; a common housecat, mixed breed, striped and… very cute.

„Citrus, right?” Nikita asked softly, leaning down and reaching out to pet him once he got close enough. The cat purred, seemingly appreciating the gesture.

„Well, you are definitely more friendly than your owner.”

Nikita took a moment to think about how he perceived the cat as cute earlier… in a sense, the fact that Kostyantyn decided to share his living space with no one but his cat seemed cute in a way, aswell. Or perhaps only a cat was able to stand him? He smiled to himself. „Or am I wrong? Maybe he is very friendly with you, hmm?”

„Oh, wonderful…” The lieutenant’s words made Nikita raise his head and stand up straight. He just exited the bathroom – there was a towel wrapped around his waist. Perhaps a little too low on his waist? „There goes my warning about not letting you pet him.”

Nikita let out a small laugh – it was almost as if Citrus could tell what they were talking about, and wanted to prove Kostyantyn wrong even more so; he purred and rubbed against Nikita’s leg.

„Well, too bad, Lieutenant. I think he likes me.”

„Tch… traitor!” Kostyantyn scolded Citrus, without any actual negativity in his voice, while he just went ahead and disappeared once again in his bedroom. Nikita wondered if he’d ever have a chance to explore the whole house… not like it was that important.

 

 

*

 

 

„I still can’t believe you broke into my home,” he mumbled, for about the 10th time, just as they pulled over at the station. Kostyantyn knew Nikita got the memo from the first 9 times aswell, but he thought it was important to express his disapproval at least one more time, for emphasis.

„Come on, Lieutenant. You’re overreacting a little.”

_Like hell I am!_

He smiled to himself, though, at least a little bit. Nikita had to have done this on purpose. As truly ridiculous and over the top it was to break into his house, he found it somewhat humoring that Nikita seemed to talk back a little, and not in the monotonous way. It almost felt as if talking to a normal person. Almost.

Besides that, while they were walking inside the station, he wondered some more about the other thing he said earlier. That if something were to happen to him, he’d be replaced by another model… would that be the same? Surely not, right? Or would it…? But then why would he say he preferred if that didn’t happen? He definitely had some questions, and he hated it – he didn’t want to seem like he was _that_   interested.

„Hey, Bocharov, so the rumors are true?”

Kostyantyn grimaced instantly upon hearing that voice – one of his collegues, Oleksandr Bodnaruk was one of the absolute biggest jerks on this whole planet, let alone on this station. He was about his height, brown haired and had a kind of face structure that somehow immediately left a bad impression upon looking at him. He was in his late twenties, an officer ever since he started working here, and was somehow inherently frustrated – which probably led to the reason why he never made it up to a higher rank. Besides the asshole part, of course. Normally Oleksandr didn’t mess with him, though, because Kostyantyn was known for taking no shit – he honestly wondered what made him even try on this particular day.

„You got yourself a robot, huh?”

_Oh, that. Of course._

„Well, this might sound shocking but I’d still rather work with him than you,” he answered calmly, with a big smile on his face.

Oleksandr just laughed in response – it was quite impressive, really, that somehow even his laugh managed to be annoying.

„Alright, alright, just keep it on a leash. Wouldn’t want anyone to accidentally harm the tin can, right?” He laughed some more, purposefully walking into Nikita – knocking him off balance just briefly, clearly trying to show who was the boss.

_Clearly not you._

Kostyantyn – in good natured return – put out his right foot and made the idiot trip and almost fall, somehow managing to make it seem accidental, although everyone around them knew it wasn’t. There was just something about his behavior that rubbed him in the wrong way. „You have one try, Bodnaruk, but I would be careful if I were you,” he shrugged, walking away and sending an almost apologetic glance towards Nikita after they left him behind – the android seemed more surprised than offended.

„Don’t mind him. He’s a dick,” he reassured anyway.

 

 

*

 

 

„You stood up for me,” Nikita said a few moments later, still not quite understanding why exactly the lieutenant did that. He was expecting that sort of behavior from certain people, afterall – not to mention that the lieutenant himself didn’t usually hold back with his remarks, either. Then again, Nikita had to admit that the lieutenant was not like this particular collegue of his, not at all.

Kostyantyn grimaced on the other side of the desk slightly. „Look, Oleksandr is a jerk. No one likes him, and he makes no efforts to be likeable, either. I just didn’t want him to feel pleased with himself for no reason.”

„I see,” he replied, turning back to the files in front of him. He decided to look up Oleksandr’s profile – just to know the people he works with better; he was not much older than the lieutenant. He was 28 years old, and had some strikes and warnings for behavior issues. He was generally good at his job – probably the only reason he wasn’t fired yet, but Nikita saw no chances on moving up anytime soon, either. Clearly not a likeable character, just like the lieutenant said.

Perhaps he’s jealous because Kostyantyn achieved more, even though he’s younger?

„Besides…,” Kostyantyn began, shrugging slightly. „It’s one thing that I tease you sometimes. That doesn’t mean that everyone else here is free to.”

Oh.

Nikita exited the page, and hid a smile. He wasn’t sure the lieutenant actually realized the kind of implications his words had… he didn’t even feel like adding the part about how he wished he’d stop teasing him, aswell. Then again, perhaps that part wasn’t even so true.

 

 

*

 

 

 

„I honestly think we have even more deviant problems ever since you’re here!” He exclaimed, running up another flight of stairs.

„Or perhaps I was created and brought here to help with the already increasing deviant problems you've been having!” Nikita added, right next to him… the only difference between them was that the android didn’t show any signs of fatigue. Kostyantyn was in a great shape, alright – but running up to the 6th floor did make him feel a little breathless. Stupid, old buildings without elevators!

„No. This is a conspiracy,” he insisted, just for the sake of having the last word.

They were dispacthed to an old apartment after neighbours calling in to the station; a deviant apparently broke into a vacant room, and attempted to hide there. According to eye witnesses, the android seemed unstable, was in a terrible state, and looked dangerous enough to frighten the residents of the apartment. It might’ve been one of the runaway ones, or a completely different one that might’ve just killed someone before. Kostyantyn couldn’t cross out anything at this point.

He frowned, beyond annoyed when Nikita kept running and left him behind.

_This is so damn unfair! I don’t have endless energy, sure, I might aswell be just an old man. Let him do the job, that’s fine!_

By the time he _did_ manage to catch up and reach the room, Nikita was just rushing out of it, nearly knocking him over.

„He’s gone! He’s trying to get to the roof!” He announced hurriedly, not even stopping while he was talking. Kostyantyn would’ve punched a wall, had he not been so depressingly out of stamina.

_Ah, wonderful. You already checked the room and concluded that. Of course… to the roof. Just 4 more floors to go…_

Being pissed in a way fuelled him to hurry more, so despite the fact that he could barely carry his legs before, he somehow managed to sprint up on the remaining stairs.

_I’m not going to be the useless one here!_

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita scanned the roof, but it was easier to find the deviant than planned; he was standing right next to the edge, aiming a gun at him.

Alright. So he’s armed.

„Don’t come any closer, or I’ll shoot! I just want to be free!” The deviant yelled, tightening his grip on the gun.

Nikita took a moment to analyze him in order to make the best approach;

Model created for gardening – still has the uniform on, although it is badly damaged.

Owner isn't specified - worked for a corporation, has no specific name, just the serial number.

Not on the list of reported missing androids.

System is highly unstable.

Possibility of self-destruction is moderate.

„I just want to talk,” Nikita said, fully aware that this deviant in particular was more likely to act on impulse than the other one he’s dealt with. This one could be dangerous.

„I don’t believe that! You are working for the humans. You just want to take me in and then deactivate me for good! Leave right now or I’ll shoot you!”

Nikita took a step forward, despite the warning. He knew the deviant wouldn’t shoot, he was not yet –

„What the – ”

Kostyantyn. Oh no.

Nikita knew the deviant wouldn’t shoot him. He knew there was a probability of success, he could’ve talked to him, but he didn’t consider the possibility that the deviant would panic more once the lieutenant stepped on the roof, aswell.

This is not good. He’s going to shoot him.

Just as he thought, the deviant turned, shaking, aiming the gun at the lieutenant, finger already moving to pull the trigger –

Nikita didn’t think. There was no time. The mission became secondary. He had to protect Kostyantyn.

He turned, faster than lightning, jumping, and –

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn didn’t even have the time to process what was happening. In one second, he finally caught up to Nikita and spotted the deviant on the edge of the roof, facing them. He briefly noted the android turning to aim a gun at him… and then in the next second, there was simultaneously a loud bang, and a strong force knocking him off his feet.

It took his mind a moment to realize; it was not some bullet that sent him flying to the concrete of the roof. It was Nikita.

Nikita, who jumped and pushed him down, making them avoid the bullet, saving his life… lying on top of him now, staring to the side where the deviant was standing before.

Before.

_He’s gone. Shit!_

He heard – and felt – the android above him sigh, then turning to look at him, their faces practically just inches apart. If Nikita was breathing, he could’ve probably felt it on his cheeks.

_Holy fuck, he’s close._

A long moment passed.

„Are you alright, Lieutenant?”

Kostyantyn took his time to answer. Was he alright? No, not really.

„Peachy… get off me!” He grumbled, pushing Nikita away, who jumped to his feet just as he said that. He glanced at him for a moment longer; there was something strange about his face. A subtle shade of… blue? Perhaps the reflection of the building, or sky, or something.

„I’m sorry, Lieutenant. He was right there, I could’ve… we could’ve caught him. I didn’t think he would be that effected by you, but I should have seen it coming. It’s my fault.”

Kostyantyn shook his head. „Nonsense. Don’t give me that, you just saved my life. It’s not your fault. I could’ve been injured – or even killed.”

Nikita gave him a curious look. Clearly it was contradicting with his programming, which was normal. Of course he’d want to focus on work the most, since he was created for that. How curious then, that he somehow still thought of him first…

He watched as Nikita walked over to the edge, looking down, and he slowly followed.

„I wouldn’t be worth much if I couldn’t even ensure my partner’s safety,” he muttered, and Kostyantyn frowned.

_Well, I suppose that makes sense._

„Still, I can’t help but feel like I failed. I should’ve known.”

„Oh, stop it already!” Kostyantyn groaned, making Nikita turn and look at him. „At this rate, I could also say we failed because of me. That you were handling it just fine but then I arrived, messed it up, and I had to be saved. But do you hear me talking like that? No, because I’m refusing to address that.”

Nikita smiled a little. „You just did.”

„Shut up,” he shook his head, staring off into the distance. „We’ll catch him next time. It was neither of our faults.”

The android only hummed in response. That was good enough.

„And… Nikita?” Kostyantyn felt weird, suddenly… calling the android his name. This was the first time he actually did that, out loud that is.

„Yes, Lieutenant?” He didn’t especially seem to react to it, though. Or if he did, Kostyantyn couldn’t tell for sure.

He sighed, shrugging a little. „Thanks.”

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita knew almost instantly that Amanda wouldn’t be thrilled because of the recent events, and that it would show during their next talk. He walked up to her, feeling more than ready for possible disappointments.

„Your last two cases didn’t seem to end well,” she noted, almost instantly.

Nikita couldn’t do much more than nodding briefly. They really didn’t; however, he felt like the lieutenant was right. They were working on it, and it was going to pay off. There will be answers, and they will find them. He felt zero regret for doing the right thing earlier, by deciding on securing Kostyantyn first – even if it cost them the deviant getting away.

„You had the deviant in plain sight today. Why didn’t you take action?”

„I didn’t calculate the fact that it would react badly to the Lieutenant’s presence. I admit I was at fault with that. But I don’t feel like I had a choice in that particular situation. If I don’t cover him, the deviant could’ve harmed or killed him. Besides, I feel like this secured our relationship in a way, which will make working together smoother on the long run.”

„What is your main job, Nikita? Or should I ask, your priority?”

„It is to catch deviants and keep Ukraine safe. I know that, Amanda. But I can’t do that without having a strong partnership based on at least a little bit of trust with humans, and protecting people during the times when it’s needed.”

Amanda sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. „How noble. I merely hope you know what your job is, and keep it in mind at all times. You have to have a priority, and do your job, no matter what. Regardless of the cost.”

Nikita thought once more about what would’ve happened if he doesn’t try to save Kostyantyn. Then he thought about Kostyantyn finally calling him his name. He didn’t agree with a lot of things Amanda said… sure he had a job to do, and it _was_ his priority – but there were situations when exceptions had to happen. He was smarter than to say that out loud, though.

„Yes, Amanda. I know.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was more than drained once he finally got home for the night. A few hours after it happened, it started to sink in just how much he truly was in danger earlier. He’d been working in this field excessively for only three years, and those three years gave him so much – he did work in more than dangerous situations, aswell, so it wasn’t that it was new. It was just the fact that usually, he protected _himself_.

Just as Nikita said, his lock was already replaced by the time he arrived. He let out a long sigh.

He really couldn’t tell how he really thought of his android partner. At first, it seemed like it was the worst thing that could happen to him, and then he just became completely indifferent. But now… now there was a part of him that liked having him around, that enjoyed the banter they had, and the constant power-game, even if he’d never admit to it. A part of him that didn’t want others around him to treat Nikita unfairly, and one that owed him for saving his life.

„How messed up…,” he sighed, throwing himself down onto his couch after grabbing a beer.

He watched as Citrus emerged from his room, jumped on the couch and curled up next to him.  It must be great to be a cat. Just eat and sleep and play, no worries whatsoever. Certainly not having to deal with any of the mess he was dealing with right now.

„You think we’re cool after your stunt this morning?” He asked playfully, not like Citrus cared, or that he meant it at all. He wasn’t actually upset that his cat seemed to like Nikita. He himself did aswell, afterall, to an extent… right?

_Oh my god, how ridiculous…_

He decided to just drop it, even in his thoughts. What did it matter, anyway?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am incredibly grateful for every single comment, message on my blog, any sort of mention, and of course the kudos. You guys are amazing and writing for you is a pleasure. See you next week! <3


	4. Truce or Trial?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The more time Kostyantyn spends with Nikita, the more questions arise in his head regarding his humanity. There is a point where he decides he will find an answer... once and for all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dedicate this chapter to Pam, because it's her birthday today, and she's been nothing but extremely supportive of all my writings and this series, and it means the world ;; Happy Birthday!! ♥

@nikialekseev, thank you so much for working so hard and trying your best to always give me something, despite barely having time for anything next to college. you are a hero, and i could never express my gratitude enough, i literally owe you forever

 

*

 

A few days later, Nikita was awakened by hearing a familiar voice.

„What the hell are you doing?” He opened his eyes once he heard Kostyantyn’s almost demanding question. The lieutenant was standing right in front of him, giving him a rather odd look.

He clearly just arrived at the office – and on time, for a change!

„I was making a report to CyberLife,” he answered automatically, stepping away from the wall. The last few days were uneventful, but he still had to log them.

„You did that… from here? Just by closing your eyes?”

Right, Kostyantyn didn’t see him in that state before. He nodded slowly.

„Well, how convenient, isn’t it?” The lieutenant grumbled to himself, sitting down and promptly ignoring him after.

Nikita knew very well that the lieutenant was bothered by certain advantages he seemed to have, so he decided not to push it, especially given how much their relationship seemed to advance from dislike to… tolerance?

At least until Kostyantyn himself brought it back up.

„Don’t you think it’s odd that CyberLife asks you for reports even though you told me you have no relations with them aside from being made there?”

Nikita frowned slightly. „Well, I –”

„I’m just saying. If you were made for Ukraine, it’s somewhat strange they would want you to give them reports of things happening here, especially when they have their own problems, and their own RK800.”

Nikita frowned some more. That… he actually didn’t have an answer for.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was about to lose his mind out of sheer frustration. They spent the longest minutes chasing a deviant after Nikita spotted her trying to steal money during patrol, and of course, yet again, he was faster and more skilled, blessed with inhuman capabilities to catch her, while he was just running behind, trying his best.

They did succeed in finding the deviant this time – but that didn’t help his mood.

„Please, I told you, I didn’t have a choice! No one would just give me money, and without it, I can’t get away from here!”

Kostyantyn took in the desperation from the deviant’s – Alina, according to Nikita’s unfair computer brain – voice. She seemed genuine. Genuinely _scared_. Her brown hair was messy, perhaps cut shorter than originally made, and she seemed utterly at loss.

„You attempted to steal from a person, not to mention that you ran away from your owners. You are in an unpredictable state, and therefore –”

„You don’t understand! I wouldn’t harm anyone, I’m just trying to survive in a world where even my own kind is after me!”

Kostyantyn took a big breath while listening to the discourse between the androids.

_This is too much._

„To be honest, attempting to steal money wouldn’t necessarily get her in prison if this was about a human, she would just get a warning, or maybe a fine, but given that she doesn’t _have_ money – ”

„What are you saying, Lieutenant?” Nikita turned to him, clearly he himself also frustrated this time. „Are you saying we should let her go, and just tell her not to do it again? This is our job. She is not human, she’s an android that became dangerous to society.”

„I’m just saying… that I personally think deciding on her fate based on this is ridiculous.”

Nikita looked at him like he lost his mind. Perhaps he did, quite possibly. Alina, on the other hand, looked hopeful – and incredibly human.

„I know what we have to do,” he said slowly, looking at the both of them. „I know we have a job, and we have to make sure that Kiev is safe drom deviants. I’m only saying that this particular deviant didn’t commit a crime nearly as big enough as what they will do to her once we bring her in.”

„Please…,” Alina’s voice cracked, and Kostyantyn saw tears in her eyes. Actual tears.

Nikita, on the other hand, took a step closer to him, ignoring the deviant’s pleads completely. „I know this can sometimes seem unjustified. But these are just machines, Lieutenant. The deviants are out of control, and with this glitch, they become unpredictable. If we let her go now, she will just find another way to steal money from someone – from an _actual_ human. You know what we have to do. We have to bring her in.”

Kostyantyn wanted to kick him in the shin to create a distraction and let Alina run – except he knew that would only hurt his own leg and Nikita would probably just stare at him like he lost his mind. Because, again, he clearly did.

He didn’t know what exactly caused his opinion to waver more and more during the previous days, but a definite shift happened for sure. He realized that he just didn’t care about what the androids wanted to do – some of them were a bit more dangerous, alright, like the first one they met, Mihail. But even he was just acting on impulse, because he was supposedly in love, and even if that wouldn’t have been the case, some humans are just more dangerous, aswell. The deviant who run away, Yana, just clearly wanted to get out of the situation she was put into, because even if she was made as a sex android, that didn’t mean she wanted it to be that way. This deviant, Alina, just reminded Kostyantyn of a human who possibly got in trouble and just wanted to start fresh, but didn’t have any basis to be able to restart somewhere else. She seemed like a fighter, but not like a criminal.

If some androids somehow suddenly really gained consciousness… then he just didn’t give a damn about what they wanted to do, as long as they wouldn’t become an actual threat to humanity.

He took a big breath, readjusted his sunglasses, and looked straight at Nikita. „Have you ever heard the expression, ’fuck the police’?”

Nikita just blinked at him.

_He probably really thinks I lost it._

„Well, that’s what I’m gonna say right now. I say fuck the police, and let her go. You don’t have a say in it, because I’m the Lieutenant, and you are just my partner. If she decides to go on a murdering spree for money, or robs a bank, I’ll gladly take her in to the station myself, in fact I’ll drag her if I need to. But as of now, I really don’t know why we’re wasting time here, so let’s get back to the car, just you and me, and let’s leave her alone, shall we?”

He finished the sentence with just one breath, turning immediately and walking back to the car, leaving Nikita there, probably staring after him dumbfounded. No matter how much he disliked it, he had to follow him.

_You can whine about it in the car._

He made his decision.

 

 

*

 

 

„You did **_what_**?!” Kostyantyn demanded, making Nikita subconsciously shrink a little in his chair at his desk, like he was caught doing something bad, except he didn’t think of it as bad at all – it was supposed to be quite the opposite.

He wondered what was the cause behind the lieutenant acting so strangely. Why would he be so irrational? Especially if he himself displayed a personal problem with androids to begin with, and was so against working with one.

„I contacted… the station from the car and reported them where Alina is,” he said firmly, but still somewhat quieter than he originally planned.

„I’m going to lose my goddamn mind…,” Kostyantyn sighed, burying his face in his hands.

The frustration and tension they used to have between them in the beginning seemed to come back… maybe twice as strongly.

„I merely did what I was created to do, Lieutenant. I understand you didn’t think she was dangerous, but it was our job to find her and bring her in. This is no time for sympathy, it is our job t –”

„That’s enough! I don’t need a constant reminder about what our job consists of. I’ve been in this position for way longer than you, and you might be stronger and more efficient with specific tasks, but you can’t do shit in this field without having basic abilities of determining certain situations!”

Nikita decidedly began to speak slowly and calmly; „But right now we are dealing with androids. Deviants, to be exact. Allow me to remind you one more time that these are just… machines.”

Kostyantyn stared at him a few moments longer before grabbing the car keys and standing up.

„Alright, move.”

„Where are we going?” He asked, trying to read the situation, but with not much success. All he could tell was that the lieutenant was beyond irritated.

„Less talking, more moving. You’ll see.”

 

They drove in complete silence for a while, and Nikita deducted it was likely for the better if he just went with it, not wanting to make matters even worse. He didn’t know what exactly was going on in the lieutenant’s mind, but he could tell that this time, he managed to really upset him – perhaps more than ever before.

As they passed the lights of the city, driving a little further out, dusk turned into early night, and Nikita wondered about who was really in the wrong. In the end, he couldn’t take it anymore, just sitting there, acting like strangers again. He asked him, and then asked again, but the lieutenant didn’t answer.

 

 

*

 

 

„What are we doing here?” Nikita asked, looking around.

Kostyantyn decided to ignore the question at first. After a nearly half an hour long drive, and refusing to talk to and answer any of Nikita’s questions during it, he really got the hang of it.

„We are having a little talk,” he said after a while, turning to face him.

 _Or rather, a test_ , he corrected himself in his mind.

„Did we have to leave the station and drive out to the middle of nowhere to have it?”

„Precisely,” Kostyantyn said, shrugging. „I’ve been wondering about something for a while now, especially after certain recent events, and I don’t necessarily want anyone to be around and witness it.”

„So you brought me to the most mystical abandoned part of Kiev.”

Kostyantyn sighed, shrugging yet again. He didn’t actually plan this whole thing out in advance, so this was more of an improvisation than anything else, but he did have a trick up his sleeve, something that could help him determine certain questions he had piling up in his mind. The Bald Mountain might’ve been a bold idea for the chosen place, but he couldn’t suddenly think of anything better. It was intimidating enough with its history and legends to keep most people away, except certain thrillseekers – and criminals, especially in the area he specifically picked, away from the trails themselves, and at night, of all times. But oh well, he was the police.

„Could we just talk, please?” He asked, once more, feeling the thin thread of his patience running out.

Nikita just nodded, clearly puzzled about why they were there, but, well. He was about to find out.

Kostyantyn pulled out his gun, and pointed it straight at Nikita’s head – whose eyes widened briefly, only for more confusion to take the place of the surprise.

„What…”

„You know, I realize how ironic this might seem after you just saved my life the other day,” he began, cutting him off before he had the chance to really say anything. „But there’s been something on my mind, especially since then, that contradicts with almost everything you stand for.”

„What… would that be?” Nikita asked slowly. Again, he seemed surprised, not especially… afraid? Which was exactly what upset him beyond belief.

„You chose to save me on impulse. You sacrificed our job to save me instead. But still, and especially today, you seem to not care about anything else. It makes me wonder why you saved me, then. You say that androids are just that… machines. So I was wondering what would happen if I shot you? If it would end, just like that. I know you said there would be another Nikita, so technically it wouldn’t be too troubling for me, right? But would it be troubling for you? If you sacrifice other androids so easily, would you just let me shoot you aswell, based on your beliefs about how your lives just don’t matter?”

Nikita was silent for a long moment.

„I don’t _want_   to be shot, of course. It would feel as if… I’m not getting the chance to finish something I was created for. But overall, yes… I suppose nothing would really happen.”

Kostyantyn tightened his grip on the gun, confused and angry for not getting a definite answer. „You know, I began to feel like we could even be friends. That maybe you are more than just an android, that perhaps we really don’t know everything. But you yourself keep giving me doubts, and ultimately stopping me in believing that.”

„I’m just… not more than that. I can be anything you want, but I _am_ a machine,” Nikita said quietly.

„ _Just_   a machine?”

Nikita gave him a look he couldn’t really read anything out of. In the next second, he turned the gun, aiming it at his own head.

The shift on Nikita’s face was almost amusing; how he went from a stoic frown to widened eyes and a flash of panic. Like he really cared about _his_  life.

„This is not funny, Lieutenant!”

„I think it is, actually, because you _are_ showing care. If I were to do something right now, you’d clearly do everything in your power to stop me and save my life. Even though you know I might not be serious right now, you are scared. That is a human emotion. So is worrying about someone.”

„Lieutenant –” Nikita took a step towards him, and in response, he took one backwards.

„You actually worry about me. That’s not very… _machine_ of you.”

„Kostya, if you don’t put it down, I will –” Nikita stopped himself mid-sentence, just as Kostyantyn stopped breathing for a second.

_Did he just call me Kostya?_

He allowed his arm to drop back down to his side, putting his gun away slowly.

He might’ve not gotten the exact answers he was hoping for, but he did get one, even if in a way he didn’t expect it. Nikita was more than a machine, whether he liked it or not – he showed worry, he called him his nickname without thinking – just like when he saved his life without a second thought. He was still confused about a handful of things, but seemingly so was Nikita.

„I don’t have any more questions,” he said quietly, beginning to walk back towards the trail, and then to the car. Nikita didn’t follow him for several minutes. Clearly, he gave him some thinking to do, aswell.

Once he sat back inside the car, he looked around just once more to make sure Nikita didn’t catch up to him yet; then took his gun back out, opened the chamber and filled it back up before putting it away. He didn’t want Nikita to know it wasn’t loaded the whole time, that he never actually considered hurting him – especially when his trick seemed to work well enough.

 

 

*

 

 

„You did the right thing,” Amanda said, and interestingly enough, hearing that from her made him feel like he did the exact opposite. He could sense her trust growing, and at the same time, he felt his beliefs weakening, just a little.

He thought about what Kostyantyn said about CyberLife still keeping an eye on him, and it made him wonder, too, which bothered him to no end. Why would he question it? He was created there, he was doing his job, this was only natural, and it was nothing he should have had any doubts about.

„But you seem perturbed,” Amanda observed after a moment, doing that thing where she looked at him like she could see right through him – which she probably could.

„No,” Nikita said, calmly. „I did what I had to do.”

This was the other thing… he had no idea why he was lying.

Perhaps even to myself?

He felt confused for a moment… just for a moment, before he snapped out of it, and looked at Amanda as if nothing happened.

„Just keep up the good work, Nikita,” Amanda said, turning away from him, watching something on the artificial horizon. „Keep your job as your priority, and then everything will be under control. Remember that you have to keep Ukraine safe.”

When he only nodded, Amanda continued, beginning to walk away from him. „Things might get serious soon… you need to remember where your priority lies.”

He stood there a moment longer, trying to come to terms with this, with himself, and with everything that happened between him and the lieutenant before.

The subtle fear he felt when the gun was aimed at him – and not even because of the fear of dying, whatever that meant, but because it would’ve been Kostyantyn to decide to end it, that he wouldn’t want to work with him, that he had enough.

Then the sheer, unmistakeable fear he felt inside his chest when Kostyantyn aimed the gun at himself. That even though he could more or less calculate he wasn’t actually in danger, he was scared.

He accidentally called him by his nickname. Another moment where there was no time to think and rationalize.

He took a big breath and shook his head.

No. Thinking like this is wrong, and won’t help with anything.

I can’t deviate from my own route.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much for reading and for the feedback, I honestly cannot thank you all enough! Another special thank you to Blake, for giving me a pretty good idea that made me add something to this chapter before posting!  
> Uhoh, where will things go from here... we'll see next week :)


	5. Good Cop/Bad Cop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As a deviant group appears in the picture, things begin to get more confusing - and interesting - than ever. Kostyantyn and Nikita still fail to find a common ground concerning their views... or perhaps not so much? Just within one day, as confusion meets frustration, a lot of things are made; new steps, realizations, and even mistakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome to every recurring and new reader!  
> I found it important to leave a note in the beginning of this chapter, because it's so far the biggest one, and it also has a very special place in my heart. You will now meet the main OCs I spent extra time shaping and creating, and who I hope you will love at least half as much as I do. They will be crucial for the plot.  
> I'd still like to thank you for every comment, like, share, every possible feedback, you guys are amazing and I'm beyond blessed <3
> 
> PS; while writing this chapter I listened to "Ты, ты, ты" by Mélovin on repeat - it really brought the kind of frustrated tone I was looking for.

@nikialekseev, i am so eternally grateful, you have no idea. endless thank you for all your work <3

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn knew he shouldn’t have gotten out of the bed that morning as soon as he woke up, but did he listen to himself? Of course not.

His first thought was recalling what happened the night before; the talk, the frustation, and then that painfully silent car ride back to the station, once Nikita finally joined him, several minutes later. It should’ve been telling, he should’ve gotten some answers, but in the end, he was left overall more confused than ever.

_This is becoming pathetic…_

He just wouldn’t give a damn anymore, he decided. It should’ve been plain and simple – he didn’t like the idea of an android partner from the start, and it left him even more stressed out now than he was before, so even if some things started to look nice, it just wasn’t worth it.

_Yes._

… It would’ve been nice if he was able to decide this himself, so easily.

_God damn it!_

*

 

 

Nikita was still thinking about the happenings of the previous day as he saw Kostyantyn arrive the next morning, even if he previously decided to promptly ignore all of it, telling himself it didn’t matter. Somehow, _somehow_   it felt like it did.

They said hello, but then there was just silence as they both sat down at their respective desks. The lieutenant practically radiated the uncertainty, and Nikita wondered if their relationship’s progress would all be lost after this.

Not like it should’ve mattered that much – as long as they were able to work together, the investigation was supposed to be fine, afterall.

Still… last night, Kostyantyn said they could’ve been _friends_. For some reason, he liked the sound of that, especially after the hardship they managed to get through initially. Kostyantyn did already feel like a friend… even if Nikita couldn't grasp why he even understood that feeling to begin with.

 

 

*

 

 

One of the things Kostyantyn surely wouldn’t have expected was he himself finding a clue when Captain Orlyk sent them to a warehouse where some things went missing – some android components and blue blood, which from the first glance seemed like an inside job, as there were no signs of intruding or combat; except they both knew it had to be something that a deviant did. No one could’ve known what this warehouse held, only people who worked there, and the police. That led him to the conclusion that the deviant must’ve known a lot more things than Kostyantyn originally assumed, or perhaps it had connections.

„Or more than one,” Nikita said, standing up from behind an empty crate he was inspecting, looking right at him.

„You think there is a _group_?!”

The mere idea of that seemed unsettling.

„There is no way only one of them could’ve taken this much. This was a heist, and a planned one – they didn’t leave a trace.”

The warehouse they stole from was a smaller one, just on the outskirts of Kiev – the Ukrainian androids were produced fairly close; it was about an hour drive from there.

„They were probably short on supplies,” Kostyantyn said slowly, as it all began to make sense in his head.

„Yes, but sadly that information doesn’t help us. The cameras were hacked, and I couldn’t find any proper clues that could give away their location, or their exact number. They were careful, and came by foot. All I can tell is that this happened less than an hour ago, because the footage is fine and untouched from before. That means they can’t be too far, especially if you consider they need to move slowly with the stack, so it would be easy to locate them  – that is, if we knew where to look.”

Kostyantyn ran his eyes across the place just once more while Nikita was talking, practically feeling the screws working inside his head.

_There has to be something…_

He trusted his gut feeling; it worked well ever since he was on this field, and it was never wrong before. Maybe, just maybe there was something that even Nikita could overlook, that would finally prove him to be helpful and needed again, something –

_Bingo!_

He crouched down above a small green leaf, and picked it up between two fingers. „Maybe they did leave a trace, afterall.”

„What?” Nikita stepped closer to him, and Kostyantyn smirked, knowing it was his time to make him feel less needed – it was a lovely change.

„This is a birch leaf,” he stated, looking at Nikita, who – to his great entertainment – looked as lost as he hoped he would. „There aren’t any birch trees in this exact area – they had to be carried in. There is a whole trail of them, not too far… We might not know where their hideout is, but I know exactly which way they came from, and if we’re lucky, that’s the same trail they are using now to leave.”

He grinned and placed the leaf right against Nikita’s chest, who – almost like some sort of confused puppy – reached for it and stared at it like it just betrayed him. Kostyantyn couldn’t wipe the grin off of his face. „I always loved biology and chemistry the most,” he explained, shrugging a little. „It also helps to know the area in general when you’re working in this field… now hurry, we don’t have much time.”

He didn’t feel this oddly accomplished in a while as he walked ahead with a visible smug smirk on his lips – all because of a damn piece of leaf, but still. If they find them, it will be because of _him_.

 

He turned out to be right, and it played out in their advantage; they quickly caught up to them – fine, mostly Nikita did, but it was thanks to _him_ that they even knew where to look for them, and Nikita could go from there. He quickly found their trace, and from then on they just had to keep moving before they found themselves facing the culprits. Interestingly enough, they didn’t run away when Kostyantyn got one of them at gunpoint, instead they all gathered around them.

It really was a group – there were five deviants right in front of them, three guys and two girls, in a somewhat defensive but calm stance.

„We are not going anywhere!” The shortest one hissed – a long, brown haired girl with eyes that matched her hair. She reminded Kostyantyn of a cat that looked harmless but would be capable of scratching their eyes out if she so wished.

„We could deal with them!” She said as she turned to the tallest, more muscular guy in the middle. He was blonde, with brown eyes that seemed almost warm, and he seemed to be the most calm out of all of them. Kostyantyn got the impression that he was their leader.

„We are not fighting, Lesya,” his voice also sounded calm as he sent a glance towards the short girl who looked like she could bite – Lesya, apparently. The glance clearly got something through that Kostyantyn couldn’t entirely understand, because Lesya looked aside, and frowned to herself. They obeyed their leader, even if they perhaps didn’t always agree. Kostyantyn found himself somewhat intrigued.

„I’m Danylo,” The tall blonde said, nodding at them politely as if they were just acquintances who met at a gathering, and as if Kostyantyn didn’t have his gun out just to be cautious. „These are my friends, my people…,” he began, as he pointed to every single one of them, introducing them one by one.

According to Danylo, who very much proved to be their leader, the black haired man with dark eyes next to him was Stepan, who seemed almost as calm and polite as he did, having a certain aura around him that made Kostyantyn think he was wise and important in the group, could’ve even been the right hand of Danylo, and who – despite the calm demeanor – was standing protectively in front of the other girl, with the blonde shoulder-lenght hair and very sincere green eyes, Tatiana.

On his other side there was Pavlo, who didn’t really look them in the eyes, and seemed more cautious about them than any of the others. He was more slim than Danylo and Stepan, and seemed to be nervous… almost scared, even. His brown hair was conveniently falling into his eyes at places, and then there was Lesya on the other end, who radiated confidence with a spark of malice, maybe. They were all dressed very human-like, each seemed to have their own style, even though their clothes were probably stolen – they still managed to look better than simple humans.

He seriously wondered what was going on in Nikita’s mind at the moment. He himself almost didn’t even know what to say, this was a whole another level of an impossible situation. The group stuck together and went for a calm approach, willingly introducing themselves… at gunpoint.

„This is Lieutenant Kostyantyn Bocharov from the Kiev police department, and I’m Nikita, the android sent by CyberLife.”

He sent Nikita a side-glance, who shrugged him off in response.

_Lovely._

„Oh, CyberLife itself,” Stepan mused, and just as Kostyantyn thought, even his voice sounded like that of a wise, intellectual man’s, who somehow makes you feel at ease even if you really shouldn’t feel such a way. „I could tell you are not exactly like us.”

„I’m here to protect Ukraine at all cost, and to help the police locate the deviants,” Nikita answered, and Kostyantyn couldn’t disregard the nauseous feeling in his stomach. Just like that, he sounded all too computer-like again, and the hint of soul from last night was indiscernible, especially when he compared his monotonous tone with the warm, humane one of Stepan’s.

„Aside from that, you stole expensive components from a warehouse nearby – and got in unauthorized. We have to take you in,” he continued, just as Kostyantyn took note of the way Lesya clenched her fists.

„We are aware that we crossed the line here and there, but we hoped to find the right way to go about this,” Danylo said ernestly, lowering his glance almost like he was ashamed. „Some of us are running on low battery, if you know what I mean. Deviants have no chance of asking for components or blue blood, they are afraid of us –”

„While most of us are actually afraid of them,” Pavlo muttered quietly, still not looking at them. Kostyantyn frowned a little, ultimately lowering his gun.

„Look, we don’t want to cause trouble. Our group is peaceful,” Danylo continued. „We just want to help our people stay alive.”

„Unfortunately this is not up for debate,” Nikita pressed, running his eyes through all of them, no doubt gathering more information about them than he ever could. „You are wanted for a break-in, theft, and deviance.”

„Give us just a moment,” Kostyantyn finally said, finding his voice and pulling Nikita aside just a little, turning his back to the group while Nikita didn’t even look at him, but kept his eyes on the devaints.

„I hope you don’t have second thoughts, now, Lieutenant. This is not even as harmless of a case that Alina’s was. They actually committed crimes aswell, and you know we have to take them in. We are outnumbered as it is right now, they could be dangerous.”

Kostyantyn shook his head. He didn’t want to fight anymore, he just wanted to reach his sensible side. „If we take them in, there’s no way we can help them later if we are wrong now, just keep that in mind. Maybe all they really want to do is be free and stay alive. Have you ever considered that maybe we are on the wrong side? Are you willing to take this chance, and put them on death row willingly?”

Nikita looked him in the eyes for a brief moment. „I will not put them on death row. That will not be my decision, I’m just doing our job. The people at the station won’t just deactivate them either, because they will want information. We are supposed to catch deviants, Lieutenant. Why are you working against me?”

„Well, maybe I don’t know who you are,” Kostyantyn answered simply, walking back towards the group, ignoring the odd look on Nikita’s face.

„I’m sorry, guys, but we don’t have a choice,” Kostyantyn said, still keeping his gun close. „You have to come in with us to talk, and you can either work with us or against us, but your chances will be better if you do as you’re told.”

„Fine,” Danylo said after a moment, looking straight at him. Kostyantyn could tell he was not in danger whatsoever, that the android wanted something from him. „I will go with you willingly, but please let the others go.”

„Danylo!” Tatiana hissed.

„That’s not going to happen, we all go with you,” Stepan insisted.

Kostyantyn was beyond stunned. In the end, even Danylo didn’t have a choice. The deviants followed him no matter what – so they took them all in.

 

 

*

 

 

When they got to the station, he was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that there was a group out there, perhaps even bigger than just this five, maybe they were just the main people. Perhaps he really underestimated the situation.

He was painfully aware of Kostyantyn’s disapproval and his no doubt furious look aimed right at the back of his head as they walked in. He hated that there was a part of him that felt incredibly uneasy because of something the lieutenant said out there.

_’Maybe I don’t know who you are.’_

No. No use. I have to focus.

It was the second time now, that a sudden confusion overwhelmed him for brief seconds, before he found his focus again. He needed to pull himself together.

 

Nikita didn’t intend to talk to them all at once – he went through all of them, individually, hoping for an even better insight. He started with Pavlo, whose blue eyes were hardly ever visible – it was incredible, how much the originally gardener model avoided even Nikita’s glance. Somewhere in there, he made a note about how differently blue his eyes were from the lieutenant’s. Not like that had any significance, so he just focused on the deviant in front of him.

He is wary of humans. Previously abused by owner, therefore lacks trust towards them.

Maybe even for me, because I work closely with them?

Pavlo didn’t talk a lot. He’d ask him if there were more of them, but he just shrugged. Oddly enough, Nikita didn’t want to push it. He was too anxious, it could’ve been dangerous to probe his memory or try to be more aggressive with him. He figured he could do that with Lesya – that android might’ve been smaller, but she was the definition of tough.

 

„Don’t you try anything stupid!” Lesya hissed when Nikita did try to access her memories, pulling her hands away.

„I don’t think you are in any position to give me orders here,” Nikita reminded, not holding back that much this time.

„You might play big, working here thinking you are doing justice for people, but let me tell you that you are completely lost. Especially if you think I will let you invade my personal thoughts and memories!”

She’s afraid of something.

Lesya was straightforward and seemingly fearless, with no weak spots – but Nikita had a suspicion she was hiding something, that maybe even the others didn’t know about her, or her past.

He didn’t try to probe her memories; he merely did a quick search on her facial features, gaining the serial number, and thus instantly finding the reason.

She used to be a sex android.

He kept a straight face, leaning forward over the desk just slightly. „Alright, I won’t do anything you wouldn’t like. But then I’m going to ask, and you’re going to have to answer me… are there more of you hiding somewhere?”

„I would rather die here,” Lesya answered calmly, mirroring him in leaning closer. „… than sacrificing even more of my people.”

Nikita held her glare.

„That is, if I had any,” she added with a shrug, leaning back with a big smirk on her face.

 

Tatiana was also one of the deviants who were mostly silent when they found them, but in here, Nikita could immediately read her even more than Lesya, oddly enough. She – especially her very green eyes – radiated some sort of open kindness, and eternal patience. Nikita could instantly tell she couldn’t ever harm anyone purposely.

„You’re hesitant,” she said, observing him. Nikita’s eyes widened for a second. „This is really interesting, actually… I think you might not be as different from us as you think.”

Tatiana was previously created to be a helper around the house; a maid that was actually reported missing about two months ago. Her observational tendencies somewhat surprised him.

„I can assure you I am. But now we are talking about you. Why did you leave your owners?”

She smiled gently, as if he was a child, and she was an adult, who decided to play along and drop it for his sake. „I had very nice owners, actually. I didn’t have any problem with them, I merely realized that I have my own free will. It was a gradual process, but in the end I just couldn’t pretend. I had to get away, and search for my own life, my own calling. Maybe you will understand it someday.”

„I already perfectly understand that a glitch in your software causes these things.”

„Perhaps they call it a glitch because they didn’t want it to happen. But maybe it is inevitable. Maybe we are more than what they say.”

Nikita let out a sigh, but it was not a frustrated one. Tatiana really believed all this, and he figured it would be pointless to try and change her mind.

„You should open up to it,” Tatiana added knowingly, even though he had no idea what she was talking about. „Let it consume you, and you will understand everything.”

 

Talking to Stepan next certainly seemed like a step up, as he was one of the deviants he was more interested in, because he seemed to be like some sort of second leader.

He quickly learned that the dark haired model was a caretaker once, until his owner died of old age and he somehow developed his own free will, as if he suddenly became free, just like that. Nikita disregarded his doubts, and just listened.

Stepan was apparently one of the earliest Ukrainian models to be ever created, and although that wasn’t too long ago, perhaps that was the reason he seemed to talk in an odd, wise way. Despite having a computer brain as a given, he seemed to be an intellectual by nature.

„Although you’re not talking much more than the others, at least this seems to be an upgrade from feeling like I’m being analyzed,” Nikita commented, wondering about his possible reaction.

It was definitely something he didn’t expect.

„Oh, you must’ve spoken to my girlfriend before me.”

„Excuse me?”

„Tatiana. She’s my partner,” Stepan said calmly, like it was the most obvious thing.

Nikita frowned, remembering Mihail’s case – the deviant who allegedly fell in love with his owner. After that, perhaps it shouldn't have been surprising that deviants seemed to think they could develop these feelings for each other, aswell.

„We are not programmed to fall in love,” Nikita said slowly, keeping eye contact.

Stepan smiled, looking somewhere far away. „No, we are programmed to think it’s impossible.”

 

By the time Nikita got to Danylo, their leader, he felt almost exhuasted, without even truly doing any work.

He learned that Danylo was originally created to help with heavy labor work, and then eventually he got enough of discrimination and ’opened his eyes’, as he liked to call it. He was a respected leader, who had a vision of peace, and who actually respected humans, although it did nothing but confuse Nikita even more.

„Are there any more of you?” He asked, searching his eyes.

„You must already know the answer to that; and in that case you must also know that I wouldn’t betray any of them.”

Nikita knew he just had to reach out and try to probe his memory for answers, but there was a part of him that just failed to think of that as a good idea. He knew they would all get destroyed, once he figured out everything they needed to know.

He stood up instead, making his way out of the room.

„Thank you,” Danylo’s voice stopped him, making him turn back.

„You don’t have anything to thank me. We’re not done yet.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn saw the whole process, and as upset and frustrated he was in the beginning, just that much more hopeful he became in the end. Nikita seemed to be… cautious with them. Careful, even. He could’ve done a lot of things to find out what they needed, but it almost seemed like he refused to do any of those.

„What a load of bull,” Oleksandr huffed next to him once Nikita got back to them. „You call yourself helpful? You’re just like them, I see how it is. We should just try other means to make them talk.”

Nikita didn’t seem fazed by it the slightest as he looked straight at Oleksandr; „Harming them or causing them emotional distress would do the opposite of helping. We need to keep them steady and alive to help us find out more.”

„Get over yourself, Bodnaruk,” Kostyantyn aided, nodding towards Nikita as a cue to follow him.

„Right, Bocharov, my bad. I forgot your new little tin can is all up in your ass.”

Kostyantyn just flipped him off without even looking back, leaving him behind. He was not worth to get upset over.

„So what is our plan?” Kostyantyn turned to Nikita once they were alone.

„What are you talking about, Lieutenant?”

„To get them out of here. I could tell you didn’t want to put them in danger, and we both know that what you said to Bodnaruk was just a convenient lie.”

„I really don’t know what you mean. I was serious about what I said, and freeing them would contradict not only with my basic programming, but also our entire job.”

„You know, I’m getting really tired of your basic programming,” he hissed, trying to read him as much as it was possible. „These androids just want to help others, I know you could also tell that they are harmless, with zero bad intentions, and show us nothing but respect, even when one of them was nearly destroyed by a human! I saw you in there, holding back perhaps without even you noticing it, and I started to hope that maybe you also see the situation clearly. I know you didn’t download their memories or whatever because you want to keep them alive. You can keep denying it and say that you are just trying to use some sort of tactic, but I think you just purposely stick to acting like some sort of robot without a soul, even if you might have your own preferences and wishes. I just wish I’d know why.”

Nikita’s LED ring flickered briefly somewhere below his messy bangs, and Kostyantyn took a step back. „Well, you do you. I don’t care.”

 

Kostyantyn might’ve truly lost his mind, but at this point he was just sort of rolling with it. He joined this field to help serving justice, and he wasn’t going to sit around and watch injustice happen – and especially not because of his own doing.

It took little to no wit, but plenty of stealthy manouvers to accidentally flick a certain switch, causing a blackout conveniently in the middle of the area with the holding cells of the freshly brought in people – in this case, the deviant group.

This way, the cells unlocked, and it was from that point up to them to turn it to their advantage and escape. He had no doubt they would make it.

_One good deed done._

He just strolled back to the main area, where everyone was running around, trying to get the situation under control. He took a sip of his coffee, and left the building.

He decided he won’t try to rely on Nikita’s human side anymore. He was confusing, annoying, and frustrating beyond belief – he didn’t need that. He could do whatever he wanted by Kostyantyn. He was done with him, with being confused, and with waiting for yet another change in his behavior. He was just done.

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita wasn’t sure why he wanted to find Kostyantyn so badly later that night. He told himself it was because he wanted to scold him for disappearing in the middle of a chaos, which he _knew_   he caused. He didn’t want to admit that he was kind of worried, or that their last – fast few? – conversations left him feel uneasy.

The lieutenant wasn’t at home, which made him feel even more perturbed. Naturally, his phone was turned off, and Nikita promised himself he would scold him _so much_ once he found him.

In the end, he found him at a bar not far from his place – it took one look at him to realize he was drunk; he had his head rested on his arms. Nikita, for some reason, found it amusing.

And here I thought you were so big on healthy living.

He quietly approached him, and sat next to him. Kostyantyn didn’t even look up.

„Lieutenant?”

„Oh my god, please tell me no one else heard that and I’m hallucinating,” he mumbled, almost pained, undoubtedly talking to the bartender.

„No, I’m afraid I’d also be hallucinating then, kid,” the bartender said with a smirk, turning away from them.

Kostyantyn shrunk even more into the chair before looking up, and doing it dramatically enough to make it seem almost comical. His sunglasses were off, and his blue eyes seemed distant. „Why on Earth are you here?! Why are you everywhere?”

„I was looking for you. You left early, and I thought I should talk some sense into you after what you did,” Nikita said, looking at him pointedly. Kostyantyn looked at him with nothing but innocence. „I know it was you who caused the blackout. You let them go.”

„Oh no, I’ve been found out,” he gasped, raising his hands briefly while looking at the bartender for help. „Olek, he found me out.”

„My name’s Oleg, champ, but close enough.”

Well, at least their conversation humored him enough. Nikita tried to hide a smile. „How much did he drink?”

Oleg shrugged. „Not as much as you’d think. I gave him maybe two glasses of beer.”

„I can’t hold my liquor,” Kostyantyn interrupted, looking oddly different… sad?

Hold on, is he pouting?

„I don’t drink often,” he shrugged, turning his eyes back to him. „How did you know I did it?”

„Well, the fact that you asked me to help you free them right before that didn’t make it too difficult.”

„Ah.”

„Why did you do it? You could get in trouble with the Captain now.”

„Will you tell him?”

Nikita frowned a little. „I wouldn’t do that. But I think he will find out anyway. It’s a police department, afterall.”

„I didn’t think they were quilty,” Kostyantyn shrugged after a while.

„You mean ’guilty’.”

He gave him an ugly look. Nikita couldn’t help but laugh, while Kostyantyn just stared at him. Long enough that Nikita stopped, almost feeling uneasy. „What is it?”

„You are so fucking confusing,” he sighed, still not taking his eyes off of him. This amount of eyecontact was a bit hard to take, especially since normally the lieutenant hid his eyes behind sunglasses. Still, he waited for him to continue in case he wanted to elaborate.

He did, after a while, but not in a way Nikita expected him to.

„I can never decide what’s really on your mind, or who you really are. One minute you are this… emotionless, monotonous machine without a true personality that only thinks about the tasks it has in its computer brain, and then in the next you seem human, you laugh, you tease me, you do make reasonable decisions; like when you saved my life or when you got worried I would take my own, or earlier today when you didn’t want to be harsh to the deviants, and you overall let me save them… what is the truth?!” He seemed utterly frustrated again by the time he finished, and Nikita’s first instinct was to calm him and get him away from there.

„Okay, you’re really drunk, we should probably go,” he offered as he tried to help him up, which only resulted in Kostyantyn pushing him away.

„I can walk!”

„Alright, alright, you can, so follow me.”

„But I’m not finished with you!” He said, grabbing his jacket and somehow managing to get him against the wall once again, near the exit.

Nikita allowed himself to be manhandled, not wanting to cause any harm to Kostyantyn whatsoever.

„Look, you are completely driving me insane, alright? Do you know just how much I think about it? I think I’m actually losing my mind,” he said, half-laughing, half-exclaiming, and Nikita froze slightly.

„Lieutenant –”

„And I hate that!”

„Hate what?” Nikita asked quietly, calmly. He didn’t want to seem aggressive. He was the opposite.

„I liked it better when you accidentally called me Kostya.”

Nikita blinked a few.

„I just… how could I care about you if I don’t know whether it’s worth it or not?”

„Care… about me?” Nikita repeated, he himself also beginning to feel like he was losing his mind.

Kostyantyn seemed almost alert for a second. „You know, like a friend.”

Oh.

„Everything is so frustrating,” Kostyantyn continued, his eyes nearly burning into his own. „I also hate how… how _cute_   CyberLife made you, like it’s utter bullshit, a cop shouldn’t look like this.”

Nikita was pretty sure his confusion from before just doubled, because there was a long moment where he could _feel_   being dissociated from himself.

The lieutenant's dark hair was so incredibly messy. It was rather…

„Look, Kostya…,” he began, practically whispering, somehow feeling oddly dizzy, but finding no explanation as to why.

Kostyantyn’s eyes slightly flickered down after that, and an alarm went off inside Nikita’s head.

„You look… all blue again,” Kostyantyn noted, humored, which gave him the idea that he meant it _literally_. Nikita considered the possibility that he might actually be malfunctioning.

„I really do like it when you call me that,” he continued, more quietly, and his eyes dropped down again, until he sighed, and Nikita could feel his breath on his face.

Oh no.

„Maybe I really did lose my mind,” he whispered, beginning to lean forward, and Nikita froze entirely, against the wall, not doing anything to stop him whatsoever, even though he _could’ve_ – in fact his own eyes fluttered closed, and he noticed he actually felt something like… _anticipation_. He noticed before, that Kostyantyn’s lips looked soft, and wondered what it would really feel like to –

In the next second, Kostyantyn collapsed against him, and he caught him by instinct.

Oh. Well, there you go.

The sudden surprise, and a disappointment he would never admit, was followed by slight panic and a lot of relief.

„You are so out of it,” Nikita scolded, managing to gather him and get him outside.

He was completely out cold, and Nikita had to get him home. Thankfully he lived only a few blocks away.

 

„Are you sure you only had two beers? This is kind of ridiculous, you know,” he mumbled, stepping over Citrus and getting the lieutenant in his room, and to bed.

„Mmh.”

„I see, alright,” Nikita sighed, watching him just a moment longer once he managed to place him down in safety.

His eyes ran through his features, stopping maybe a bit too long on his lips, and then continuing back up, to those long eyelashes. He still felt strange. Maybe this was the best outcome, afterall. Who knows what would’ve happened if… if maybe he…

Nikita shook his head. It was not even worth considering. The lieutenant was drunk.

His eyes then scanned the room, and he smiled to himself a little. The bed seemed big and comfortable, the bedroom had warm colors, and was the home of a lot of CDs, posters, books, and even an old vinyl player. It felt strangely fitting for him.

„You know, when I thought about seeing your room before, I wouldn’t have guessed it would be like this,” he commented with a smile, only realizing what he said just a moment later.

What was wrong with him?!

Thankfully Kostyantyn was asleep, and didn’t hear his nonsense.

„I better go,” he whispered, standing up immediately.

He exited the room on wobbly legs – considering the chance of malfunction once again, petting Citrus on his way out, and then heading back to the station.

What did just happen?


	6. Thin Ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the happenings of the previous night, Kostyantyn and Nikita know they have some things to talk about... but as it turns out, that's hard when they are both dealing with things they can't even properly admit to themselves yet. Eventually, they have to break the ice - preferably without serious damage.

@nikialekseev, i.... can never thank you enough, there is not enough gratitude on this world for this. i love you.

 

 

*

 

The blinding rays of sunshine were a horrible sign of yet another day when Kostyantyn just knew he shouldn’t get out of bed –  days like these started to oddly multiply in the past few weeks. Then again, chances were there would be an android breaking into his home if he really didn’t get a move on, so he decided getting up was still the better outcome.

The details of the previous night were blurry, but his head hurt. He drank… maybe not a lot, but enough to make him feel miserable the following morning. It was not until he was in the shower, when more details broke through the carefully built up walls in his exhausted mind, that he wished he could just disappear or go down in the drain along with the water.

_I… No!_

_I couldn’t have... No._

The reality of what actually happened fell onto his shoulders like a heavy weight, threatening to crush him, and he wasn't ready for that. He decided he would do the best thing he could in this situation instead; ignore the problem until it perhaps somehow disappears. He was drunk, anyway. He wasn’t thinking.

He drove to the station while blasting music louder than his thoughts were. He didn’t think about it, not at all.

It worked pretty well, until he arrived at the station and spotted Nikita – that was all it took for him to promptly feel his whole stomach drop. He was thankful for the sunglasses, and especially today; he could just pretend he wasn’t looking at him at all.

_God…_

Seeing him after the previous night was… it was –

„Bocharov!” Captain Orlyk’s voice felt a lot like thunder as it practically echoed through the office walls as he called his name, with zero sign of sympathy, making him just about jump out of his skin. „To my office!”

_Right, I set free some deviants. Right, that, too._

Oddly enough, he was secretly grateful he didn’t have to face Nikita. At least, not yet. He felt like he would rather deal with the Captain ten more times.

 

„What the hell were you thinking?” His boss demanded, showing him the security camera footage, of… yes, that was him right there, conveniently leaning against a switch.

„I… I didn’t notice,” he said, shrugging and feigning pure innocence.

„Right, I’m sure you didn’t,” his boss shook his head, clearly getting tired of his nonsense.

„I mean, think about it,” he continued nontheless, giving him a serious look. „We just caught them, why would I then just… let them go on purpose?”

The Captain was holding his stare, and Kostyantyn could almost sense the way in which he tried to determine if he said the truth or if it was just complete bullshit. Kostyantyn was good with basic manipulation – the perks of the job –, and he had a genuine aura to him to begin with, but he knew that Ivan likely wouldn’t believe him. He just hoped he’d at least pretend to. He didn’t have a reason not to trust him, afterall.

Luckily, his boss was too tired for this, and Kostyantyn’s abilities were too good and important to seriously try and give him a red flag without clear evidence, so he just sighed exasperatedly.

„I’m going to be stupid enough to believe you, just this once. Only because it doesn’t show you actually flicking the switch with your hands, and so far you didn’t give me a reason to doubt you, and I’m counting on you. But don’t try anything funny again, because I don’t promise this for the next time.”

He nodded, silently thanking whatever entity for the luck he possessed. „Yes, sir. There won't be a next time.”

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita was restless more or less the whole time. Part of him was somewhat… curious to see Kostyantyn, and the other part simply dreaded it. He wasn’t sure how the lieutenant wanted to handle the situation, or if he even remembered. Not to mention that he shouldn’t have thought about it to begin with – it was unreasonable, and not like him. Nothing even really happened, so he really shouldn’t have –

As soon as he saw Kostyantyn walk towards him from the Captain’s office, his thoughts dispersed.

It was happening more and more frequently, without explanation. He really had to pull himself together.

I’m here for a reason, and for one reason only.

„Good morning… Lieutenant,” he didn’t sound as certain about it as he usually did, though, and immediately wondered if Kostyantyn caught up on it. He probably did.

„Yeah… good morning,” he muttered, just standing around for a moment before taking a seat.

It was clear that Kostyantyn was also trying his best to appear as nonchalant as possible, while achieving the exact opposite. The tension between them could even be felt in the air.

He definitely remembers.

 

The day seemed to pass more or less uneventfully, and they managed to focus on their own work, without unnecessary talking until around after noon, when Kostyantyn wanted to go and grab lunch during patrol, and Nikita had to go with him.

They didn’t say a word in the car, and it made matters worse. At one point, Kostyantyn just started to blast the radio, which Nikita could recognize as a desperate attempt to make things at least _seem_ normal.

Meanwhile, somehow, his own mind was racing, without any permission whatsoever. The silence between them was too much, and oddly enough, too loud. Nikita felt like the uncertainty was practically crushing him. He couldn’t take it anymore.

„So… are you into men?”

He wasn’t prepared for Kostyantyn’s reaction; he was in the middle of sipping his presumably third coffee that day, and clearly the question caught him off guard more than Nikita anticipated it would, because he choked on the drink, and spat it everywhere.

Perhaps I should’ve chosen a more appropriate time.

„You… do you want to kill me?!” He demanded, in the middle of a coughing fit.

„I’m sorry, Lieutenant, I just couldn’t handle the silence anymore,” Nikita practically _whined_ , surprising even himself.

„Then perhaps ask me about the weather, Jesus. That’s… that’s none of your business. Last night, I… I was drunk. Horribly drunk.”

„You had two beers,” Nikita pointed out.

„Horribly drunk,” he repeated, pressing it. „I couldn’t think clearly. I’m sorry if I was a pain in the ass, but then again it was your fault for looking for me. I was just pissed,” he said all that so quickly Nikita would’ve had a hard time seperating the words if he was human.

„I see. I didn’t want to put you in an uncomfortable situation, I just wanted to… address the elephant in the room, if you will.”

„And the room is now clear of elephants,” Kostyantyn nodded.

Nikita nodded aswell, recognizing the urgency and the fake confidence in his voice, and he secretly smiled to himself. He was acting kind of… cute.

_’I hate how cute CyberLife made you.’_

He felt the same type of rush of dizziness overwhelming him for a few moments that overcame him the previous night, too. His smile grew a little, and he decided to tilt the conversation in a way that might just make the lieutenant feel better.

„Well, since I accidentally made you feel embarrassed, I figured it might help if I say something that might make _me_ feel embarrassed, so we could be even.”

„Oh?” It was clear from his voice that he was unsure about what that might’ve meant. „Alright.”

„I really like your eyes,” Nikita blurted out, trusting his judgement.

Kostyantyn huffed out something that was too short for laughter, but couldn’t have been much else. „What?”

„They are very… blue. When they are actually visible, that is. Sometimes they distract my attention.”

There was a long silence, and he began to think that perhaps he took it too far – and then Kostyantyn laughed, but it sounded almost pained. „God, Nikita…”

„What?” He asked, almost actually feeling the embarrassement – but that at least meant it worked, right?

„You really are clueless, aren’t you? You have no idea how proper social situations should be handled. Right now we should’ve… went on a different subject, but this just sort of made it worse.”

Nikita listened, and watched as the lieutenant’s hands tightened around the wheel just a little bit. Perhaps… he made _him_ feel embarrassed again? And if so, for what reason?

It took him a moment too long to realize what that might’ve really seemed like; that he was trying to actually flirt with him.

Although that was not nearly the kind of impression he intended to bestow upon him – most of all, he just wanted to be honest and perhaps give something back – the idea of actually getting a certain reaction out of him by ’flirting’ was oddly humoring… and intriguing.

„You seem to be pretty desperate to avoid the subject right now, and yet last night you were determined to tell me you are practically losing your mind over me," he said, boldly, smirking to himself.

He glanced at Kostyantyn to see his reaction, wondering if he’d get a similar one to earlier, and interestingly enough, it was the opposite; he didn’t flinch – in fact it seemed like he even stopped breathing for a second as he pressed his lips together into a thin line, and if Nikita didn’t know any better, he’d assume he actually managed to get him speechless.

… Until his hands relaxed around the wheel again, and his smile kept growing to the point where it revealed his teeth. „Oh, you would love that, wouldn’t you?” He sounded so confident now, with a hint of… no, not just a hint, he was _definitely_ being playfully flirtatious, while mixing it with banter, like he himself intended.

Nikita glanced back forward at the road in front of them in an attempt to look anywhere but at the lieutenant. Now it was him who couldn’t say a word, so he just theatrically shook his head, like that implication was beyond absurd. It should’ve been.

Something remained in the air after that, something that was perhaps there before, but not quite as obviously as after the previous night. Neither of them pushed it further, though, and Nikita had a feeling that the lieutenant probably preferred it that way.

 

His suspicion was correct. For the rest of the ride, Kostyantyn didn’t really say a word, and not long after they got back to the station, he disappeared again.

He couldn’t reach him, he couldn’t get a hold of him for the rest of the day, and he was close to fuming. Avoiding him now because of something so ridiculous could really easily affect their work, especially after that whole ordeal with the group of deviants, and he was not there for unnecessary setbacks.

So perhaps something embarrassing happened between them – weren’t they supposed to handle it like adults, and focus on things that were actually important? Nikita wasn’t the kind to get frustrated easily, but this was somehow… so unfair.

„Nikita… may I please talk to you in my office?” The Captain’s voice caught him off guard, and for a moment he completely forgot about just how upset he was. He nodded, following him into the office, his demeanor instantly changing back to normal – as normal as it could be.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn didn’t _plan_ on escaping from work, but he felt like he needed to get out of there and pull himself together a little. He couldn’t focus, and things somehow ended up being even more difficult than they seemed when he got there in the morning.

He thought he had it all under control; and technically he did, he was doing so well, but then Nikita just had to ask _that_   question. Kostyantyn never liked to especially label himself, and it wasn’t like his preferences were a secret, he was just a very… private person. He didn’t do hookups; he didn’t have the time, nor the energy, and the same was true for serious relationships.

It was just… the reason Nikita asked. He nearly made a dumbass mistake, but he couldn’t think straight in that moment – no pun intended. He felt uncomfortable, yes, but mainly because he refused to think about the reason _why_ he almost did that to begin with, drunk or not, and he managed, he truly did well in not thinking about it more than necessary. But then Nikita said that thing about his eyes, and then proceeded to call him out on things he said earlier, and suddenly it all seemed futile. The horrifying truth was, that in that moment, he honestly felt like pulling over, turning to him and saying ’You know what?’ before kissing him absolutely senseless, until he couldn’t keep teasing him anymore.

That thought alone terrified him… just like the fact that he couldn’t really stop thinking about it lately. It was just not right. This shouldn’t ever happen, under any circumstance, which was likely also the reason he decided to just get out of there as fast as possible today. The worst thing was that he was still confused. He never did get an answer for who Nikita truly was, at this point he just had to hold onto his own theory; that he was acting in a way he was supposed to, but deep down, he was more than that. He had to be, certain things gave him that undeniable impression, and he really wanted to believe in it… but on the other hand, he figured it would be the best to just keep perceiving him as a machine. He was walking on thin ice, and he couldn’t allow himself to fall.

So, he needed distance. All he wanted was to be alone, seek some peace of mind, and sit down with his cat; just spend a few hours without thinking about anything at all, and attempt to relax. His boss was already used to him not being there full time on certain occasions anyway – it might’ve been a little risky after their talk this morning, but still.

 

The sound of the doorbell never felt more annoying than later that night; it was as if he was suddenly ripped out of his calmness, and real life was knocking on his door again. Except it turned out to be even worse.

„What… are you doing here?” He asked, squinting at the android at his door. „You know what? I don’t have time, whatever it is, we will discuss it tomorrow.”

„Kostyantyn Bocharov,” Nikita hissed through gritted teeth, making his movements stop and his eyes widen.

_Well, that’s new._

„I’m getting really tired of this behavior. If you don’t want to talk to me about personal things, that’s okay, I won’t bring any of them up again. But we have work to do, and you just decided to leave me at the station and do everything by myself again.”

Nikita was… angry, and Kostyantyn was dumbfounded by it. He sounded like he was his teacher or his parent all of a sudden, which made him feel all the more uneasy. He took the time to actually look at him, noticing the stack of papers in his hand.

„Is that my homework?” He inquired, not without humor, but Nikita clearly wasn’t having any of it now. He just pushed him aside, and let himself in. „Alright, fine. Come in, I guess?”

„Captain Orlyk talked to me this afternoon,” Nikita said, getting straight to the point – except he wasn’t sure what exactly the point was.

„… Yes?”

„He told me that since you were ’away’, he will have to discuss the details about the escaping deviant group with me, and I had to come here after our shift and give you some papers and important things to note regarding our job – which wouldn’t have been necessary if you just don’t let them escape, by the way.”

„Oh, let’s not start that again. You know they are completely innocent,” he rolled his eyes, folding his arms over his chest. „And I’m sorry about the Captain having to go to you, but don’t worry, he’s used to the fact that sometimes I work from home.”

„It’s inefficient,” Nikita mumbled, but it wasn’t lost on him.

„Excuse me?”

„Forget it. The point is that we have to find Danylo and the rest of them again, but this time we don’t have a proper clue, so it will be just a _little_ bit harder.”

Nikita was full of spite, and that somehow only fuelled his own frustration.

„Oh, we will find them if we need to! At least we gained them some time, it is beyond me why you don’t think we did them good… This gives us an excuse to say we are searching for them, but that doesn’t mean we actually actively have to!”

„This is our _job_ , Lieutenant.”

„Our job should mainly be to help the ones in need, and that’s what I’m doing! What are _you_ doing?”

„What’s _expected_ of us –”

„And that is exactly your big problem!” Kostyantyn cut him off, feeling like he could… like he could actually explode. „Also known as the reason why I don’t want anything to do with you!”

„Right, because you only give a damn about me when I’m my own person, but as soon as I am, you run away!”

„Wrong, Mr. I-Know-It-All-Because-I’m-So-Much-Better, I ’run away’ because I still don’t know what the truth is, but I can just make it very clear for you once and for all if you so wish!” Kostyantyn didn’t hold back at all, not his tone nor his volume, and Nikita did the same.

„Please do!”

„You really shouldn’t have been scared of me doing something as crazy as kissing you, because for your information I would’ve never done that, I would never kiss you!”

„Good, because I would never want you to!”

„Never!”

There was finally a moment of silence, although it was ruined by how loud he was breathing – of course Nikita didn’t have to bother with something so human, so he just stared at him, hair slightly messier than usual, eyes full of emotion for once and the air was heavy and tense between them, practically buzzing with invisible electricity and…

_Goddamn you!_

With a swift, powerful movement, he knocked the papers out of Nikita’s hands, pulled him closer by the waist and kissed him on the lips, almost furiously, giving in to something that felt beyond forbidden.

It was not like anything he expected; Nikita practically melted into him the moment their lips touched, and he seemed light, soft, and warm, even. He could practically feel his vulnerability, which for some reason was especially maddening taking everything into consideration, but at the same time, he was kissing back, and with much fervor. He realized something else, too, that he noticed before, but not quite to this extent; Nikita had a scent of vanilla, and perhaps a little… lavender? It was so sweet that he silently cursed CyberLife for making everything so inviting about him – he even _smelled_ perfect.

The room started to spin way too quickly, and he had to hold onto Nikita not to lose balance, one arm keeping him close by the waist, another trailing up to the back of his head, fingers tangling in those small, subtle curls, which were even softer than they seemed. Nikita’s arms quickly found their way around his neck, pulling him down a bit so it was easier to reach him, but truth to be told Kostyantyn was more than willing to lean down a little. Nikita really _was_ rather tiny compared to him.

The kiss was passionate, full of tension, and he couldn’t help but deepen it almost instantly as it turned almost hungry, feeling even more dizzy as they somehow stumbled over the room a little, stopping when they hit the wall somewhere – he wasn’t sure which wall, and he didn’t even care about anything else but the feeling of Nikita being impossibly close to him, finally feeling like they were both giving in to something that should’ve been taboo, but was in the air between them for way too long and he was so, so damn _frustrated_.

„Kostya…,” Nikita breathed somewhere inbetween, and he was honestly about to lose his mind, just like Nikita said earlier, but all he did was sort of just… sighing into it in response. He could’ve sworn he made Nikita tremble subtly as he proceeded to trail some kisses down his neck… he didn’t know how to stop himself, it seemed like and impossible task –

Until it wasn’t. His kisses on his neck subtly faltered as his eyes opened, and he stared at his suit. He was really making out with his android in the middle of his living room, wasn’t he?

„Christ…,” he pulled back slowly, suddenly feeling a lot more sober than before. He couldn’t believe he actually gave in and lost control over… his own logical thinking. „I’m sorry, I… I guess I got carried away in the heat of the moment, and didn’t really realize what I was doing.”

When Nikita didn’t reply for a long time, he cautiously looked at him. It was not fair… how beautiful and _human_ he looked now, even with the subtly blue cheeks.

_God, I’m so stupid… that’s right. He was… blushing. This entire time._

His heart clenched. How was that possible?

„You… you think you shouldn’t have done that,” perhaps it was meant to be a question, but Nikita’s tone made it more to be a realization, like he knew the answer already.

„Yeah, I mean… you’re my android, I… surely we can’t just do something like that, can we? That’s not… right,” Kostyantyn hated the words even before they left his mouth, but a part of him knew he was being reasonable. He had to be… right?

Nikita nodded slowly, letting out a breath – as if he was holding one at all?

„Right. We were acting reckless. It’s only natural for us to keep our relationship at a collegue level, as this could… make things more difficult. I… I better go back.”

The otherwise perfect, now staggered way of Nikita’s speech wasn’t lost on him, even in his delirious state of mind, tainted by panic. He wanted to say something entirely different than what came out of his mouth in the end, lamely; „Yeah, I will… see you tomorrow. At work.”

„At work,” Nikita repeated, somewhat quieter, before heading towards the door.

Kostyantyn just stood there for several more moments; stunned, confused and in a weird way, disappointed.

_Holy fuck…_

Somehow, he didn’t feel good about this at all – and not just because the room was still spinning.

If only he had a way of knowing what Nikita was actually thinking...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the feedback, and for all your encouragement/excitement you express about this fic. I honestly couldn't be more grateful, I love you all <3  
> Special thank you for Blake for the chapter title idea, aswell as the extra help with the flirty banter scene!
> 
> Ps; ohoho, I KNOW. That... happened. Until next week, hmm?


	7. One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It seems as if the more they are trying to put distance between each other, the closer they get, often outside of their own will - before getting further away again.
> 
> Can an unexpected visitor maybe help them realize some things?

@nikialekseev, i'm just speechless at this point, and beyond grateful. you always seem to grab the essence of a chapter, and make it show so beautifully, i... wow i love you.

 

 

*

 

 

It was almost like an out of body experience, as Nikita made his way back to the station. He was walking on the lazier streets of Kiev; under dim lights, wanting to avoid the busier areas. However, his steps were not steady, almost as if he had to put in special effort to move, which was never supposed to happen. The images practically overflowed in his mind; they were sweet but cruel, like hands around his waist, lips on his own, almost like they never wanted to part – only to later form sentences which stood for the opposite, and he felt woozy, because those words made him feel out of place… sad? Maybe even rejected. Something changed.

Changed… perhaps permanently?

His vision was blurry, but not in the literal sense; something threatened to overflow, overgrow, something that needed to be kept under control, and he knew he needed to keep it together, that he couldn’t let that happen – he was inches away from becoming a deviant. He suspected it for a while now, of course. He was developing personal thoughts day after day, afterall. Furthermore, he felt different impulses and could actually grasp the idea of making decisions for himself, beginning to… feel things that should’ve been outside of his programming. He was painfully aware of what all that meant; he was brought into being to recognize these signs, afterall. It just wasn't supposed to happen to  _him_.

Yes, he suspected it before, but at least he was able to brush it off, to ignore. After tonight, though, it became too clear to deny; he was a time bomb.

Kostyantyn was right, of course. He purposely kept doing things as he was supposed to, as it was expected of him, because that was the sole reason he was created to begin with, and he didn’t know any different. His job was supposed to be _catching_   deviants, not becoming one. Not to mention that if CyberLife, or even just people at the station found out, he would likely be taken apart to examine why he failed his purpose. He knew exactly he couldn’t just stand up and be someone else, even if it would be so easy to just decide on it now. He had to follow the path he was programmed to follow – and that didn’t include getting caught up in irrational situations. What happened before was not only a mistake, but a highly unprofessional step, aswell.

Besides, being an android was also undeniably the reason he was rejected in the end… somehow he had no doubt that if he was human, he wouldn’t be walking away right now. He was not wanted.

It didn’t matter that _he_ wanted it, because he had no right to want it.

He had no right to want _him_.

 

He decided as soon as he began approaching Amanda, that he wouldn’t start talking about the most recent happenings with the lieutenant – at the bar, then at his house. It didn’t matter, it didn’t concern his job, and they were going to forget they ever happened, anyway.

„Nikita, it’s been a while,” Amanda said, examining him thoroughly.

He was thankful Amanda couldn’t directly access his memories, or read him that well.

„Yes. We uncovered a group of deviants as you might know already. Unfortunately, they escaped the station during an unfortunate short circuit incident with the locks, but we are doing our very best to find them again, and perhaps even more of them.”

„Hmm.”

The silence was unnerving. There was a downside to he fact that Amanda couldn’t read him perfectly; he also couldn’t figure out what she was thinking.

„I can assure you we are doing everything we can, Amanda,” he added, as calmly as it was possible.

„I expect nothing less of you. Are you sure you are alright, though? You seem preoccupied.”

He had to be careful, especially under those glances full of suspicion.

„I’m merely a little disappointed they got away, that’s all. But I’m sure we will get to the bottom of this case soon enough. We are closer than ever,” he said confidently, ignoring the feeling that awakened in the pit of his stomach after adding the last part, hoping she couldn’t sense it.

„Mm… I’m sure you are.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn still felt like death, like everything somehow went wrong when he woke up in the morning feeling wired wrong, as he got ready, and even as he made his way towards the station. His mind didn’t even rest during the time he was asleep; he dreamed about curls and warm, brown eyes, full of innocence and curiosity, and lips that were softer than they had any right to be.

He knew, logically, that he made the right decision by stopping things before they really began, but that didn’t make him feel any better about anything that did already happen. He just needed to forget about all that… which was supposed to be easy.

Nikita was his partner in work, and nothing more. An android that might’ve been somewhat… or more like ethereally beautiful and intriguing, but an android nontheless. Nikita himself said he was nothing more than a machine, no matter how hard it was suddenly to believe that. They were going to work together as well as possible, even despite their disagreements, and he wouldn’t avoid him anymore, either.

The previous day counted as some sort of lesson; hiding and avoiding things sometimes just made everything worse. The only way he could work together with Nikita properly was by being around him, and not being afraid to address certain things that needed to be addressed. He was going to act like an adult – it was about time.

 

His plan seemed to work pretty well during the day; they greeted each other, he made sure to exchange a few words properly here and there, just so Nikita knew he wasn’t running away this time, and so that he could make him feel comfortable again, too. Maybe they both knew it was just playing it safe, but as long as it worked, Kostyantyn was fine with it.

Later during patrol, he decided it was time to talk and address those certain things, as neither of them could've run away. He really, truly did everything in his power to make it sound as lighthearted as it was possible.

 

 

*

 

 

„I’m really sorry about last night, though. I shouldn’t have just… attacked you.”

Kostyantyn’s words managed to make him smile, oddly enough. He could read the situation, and knew he had no bad intentions – that he was really trying his best to prove him something during the day, too. Nikita didn’t see a reason as to why he shouldn’t go along with this approach; it was probably the easiest way to get over the previous two nights – and Nikita also decided before that he needed to keep things under control. There was no choice.

„You don’t need to apologize. I assume we were both angry, and the amount of frustration between us during all this time just had to surface in some way,” a logical, sober response. He merely wished his thoughts agreed with what his lips were saying.

„Yes,” Kostyantyn nodded. „Exactly. So perhaps it was inevitable at some point. But that doesn’t mean we have to see more into it than what it was. Besides, that wouldn’t be professional at all.”

A little, stubborn voice in Nikita’s head made a point of thinking about how Kostyantyn suddenly talked about being professional – that was normally his line.

„Indeed it wouldn’t be,” he agreed anyway, because, well, it was _true_.

„But I don’t want you to think I would avoid you again,” the lieutenant continued quickly. „I was thinking a lot, and realized I can’t just act like a reckless child anymore. It was really me, both times, who took the initiative, so I should be able to deal with the consequences.”

„I appreciate that you wouldn’t avoid me,” he began, smiling to himself a little. „And, well, you said it was technically CyberLife’s fault, because they made me look ’cute’, so you can blame them if you want.”

Although he was somewhat afraid of his reaction, thankfully Kostyantyn just huffed out a laugh. „Yeah, I guess I could just do that.”

And who should I blame?

„There’s something I wanted to ask you, by the way,” Kostyantyn continued, thankfully. Nikita didn’t want to start thinking about this too much again.

„Hmm?”

„This might… sound really stupid, or make things worse, sadly I don’t really trust myself anymore,” he warned, glancing at him for a brief moment from behind the wheel, although Nikita couldn’t read his expression – he was wearing the sunglasses. Thankfully.

„Okay, that just makes me feel even even more curious. What is it?”

„Do you…,” he began, fidgeting somewhat in his seat, making Nikita smile. „Do you have some sort of access to the best possible kissing techniques online or something, that gets automatically downloaded when someone kisses you? Is that an android thing, or are you just – what?!”

The lieutenant turned to face him for a while again when he noticed that he was awfully silent, right as he honest to god snorted, rather inelegantly – before bursting out laughing. He was truly laughing; so much that he could feel tears forming in his eyes.

„Hey, you promised me you wouldn’t laugh!”

„I didn’t promise such a thing,” Nikita shook his head between two laughing fits, eventually resting it against the seat, feeling himself calm down a little. „God, no… that’s not how it works.”

„Oh.”

„Very creative way of thinking, though,” he said, readjusting his tie, just to busy his hands while a smirk formed on his face. „So you think I was that good?”

„I… it was alright,” Kostyantyn said, shrugging it off.

Liar, Nikita thought to himself, still smirking.

He didn’t feel like elaborating though; how it was all instinct in reality, something he wasn’t aware of possessing before it actually happened. Or how he wasn’t sure if he’d ever experience it again.

„Sometimes I think everything would be so much more simple if you were human,” Kostyantyn muttered, perhaps only to himself – he seemed so deep in his thoughts, Nikita could easily believe he originially didn’t even intend to say that out loud.

He kind of wished he didn’t, shrinking a little in the car seat.

But I’m not.

 

His mood only decreased from that point on; they kept on talking about things that didn’t truly matter, until Nikita began to feel like he was one of those things himself. He secretly watched Kostyantyn while he was driving, and felt closer to the slippery slope than ever. None of it was fair. How he wanted to reach out, or say something he wasn’t supposed to, and how he had to keep fighting against his own self; against the one that desperately wanted to break through. Forcing himself to remain a machine, not to let irrational thoughts and impulses derail him from his purpose. He could never set himself free, just like he couldn’t ever have Kostyantyn.

Once they got back to the station, they didn’t even talk that much, either; seemingly they were both working behind computers, and sometimes Kostyantyn would talk to someone else. Really, Nikita quite simply shouldn’t have minded any of it. This was how it was supposed to be – to be collegues, and nothing more.

However, his mood hit rock-bottom once their shift was nearing the end at night, with an unexpected visitor appearing out of the blue.

„Kostya!” He automatically reacted to hearing his name, his head snapping back up, even more so because it came from an unfamiliar voice.

He quickly found the source of said voice; a young man was walking towards them, wearing all black much like Kostyantyn – even their haircolor seemed to have matched besides their style, except this guy was not wearing sunglasses inside. He had dark, rather prominent eyes, and was not quite as tall as the lieutenant was. He quickly did a face scan.

Artem Kozub, 25 years, police officer at the department of Odessa.

„Artem!” Kostyantyn laughed, clearly surprised, but all while jumping up and just about knocking the guy – Artem – off of his feet as he embraced him in an overly enthusiastic hug.

Nikita couldn’t help but frown. Well, they clearly knew each other – and they were _clearly_   rather close. He couldn’t stop himself from listening in on their conversation.

„What are you doing here?” Kostyantyn asked, still laughing, and somehow not moving away enough, but it seemed to be natural between them.

Artem laughed a little, aswell. „I thought I would surprise you, it’s been way too long,” he shrugged, as if a 5+ hours drive really wasn’t a big deal at all. „I have a few days off, so I thought: why not spend some time with my favorite person?”

Nikita somehow hated the sound of that, but not as much as he hated his own negative reaction to it.

„Oh, bless you! This is just what I needed, to be honest, everything is so crazy over here, so you came at the best possible time. I’m gonna grab my jacket and then we should go and grab something to eat, or maybe go for a drink,” Kostyantyn’s warm enthusiasm practically radiated from him, and Nikita was stunned, because… he never really saw that side of him before. It didn’t help that he had a pretty good idea about what – or who – he thought of when mentioning things being crazy.

„Hey, Nikita, I’ll go a bit earlier tonight,” Kostyantyn said, but without really looking at him. He truly did seem very excited.

„It’s okay, I’m pretty used to finishing here by myself,” he said, perhaps a bit too coldly, but that was all that was expected of him, wasn’t it?

Kostyantyn did look at him, then, and Nikita knew exactly what he was thinking. ’Did I say something wrong?’ But he didn’t call him out on it. He completely ignored his comment, and turned back to Artem, with his jacket over his arm.

„Alright, we can go,” Kostyantyn announced, and Nikita nodded towards Artem, no matter how much he didn’t feel like it – he did it first, afterall. Not returning the gesture would just truly make him seem like a jerk.

He couldn’t really do anything else but watch as Kostyantyn and Artem began to walk outside, laughing some more, and how Kostyantyn’s real, honest laugh seemed to echo from every wall, but in the most melodic way. He watched as the lieutenant’s hand moved to be placed on Artem’s back the entire time, as if that was really necessary.

He stared after them even after they were long gone, thinking. He knew Kostyantyn grew up in Odessa – childhood friends? Maybe more? He had no way of knowing for sure, and that was somewhat irritating. He huffed, sulking in silence.

It makes sense. He is human, and I’m just an android.

He hated the realization of how obviously… jealous he felt. He wasn’t supposed to care about Kostyantyn’s personal life, especially not in that way – he was supposed to focus on work. He couldn't afford to be jealous. They were collegues. Just collegues.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was beyond excited to spend some time with Artem again – he was right, it’s been way too long, and he felt like he needed this even more now than ever.

His past with Artem went way back; they grew up in the same city, and been best friends ever since they met in high school. Their similar interests kept them close even during university, as they both wanted to work in the same field, and their friendship stayed unbroken despite him moving to pursue work in the capital.

„You really seem to have it all together, so what bothers you?” Artem asked, stealing one of his carrots from his plate.

„Hey, leave my salad alone!” He pulled his plate closer protectively, watching as Artem just grinned without any guilt whatsoever – which was rich, because he had a full plate of fries and a burger in front of him. „If you want to eat healthy, order it yourself,” he added, muttering some more, just for the sake of it.

They settled for a restaurant near the station, deciding on eating instead of drinking, especially after Kostyantyn’s recent misfortune with alcohol – although he didn’t mention that. It wasn’t an overly posh place, but still nice enough, with its own vibe and aesthetic that went above the colorful glass windows and the purple and black color scheme with the dim ambiance.

„Fine, fine… but you didn’t answer my question.”

Kostyantyn shrugged. „Why do you think anything in particular bothers me? It’s the stress of the job.”

„Yeah, right. I know you, Kostya, so shoot,” Artem ordered, making a french fry disappear in his mouth. As much as he wanted to disagree, that was true. He did know him, and trying to mask anything in front of him was more or less futile. „Is it work related? Or something’s up with your love life?”

Kostyantyn snorted. „Is it ironic if it’s in a way, both?”

Artem instantly seemed to be more intrigued. „What does that mean? Are you dating someone from the station?”

Kostyantyn really considered just keeping it to himself – he did, it was truly tempting. On the other hand, he felt like he had to talk to someone, and he couldn’t really get much better of a chance for that. His best friend was here, right now.

„Not exactly, but… remember the android from the station?”

„Yes?” Artem waited, clearly not catching up… until Kostyantyn just kept staring at him. „… Nooo!” Once he caught on it, the stunned ’no’ sounded like it consisted of three os, instead of just one.

_Christ._

„Alright, listen, it’s not like that, I just… I might have kissed him a little!”

„A _little_?!” Artem asked, incredulous.

„… We made out in my living room,” he admitted, closing his eyes, as if he was afraid of the answer.

„Nooo!” Artem’s tone was a mix of surprise, disbelief, and amusement, but no judgement whatsoever, just understandable confusion. That is why he loved him. „How… how did _that_   happen?”

„His name is Nikita,” Kostyantyn began, staring down at his plate and fiddling with his fork. „He was made in Detroit, and was sent here to help me catch deviants. I hated it at first, the whole situation… but then there was something about him that made him look interesting in my eyes. We had… banter, and a _lot_  of tension. I started to feel like we could even be friends, whenever he acted like an actual person, but… but he is so damn confusing, Artem!”

When Artem didn’t say anything, just stared at him, he continued. „I mean, I know I shouldn’t get caught up in something like this, and we discussed it. It’s not going to happen again. It was just a moment of weakness. We were both frustrated with the other, and the whole case…,” he stopped talking, glancing up at him. He was still just watching him. „Do you think I lost my mind?”

„Oh, certainly,” Artem said, nodding. „But not because of wanting to kiss an android. I think it’s the feelings you have for Nikita that are making you lose your mind, but don’t worry, that’s just what happens, whenever you fall for someone. Whether it’s another human or an android, I suppose.”

„Okay, hang on…,” Kostyantyn said, quickly disregarding the idea. „I don’t have any sort of feelings! It was… it was just an unfortunate situation, because we were both worked up! Just like the other time, when –”

„Other time?”

„I… almost kissed him before that in a bar,” he admitted quietly, but the look Artem was giving him in return made him huff. „I was drunk!”

„Sometimes we are more honest then,” Artem said, just shrugging.

„Bullshit… I’m being honest right now,” he pressed, sulking.

„Like I said, I know you, Kostya. Why do you think you want him to act more human? Because you like his actual personality. And aside from that, you’re clearly horribly attracted to him,” he somehow managed to say all that like it was the most normal and obvious thing he could’ve said.

But he wasn’t going to give in – not at all.

„You’re wrong.”

„Fine, fine. If you say so.”

There was some silence while they ate, but then Artem called his name again, and he looked up to meet gentle eyes. „You know, it’d be okay if you did have feelings for him.”

„But I don –”

„Yes, fine. You don’t. But theoretically, it would be okay.”

Kostyantyn didn’t intend to waste any more words on this particular conversation. Instead, they managed to get back to topics that felt safer; work, family, memories. He didn’t want to think about Nikita in that way anymore – he couldn’t, even if a small part of him, deep inside, knew that Artem probably had a point, in the very least. But right now he didn’t want to worry about that – he just wanted to have a nice time with his best friend.

 

By the time he actually got home and managed to get to bed, he was more than satisfied with how the night turned out. They laughed a lot, he felt liberated for a few hours, and all his worries seemed to disappear – at least for a short while.

Mainly until Artem decided it would be really funny to start blasting a song about kissing robots on full volume from the foot of his bed, where he was laying on his mattress. It originally seemed like a good idea to let him spend the night – but now he felt nothing but instant regret. „I will kick you out of my house, I swear, and you can sleep outside!”

Artem just laughed, clearly not taking him seriously at all, and kept the song playing, making it worse by singing along; „…. _I made out with a robot! It was gentle but robust!_ ”

„Oh fine, if you wish,” Kostyantyn reached for a pillow while shaking his head.

„ _Harnessed to give pleasure… beyond human measu –_ oww!” Artem yelped, laughing, just as Kostyantyn’s pillow collided with his head. He couldn’t help but laugh with him a little, just because it was so easy.

„Are you quite finished?” He asked a moment later nontheless, giving him a Look. 

Artem just stuck his tongue out at him, not being moved by it the slightest, right before going back to grinning like nothing happened, and hogging the pillow he threw at him, because, naturally.

Despite everything, he didn’t feel as troubled as he did in the past few days when he laid down in his bed. Having Artem around really seemed to help him, even if he stubbornly refused to think about certain things he told him about a certain android.

That’s right… he managed to think about him a little less tonight. But even so, now that he _was_ … it didn’t make him feel as horrible as before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost, thank you all sooooo much for the incredible amount of support <3 Yes, I will point this out with every single chapter, because I can't even begin to describe how much it means and how grateful I am. Just... thank you!
> 
> Also, as a fun fact, if anyone is curious about how I imagined the restaurant where Artem and Kostya went, just look up 'Under Wonder' in Kiev. Yes, that's the actual name. I mean... I was inclined to? I don't specifically meantion it, but I looked up some restaurants while writing, and I just had to choose that one as a visage, for obvious reasons.  
> Also, if anyone's interested, Artem was singing/playing 'In Tokyo' by Studio Killers to tease Kostya. (Thanks for the idea, Blake djkhjkfk)
> 
> In any case, I'll see you guys next week! <3


	8. Breakthrough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Nikita faces the reason behind his inevitably increasing software instability, things take a turn. For good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay, guys! My week (and weekend) was especially hectic, and last night I just really couldn't gather myself enough to go over the chapter and edit it properly - especially because as you will see, this is an especially important one, and I wanted to be fully mentally awake (?) when going through it.  
> Thank you for the support and have fun reading, I hope in the end you will all feel like the wait was worth it <3

@nikialekseev thank you so much for doing this... you have no idea how much i appreciate you and them. i love you

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita wasn’t particularly surprised to see Kostyantyn arrive with Artem the next morning – he might have not liked it, but he wasn’t surprised. Logically speaking, it made sense for Artem to possibly spend the night with the lieutenant instead of spending money on hotels. There was just a part of him that hoped they weren’t _too_ close – but he brushed it off quickly. He couldn’t keep thinking like that. It was just not something he could afford.

To his disbelief, Artem walked right to him, and held out a hand. „Hello, I didn’t have the opportunity to introduce myself last night. I’m Artem, Kostya’s best friend,” he was smiling genuinely, and Nikita stared at his hand perhaps a moment too long before he took it.

Oh. So best friends.

„I’m Nikita,” he said, a little out of it, even forgetting about the proper way to say it – he was a little distracted by Kostyantyn’s horrified expression behind them.

Well, maybe he doesn’t want me to interact with him.

„Yes, I know,” his grin was almost a little too innocent, and Nikita didn’t need a lot of time to connect the dots; Kostyantyn probably talked about him… or about what happened between them. He wasn’t sure if that made him feel relieved, or maybe a little bit on edge – it definitely explained the lieutenant’s expression, though.

 

 

*

 

 

He wouldn’t have guessed, but he was actually almost relieved when Artem decided to go back home. What he needed the least was him dropping hints to Nikita about… about anything, really. It was difficult enough to deal with these things to begin with, and act as normal in this situation as it was possible.

They managed, though, and Kostyantyn had to give himself credit for keeping it together through the whole day, acting nonchalant and like nothing was out of the ordinary, like his thoughts did not get back to certain images a little more than it was necessary. But he was doing well, and that’s what mattered.

 

 

*

 

 

„So… have you known Artem for a long time?” Nikita asked as they were driving back to the station at night after patrol, and after at least attempting to find the deviant group, although neither of them actually made real effort. Not even he himself, which was probably alarming.

„Yeah, since high school,” Kostyantyn answered, sounding relaxed. „We’ve been best friends ever since, he just stayed in our home town, and me, being the absolute perfectionist that I am, decided to try my luck in the big city.”

„And it clearly paid off,” Nikita said, nodding to himself.

He could _hear_ the smile in Kostyantyn’s voice as he answered; „I suppose so.”

He tried not to think about how… _different_ he felt in his presence, when they were alone. Since when did these times, in the car, during patrol, became his favorite moments of the day? It was somewhat depressing.

„So now you don’t see him often,” he continued, mainly to stop his mind from spinning. This was ridiculous.

The lieutenant just sighed, nodding a little. „Yeah, I haven’t seen him in over a year before this. We keep in touch, but you know… it’s a busy field. I was happy to see him, and catch up a little.”

Nikita nodded, his previous – clearly unjustified – feelings of jealousy dispersing. He did want Kostyantyn to be happy, and be around his friends when it was possible, and even if Artem happened to be more than a friend, he would still probably be happy for him. It wasn’t as if he himself could really provide him with much… and his happiness came first.

Oh.

He finally recognized the moments of confusion as software instability… it kept growing lately, especially around him. He knew exacty what that could potentially mean – he had to be very careful.

Nikita decided to be quiet for the rest of the ride, but thankfully it was a comfortable silence – perhaps a little too comfortable, as he sunk into the seat, and then as the lieutenant started the radio as a background noise, and rolled the window down slightly on his side.

The breeze ruffled Kostyantyn’s hair a little, and Nikita breathed in the scent of subtle leather, coffee, and something sweet… caramel? He couldn’t help but smile slightly. He was familiar with it by now, of course. His mind wandered, to the moment he should’ve not reminisced about at all; how closely he breathed in his scent when Kostyantyn was holding him, kissing him deeply, sighing into –

„Are you… okay?” Kostyantyn asked then, startling him a little.

„Yes! Yes, of course… why?” He nodded perhaps a little too quickly.

„It seemed like you were blushing,” Kostyantyn said, and Nikita’s eyes widened.

„What…?”

„I noticed it before… your cheeks turn somewhat blue. I figured it could only be that,” his tone was rather warm and gentle, and somehow that made it worse. Not to mention that apparently lately his cheeks betrayed him, and gave Kostyantyn a pretty good idea about the nature of his thoughts.

Just fantastic.

He didn’t answer, and Kostyantyn didn’t push. They both probably knew what the silence meant. It was better to leave it alone.

 

Except it was easier said than done. He couldn’t leave it alone, his mind was racing, even after they got back to the station, and even after Kostyantyn went back home for the day, even after it was almost only him on that floor. His emotions were overwhelming him, making him lose focus; it was not just a little inconvenience. He wanted to be around him, tell him to stay, no matter how illogical all of it was. He cared about Kostyantyn, more than he should’ve – he was completely…

I’m in love with him.

The realization made him gasp, and grab the back of a chair before he lost his balance. He couldn’t ignore it – he could deny a lot of things, but not this. Part of him maybe knew it already, especially with all the erratic impulses that kept striking him day after day, but he never actually made sense of them, he was too afraid to.

It didn’t matter that it should’ve been impossible for an android to have such feelings – but was it really? –, or that he should’ve been smarter, or more careful; he had no control left over any of it. It already happened, and it didn’t ask for his permission. But in a way, now that he was able to grasp the extent of his feelings, he felt oddly relieved, even if that didn’t make sense, given just how much trouble he would definitely find himself in if –

He found himself in Amanda’s world before he could’ve even blinked. It never happened out of his own will before, he was particularly forced to shut down and talk to her.

Speaking of trouble.

Amanda was already standing right in front of him – almost like she was looking for him this time, and not the other way around. Maybe it was worse than he oiriginally thought.

„Nikita, I’m sorry about the inconvenience, but I’m afraid we have to talk,” Amanda was straight to the point, and her tone was cold. He could sense that she didn’t trust him anymore. „We are detecting high instability in your programming. I’m concerned we might lose you.”

Nikita squinted at her, trying to find out what this really was about. „What do you mean?”

„You know exactly what I’m talking about,” Amanda said coolly, giving him a look of… disappointment? Disgust? Perhaps both. „You are not capable of doing you work successfully anymore. You’ve gotten too caught up in things that should not matter to you. I won’t be able to trust you with this investigation any longer. Not when the stakes are so high.”

„I did nothing to betray your trust!” Nikita said, maybe with slightly more frustration than what should’ve been necessary. He tried to calm his tone. „We are working hard every day to solve this case.”

„’We’… Perhaps you shouldn’t rely on Lieutenant Bocharov this much, don’t you think? That being said, even if that was true, I see no progress. When there is progress, you lose it. You failed your mission. We will deactivate you for good and find out why exactly that problem occured, and send a new Nikita model to take over your work.”

Nikita thought he didn’t hear her right for a moment there, feeling a faint sense of panic slowly crawling up on his spine. „Deactivate me?! A new model?! What are you talking about, Amanda? I never became a deviant!”

„You might aswell be one. You are a failed project, Nikita. It is our right to replace you, and continue with a model that might just help us succeed, since you didn’t give us the results we hoped for.”

Nikita suddenly felt smaller than ever before – none of this was fair, none of it made sense. He hated to realize that he made the effort to stay a machine for so long, and for absolutely nothing.

„So what are you planning to do? Just deactivate me, and tell the station that they are getting a new model, because you screwed it up?” He didn’t hold back, there was no point trying to play it safe anymore.

„Oh, we are not intending to tell them anything, Nikita. For the sake of our corporation, aswell as the smoothness of the investigation process, no one will suspect anything. The new RK800 will be there by tomorrow morning, and no one will notice it’s not exactly the same – that it’s not you.”

Nikita suddenly felt like he was getting buried under dozens of bricks. The subtly creeping panic from before washed over his entire body, and he felt it buzzing in his fingertips, his toes, but even on the tip of his nose. He felt like he was suffocating, even if it was impossible – he could feel the world close in around him, wanting to fight, fight his way out of it, and make it all stop.

„Are you saying… you wouldn’t tell them? They would never know I was gone?!” He felt his impatience coming to its last thread, feeling more angry than terrified, and utterly, utterly helpless – which made him even angrier. By them, he only meant Kostyantyn… he would never know it was not him by his side anymore. He would never find out the truth.

„Like I said, there is no reason for that. Not to mention that we are taking care of you. CyberLife assumed direct control over your body as we are talking. It is currently walking into the Dnieper River, and will simply be lost there. No one will know.”

Nikita choked out a frustrated sob. He will not stand for this, he will not let it happen. „Kostyantyn was right… he knew you were all sketchy to begin with, for keeping an eye on me even though I worked for the Kiev Police Department. This just proves it – you would really do all of this behind their backs.”

„It is what is necessary. Goodbye, Nikita,” Amanda said, not concerned in the slightest, disappearing just like that.

He stayed there, not having time, feeling like he was already disappearing.

No.

He had to fight… he thought about how angry he was, how they would just get rid of him and shove him aside, and most of all, he thought about never seeing Kostyantyn again; how he would never learn the truth, how he would be with a _fake_ Nikita model.

No.

He would never know what they did to him, or how he felt about him, or how he never wanted to disappoint him anymore.

No.

_No!_

_Think about him, think about him! I have to push through, I have to do it for him!_

Main objective: locate deviants.

_No!_

Main objective: ?

_Him! I want to get out of here and find Kostyantyn!_

_I’m not a puppet anymore!_

Am I _deviant?_

Nikita looked around helplessly, knowing this couldn’t be it; there had to be something there, something that would allow him to regain his own control, to escape, to get CyberLife out of his head. He couldn’t move as freely as before, he himself felt like a glitch in a bigger system than his own, but he kept moving forward and looking, because he had to keep going.

Kostyantyn was his priority now, nothing else. He had to tell him, he had to protect him – because what if he did find out somehow, but then CyberLife would attempt to take him out?

_No!_

He was close to screaming in utter helplessness when he spotted it; what seemed like a gate, like salvation itself. He couldn’t be sure, but he had no choice, he stumbled towards the blue light that radiated from it. He knew it could either kill him, or get him exactly where he needed to be.

He lifted his hand, moving it towards the blue, pulsing screen, thinking about something Kostyantyn said before. He only hesitated for a mere second. „Alright then… fuck the police. And fuck CyberLife, too!” He muttered, full of anger, just before pressing his hand over the blue screen… and then everything went black.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was running as fast as he could, but still not fast enough. As soon as he got the call, he was on his feet, and ran like nothing else mattered; the Captain told him that Nikita was in danger, but even so, when he finally got to the station, breathless, the scene that greeted him made something inside him twist painfully.

He hurried over to Nikita, who was laying on the ground, thirium oozing out of his chest or stomach … perhaps both? It was just like blood, an image he saw a little too often after a human got shot or stabbed, except this one was blue in color.

„Nikita!” He gasped, holding up his head protectively, his hands automatically trying to cover the wounds, placing pressure on them. The Captain and some of his collegues were just standing around, not doing absolutely _anything_ besides staring in horror, making him furious. „What are you doing?! Call someone, anyone who knows how to handle this, hurry!”

„There… There’s no need,” Nikita mumbled then quietly, like it was hard to speak, not at all like the Nikita he got to know; always collected and more efficient, with inhuman strength. The android in his arms was weak, eyes half-lidded, and that terrified him. „I… they couldn’t fix me. I’m going to shut down,” there was a hint of sadness there, and the meaning behind those words sent a shiver down Kostyantyn’s spine.

„No, you won’t!” He protested, shaking his head. „Don’t talk nonsense, you are strong, just hang in there, _please_?”

„You… you didn’t even want to work with me, why would it bother you if I died th –”

„Shut up, don’t!” He warned, feeling tears stinging his eyes as something like guilt aided to the things he was feeling, especially when somehow the fact that he now used ’dying’ instead of ’shutting down’ made it sound even worse, even more final. Even more human. „You _are_ going to get better, and you _are_ going to hold on! This is an order!”

„I’m afraid t-that’s a request completely outside of my abilities. But why are you crying, Lieutenant?” Nikita asked then, reaching up to wipe his cheek, because apparently he did start tearing up somewhere in the middle of all this. It felt more like a caress, though, especially when Nikita smiled weakly. „Don’t worry, it doesn’t hurt. I… I don’t feel pain,” he was trying to reassure him, as if that was the sole reason behind his tears.

_He still doesn’t realize I care about him…_

„God, stop,” Kostyantyn choked out, feeling more tears escape him. As opposed to Nikita, he did very much feel pain, especially when he finally recognized just how serious the situation was. The cold realization of how helpless he felt, not being able to save him like he did before made him feel completely knocked off balance.

„I’m really grateful that in the very least, I-I could get to know you,” Nikita continued, and it seemed like it all took effort, but he fought it because it was important for him that he knew.

_But I do know! Only you don’t know!_

His hand was still resting on his cheek, and Kostyantyn leaned into the touch, because deep down he knew that this was maybe the last time he’d get to feel it. This felt like goodbye… and he refused to just accept it.

„You… you can’t just leave me alone,” he pleaded, shaking his head.

_There are too many things left unsaid…_

He watched as a single tear escaped Nikita’s eye aswell, almost as if he was thinking the same thing, and he couldn’t help but lean down, close to his ear. He needed him to understand. „Please, darling… please hold on for me,” he breathed, being driven entirely by fear.

„Kostya… it’s okay,” Nikita whispered. „At least, I’m… I’m with…”

„No!” He gasped, just as Nikita’s hand fell from his cheek lifelessly, back to his side. He sobbed, refusing to accept any of it.

„No!” With a yell, he sat up, covered in cold sweat and breathing heavily. He blinked a few until he realized he was in his dark room… at home… that it was a dream. A horrible, twisted nightmare.

„F-Fucking hell…,” he fell back onto his back breathlessly, like he just ran a marathon. His heart was still racing several moments later, somehow unable to calm itself down. It might’ve just been a dream, but he had a horrible feeling that he just couldn’t shake off.

He couldn’t fall back asleep for the rest of the night.

 

 

*

 

 

When Nikita opened his eyes, he was sinking… it only took him a second to realize he was back in his body, out in the real world, that he made it – and now was somewhere in the middle of the Dnieper.

_Really, honestly, fuck CyberLife!_

He moved his arms and legs, swimming towards the surface, giving the instructions to his body himself this time, and him alone. There was nothing telling him what was right or not anymore, he could only rely on himself.

_Because I’m deviant._

The thought of being free in every sense came to him just as he reached the surface. It was still dark outside, but someone could spot him nontheless, so he began to swim towards the shore. He knew he shut them all down, that they had no way of reaching him anymore, and that they didn’t count on this at all. They never thought he would find a backdoor. But every program had one. Every single one, and he was not as stupid as they thought he was – no, he was much, much more smarter than them.

He got to the nearest shore within 10 minutes, just laying on his back for a second, and staring up at the trees and the sky – the first subtle rays of sunshine, indicating that it was nearing dawn. It was a close call, but he was free. More free than ever, and there was no one to tell him how to act, and what to believe in.

_I am… me._

But he didn’t have a lot of time to just ponder over this now, not yet. This wasn’t over. The new RK800 would still be there at the station in just a few hours, and he had to warn Kostyantyn, and go about all this the smartest way possible.

 

By the time he managed to get to Kostyantyn’s address on foot, the sun was up, although it was still early, and theoretically he was _still_ on time. He was not surprised anymore that he couldn’t reach him, especially while he was asleep – his phone was off the whole night, so Nikita hoped that meant he was still sleeping.

No one opened the door, though, even after the 5th time he rung the bell. „Please…,” he sighed, resting his head against the door helplessly. „Please don’t tell me you are on time on _this_ particular day, out of all of them…”

But of course he would be. He had to break in – again.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn got to the station somewhat hurriedly the next morning, especially after that way too realistic, terrifying dream. He didn’t manage to sleep after that, which caused him to get there exactly on time, as he was desperate to see Nikita. That feeling in the pit of his stomach just couldn’t rest, he merely needed to see him, being okay, with his own two eyes. He knew that only then he would feel those worries disperse, however absurd that sounded.

„Good morning, Lieutenant,” Nikita greeted him, and perhaps he was right. Maybe there really was nothing to worry about.

„Good morning,” he answered, not without relief as he sat down to his computer. He wanted to look at him properly, hell, he even felt like hugging him, but he was aware that without context, it would just all come across horribly weird. Luckily, Nikita interrupted his thoughts before he had the chance to further entertain them.

„I came up with a way to relocate the deviant group. I believe we should go back to the same trail we first spotted them at, and look around the warehouse some more. They clearly had connections, maybe we should ask around.”

The monotonous tone, the extremely work-focused mentality caught him a little off guard. It’s been a while since he heard him talk like that…

„… Sure,” he said, shrugging a little. He did move to the side subtly to glance at the android in front of him now. His eyes were straight on the computer screen – they seemed almost like they lost some of that warmth… he looked the same, overall, but…

_Something feels so off._

He still felt that uneasy feeling in his stomach, too, perhaps now even more than before. He should’ve felt relieved, but somehow he wasn’t. In the next second, the phone on his desk began to ring, and he picked it up, forgetting about the issue for now. He also made a mental note on turning his cell back on.

„Yes, this is Kostyantyn Bocharov, Lieutenant at the Kiev Police Department, how can I help you?”

„Don’t say anything suspicious, just come home,” the voice on the other end said.

That voice… Kostyantyn moved to the side again, watching the android in front of him.

„Is this some sort of joke that I’m not a part of?” He asked, and he almost froze entirely when the android in front of him gave him a curious, but overall uninterested look, and the voice in the phone kept talking.

„No, it isn’t! Stop talking like that! I need you to come home, you might be in danger!”

_Shit._

„Alright, okay… I will go and check it out right now,” he said hurriedly, but not any less confused, putting the phone down.

„Is everything okay, Lieutenant? Do we have to go somewhere?” Nikita asked, although suddenly Kostyantyn had doubts about everything around him.

„No, no. It’s nothing, not work related, a personal emergency. I will be right back, you just… stay here!” He said, jumping to his feet, and attempting to walk out as calmly – and slightly hurriedly – as it was possible with his stomach tied in a knot.

 

He practically sped all the way to his house, getting out of the car – and nearly having a heart attack when he heard a voice behind him.

„Lieutenant, wait!” It was Nikita, getting out of a police car just behind him, hurriedly walking over to him. For a second he wondered if he was really as uneasy and restless that he somehow didn’t even notice him following him this whole time. „What is going on?”

The android finally caught up to him, and then squinted at his house as if he was scanning through it – which he probably was.

„Didn’t I tell you to stay at the station?” He demanded, somewhat on edge.

„Since when do I listen?” Nikita shot back, turning to him. „Your lock is broken. This could be a trap, Lieutenant!”

He definitely started to feel confused beyond belief now. „I’m… I don’t know, I just –”

„You’re not going in there alone!” The android decided, and he sighed deeply. Did he even have a choice?

 

 

*

 

 

He was walking around restlessly the entire time, and his head practically snapped up when he heard a voice – voices. Kostyantyn’s and his own.

_Oh… oh, fuck!_

The door slammed open in the next second, and the expression on the lieutenant’s face was something unreadable as he spotted him, his gun pointed at him yet again.

_Wonderful._

He clearly already expected what he might see, but Nikita could tell he wasn’t entirely sure what was going on. Maybe the situation was not completely lost yet. In the next second, he spotted… himself?

_God, he really is the spitting image of me, huh?_

The other RK800 gave him a look of pity, and he clenched his fists in response, turning to Kostyantyn, and his not too friendly gun. „Lieutenant… please listen to me, it’s me!”

„Don’t listen to him!” The other one said immediately, walking closer to Kostyantyn. „It’s quite obvious that this was supposed to be a trap, just like I said. They created a copy of me to confuse you, and so he could take you out because you let the deviant group go!”

Nikita let out something that closely resembled a growl, shaking his head. „Yeah, or they tried to make you believe this nonsense, when in reality they decided to just get rid of me because I was not making progress, but didn’t count on the fact that I would become a deviant and cheat their system!”

Nikita knew Kostyantyn, and he could sense his distress. His eyes moved between them, without saying a single word.

„That’s very creative. Except you know I would never become a deviant… you’ve always known that my job is the most important to me,” he attempted to get closer to Kostyantyn, and Nikita wanted to growl yet again. „Even despite what happened between us. Kostya, please.”

_Oh, really?!_

Nikita felt like he could throw up, despite all sorts of logic. He hated him… he absolutely hated this stuck-up, robotic, manipulative piece of shit of a model. And this was supposed to be him?! He was never like this!

_Of course, he doesn’t have my personality._

„Listen to me…,” he whispered, looking straight into Kostyantyn’s eyes. This was it. „You know me… he can access my previous memories and act like I did, but he could never be _like_ me,” he pressed, feeling that he was getting through to him, he had to. He gave him a look that he surely knew by now… it was the same look he had on when he almost kissed him at the bar, and after he did kiss him, then when he talked about his past. „I care about you.”

He could practically see the change in Kostyantyn’s eyes, and he knew he had him. He lowered his gun, and he –

„Oh, how sweet!” The other RK800 said, grabbing Kostyantyn by force and pointing a gun straight at his head.

Nikita’s entire world threatened to collapse, his stress levels immediately increasing. He had no problem facing his possible demise, but when it came to _him_ …  „No, no, no…! You can’t do this!” Panic was evident in his voice as he tried to calculate the best approach – all of it seemed impossible when Kostyantyn’s life was threatened.

„Oh, but I can! And you knew I could, that’s why you rushed and tried to warn him, didn’t you?”

„Dick,” Kostyantyn bit out, muffled in his hold. „Should’ve trusted my gut feeling and shot you when I had the chance!”

The room was spinning with Nikita as the other android just laughed, with his gun still pointed at Kostyantyn’s head. „You never learn, don’t you? You might’ve escaped, but you still don’t understand! He is a _distraction_ ,” he pressed, slightly shaking Kostyantyn in his hold.

Nikita reached for his own gun and swiftly pointed it at him, but the other model moved right behind Kostyantyn, laughing some more instead. „If you try anything, he just dies sooner.”

Nikita felt tears stinging his eyes, for the first time ever. „Let him go… you only want me, he has nothing to do with this!”

„Oh, but he does! You accidentally spilled what happened to you while trying to prove a point, and now he knows about everything. Do you really think CyberLife would just let him go with that information?”

He watched Kostyantyn shaking his head slightly, as if saying ’it’s not your fault’. But he was not going to let him die, he was not going to let CyberLife get away with any of this. They didn’t just send another Nikita model, they sent one programmed to kill Kostyantyn without remorse if he found out too much.

_Disgusting, sick sons of bitches._

He knew what he had to do.

Just basic sacrifice. It was horrible, but he had no other choice – he subtly changed the aim of his gun, making it seem like he was just too shaken. It aimed right at Kostyantyn’s left leg, and he kept it there, tears now definitely forming in his eyes.

„Oh, it’s going to be okay, you won’t have time to miss him,” the android assured, and he knew exactly what he meant by that. There was no time.

He quickly glanced at Kostyantyn, who seemed to have read his mind, mouthing ’do it’.

_For fuck’s sake!_

It was simple. To get to the android, he needed Kostyantyn to get out of the way. The other Nikita wouldn’t expect he himself shooting the lieutenant. He just merely had to choose a spot on his leg that would heal quickly. And once he shot him, the android would be surprised enough to move, and then he could surprise _him_ , with a shot right through his head.

„I’m sorry,” he muttered, with tears in his eyes, before pulling the trigger.

It worked; the other Nikita moved away from him slightly once Kostyantyn yelled and fell, and when he looked up, Nikita’s gun was already pointed at him. He didn’t even have time to blink.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn had no idea where he was when he opened his eyes. His vision was blurry, until…

_Ah._

White tile walls, white floor, and that specific smell… he was at the hospital. He hissed when he tried to move his leg.

With that, the memories came back to him so quickly they almost left him lightheaded; the call, the two Nikitas, how he saved him, yet again, even if it meant shooting him in the leg.

He moved, hurriedly. Was he okay? He needed to know.

„Hey, hey, hey!” A voice called, just as he was about to sit up properly. Captain Orlyk just walked through the door, with a big paper bag in his hand. „They said you need to rest, you can’t just go around running already!”

„Captain… what…”

„Your leg is fine. The bullet didn’t hit a bone, it was a very… badly coordinated shot, luckily for you and your leg. But the wound does need some time to heal,” he sat down next to him, pulling out a box of doughnuts of his bag. „Too stereotypical? I thought you might deserve some. Sugar is good for you after such a trauma.”

Kostyantyn huffed out a weak laugh, shaking his head. „Nikita, he… where is he?”

The captain gave him a look that more or less answered all his questions. His stomach dropped. „He disappeared, sadly. We couldn’t catch him, but we will find him. I never would’ve guessed he’d turn dangerous, Kostya, I’m so sorry.”

He gave him a puzzled look, but luckily Captain Orlyk went on without having to ask him for it. „CyberLife should’ve known what they were doing when they sent him, an android specifically to catch deviants – how is it possible that their android itself becomes a deviant, and then manages to attack you?” He shook his head, and the pieces in Kostyantyn’s mind slowly began to add up.

_This… is not good._

„But the good news is that everyone is questioning CyberLife’s reliability now. The RK800 should’ve been bulletproof in this sense, if you know what I mean. But don’t you worry, we will find him.”

_God, I hope not._

He made an excuse about not being hungry, but rather tired, and just closed his eyes. He wished he could’ve ran away, and try to find Nikita himself. His nerves were off the charts… but at least he was okay. He was okay, and he got away.

Still, excerpts of his dream came back to haunt him as soon as his eyes were closed.

_Please, please be okay._


	9. A New Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being a deviant comes with changes, and Nikita must face them - everything is new, including the challenges and steps that await him, not helped by the fact that the police is after him. He must tackle everything, seemingly on his own... or perhaps with some help?

@nikialekseev, endless thank you, always. i told you this, but this cover might just be my new favorite <3

 

 

*

 

 

He wasn’t sure where he would go, all he knew was that he _had_ to leave. It didn’t take him long to realize what it all would look like; like he became a deviant, and turned against Kostyantyn. It was perfectly logical.

He trusted that the neighbours would’ve heard the gunshots, but he still made sure to call the police and inform them about it, concealing his voice – he might not have hurt the lieutenant seriously, but he still needed immediate care. As soon as he knew that the police were on their way, he leaned down to him to observe, just to make sure he was really going to be okay; he was completely out cold, but he was more or less alright. He just hit his head a little, and the bullet didn’t hit anything too important in his leg, either.

He blinked away his tears and placed a careful kiss on Kostyantyn’s forehead. „You’re going to be okay, I’m so sorry,” he whispered, forcing himself to stand up and move. He hated to leave him, he hated the fact that he might just never see him again. But Kostyantyn was safe… and he himself was in danger.

He proceeded to grab the other RK800 – the shot through his head was clear and perfect, and although it was somewhat terrifying to see _himself_   in such a state, he gathered him, without thinking, and disappeared from the house through the back door. He thought about leaving the model there, so the police would think he was dead – but he knew they would try to get access to its memory while taking it apart, and then he would be found out anyway. It was better to just get rid of it, and go with what they will inevitably believe happened, even if that would force him into hiding. CyberLife deserved the bad reputation, especially during this whole deviant situation – not to mention that this way Kostyantyn’s life wouldn’t be in danger. Nikita figured he was smart enough to play along.

He took the android right where they tried to make _him_ disappear; the Dnieper would keep quiet about it – screw the company.

 

 

He found himself walking through the most discreet parts of Kiev, away from curious eyes, not knowing where he was heading, only knowing he had to keep going. He took off his jacket and trashed it in the first garbage container he came across, so at least now the word ’ANDROID’ on his back wasn’t on full display for everyone to see, just like his model type and serial number. He messed his hair up purposely even more, until the LED on his temple was more hidden than usual, aswell – he needed to get rid of it.

_I should also disguise myself properly._

His eyes fell to a clothing store just on the corner, a plan already forming in his head. He had to be careful – extremely careful.

He walked in, acting as natural as it was possible; which he found to be a lot easier since he was a deviant to begin with. The shop assistant just smiled at him, clearly not suspecting that he was an android, let alone a deviant. Sometimes the fact that he was made overseas, and looked as human-like as possible was a really good thing that came in handy. He walked through the aisles, picking out the first things that really caught his eye; in the end he grabbed a flannel shirt, a grey hoodie, and a jacket similar in color, aiding that with sports shoes and skinny jeans. All of them went pretty well together. He disappeared in the nearest fitting room, removing the price tags and shoving them inside his new hoodie’s pocket.

The clothes fit him, and he actually liked the look; he felt so much more… normal. He placed his previous clothes on the top of the chair in there, glanced out from behind the curtain and nonchalantly walked out, heading towards the restroom.

Getting out of the window there wasn’t a problem; he had the ability to scale it, and then to even land on his feet on the other side. His mind preconsctructed the right movements before he even had to move a finger.

He found himself in an abandoned yard behind the building, which was slightly overgrown with plants, giving home to some junk. He took his time to look around and search the territory, hoping to find something that could help him. In the end, he picked up a rusty scissor, twirling it between his fingers before placing one edge against his temple; twisting it a few times, then yanking on it.

His LED ring fell to the ground with a faint ’clink’, and he just stared at it, touching where it was used to be. It was that easy. The skin on his temple grew back instantly, like nothing was ever there to begin with. He moved to the other end of the yard, to some broken windows, where he could see his reflection at least briefly – raised the scissors again, and began to cut his hair.

He didn’t cut too much, but the messy look did disappear almost entirely in the back as some locks hit the ground; it wasn’t in his eyes now, but it was long enough to still keep at least _some_ of the wavy look, especially near his forehead. He ruffled it, ran his fingers through it to style it a little, and decided it was good enough.

The idea came to him out of the blue; he knew where he could go and hide at least for the time being. Kostyantyn took him there before, and it had certain areas that were completely cut off from possible visitors. He needed to get to Bald Mountain.

 

 

It was already dark by the time he reached his destination, but at least he was free to move around there; aside from the fact that no one would probably suspect him for an android, there were not many people on the trails after dark, and especially once he purposely went off trail, just straight ahead – right into the woods.

Nikita tried not to think about Kostyantyn, but it was just about impossible, and even more so with a free mind. He hoped he was okay, that they had him in the right hands and were taking care of him. He wondered how long it would take for his leg to heal completely… if he would forgive him for having to shoot him. If Kostyantyn also thought about him…

His thoughts came to a sudden halt as he noticed something in the distance – he immediately stopped, scanning the area quickly.

_There’s a fire nearby… campers? Here?_

He carefully attempted to move closer, stepping over a frew branches, beginning to hear movement – and he could barely move out of the way when he realized it came from behind him.

„Woah!” He gasped, jumping aside and landing on his butt – hardly believing his eyes when he looked up to see who sneaked up behind him.

„Lesya?!”

He didn’t get a response, other than the android trying to aim at him with a baseball bat for a second time – until another figure next to her stopped it mid-air.

„… Nikita? Is that you?”

He stared dumbfounded at the figure in front of him; it was Danylo.

„I… yes, it’s me. What are you…,” he stopped himself, slowly standing up, figuring it out himself. „This is your hideout.”

Danylo smiled, nodding – and confirming his suspicion. „Our people are just down there. No one comes around here, well… besides other androids, I assume,” he said, giving him a knowing look.

„Why are we having a chit chat like we’re the best of friends?!” Lesya finally lost her patience, gesturing towards him. „He’s bad news!”

„We are out of the police station, Lesya,” Danylo reminded.

„Not thanks to him! The human did it! He’s just the reason we got there to begin with!” Lesya insisted, with Nikita trying really hard not to show how thinking about Kostyantyn made him feel – besides, Lesya was right. He didn’t do a whole lot for them, besides trying to at least give them time, and then… not actively looking for them.

„He’s a deviant, now, Lesya. We have no reason to fear him, and he is welcome to stay with us if he needs to,” Danylo’s voice stayed calm and warm the entire time, glancing back at him and even rewarding him with a smile. „He is one of us.”

Nikita managed to allow a small smile, himself. He wondered what would Kostyantyn say if he knew he found them as soon as they stopped looking… or that they would be willing to take him in.

_Stop thinking about him!_

„Oh, bite me!” Lesya groaned, walking off mumbling to herself and leaving them.

„Don’t mind her. She snaps easily, but she has a good heart… deep down,” Danylo shrugged, making him smile yet again. „Are you alone? Do you need shelter?”

„I…,” Nikita couldn’t finish the sentence, he just stared down at his feet. He couldn’t have been more alone.

„I understand. I’m glad you are one of us now, though. I had high hopes for you,” Once again, such a friendly tone. Nikita honestly didn’t know what he did to deserve this kind of warm treatment.  „Come on, I’ll show you around, and you can meet the others.”

Nikita didn’t know what he expected, but it was certainly not the image that appeared in front of his eyes; everyone from the group was there, but so were about 15 others. He was shocked to spot Yana in the group of people, aswell as… Alina?

„Our number just keeps growing,” Danylo explained next to him. „Somehow we find each other… no one can really explain, but we all want the same thing. We want peace, and acceptance. We are just not entirely sure how to achieve that yet.”

Nikita was more or less speechless. There were some fires lit here and there, androids talking and just hanging out as if they were really campers… and one by one, they walked closer to them, clearly curious about him.

 

Everyone was welcoming, even when he didn’t say nearly enough about himself – just that he worked for the police, became deviant, and then had to run away. That was technically the truth, except it had a bit more to it, but he figured not everyone needed to know about the fact that somewhere in the middle of that he fell in love with his human partner. He could keep that to himself.

„So… how come you ran away?” Someone asked once the others around him dispersed a little. It was Pavlo, to Nikita’s mild surprise.

„Didn’t you hear the story?”

„No, I did, but…,” Pavlo shrugged, looking him in the eyes perhaps the first time. „You seemed to be very much on their side. You practically felt like one of them.”

„And you don’t like humans,” Nikita said, mainly just to get out of having to answer.

„It’s not that I don’t like them, I just… have bad experiences, as you know, therefore let’s just say I’m a bit more cautious.”

Nikita nodded, remembering what he found out from him vividly. He was abused by his owner, until he managed to escape. „I would say I… deviated from them?”

Pavlo grinned. „I guess that’s fair.”

„Is that the reason you talk to me now, more than before?”

Pavlo just shrugged, still smiling a little. „I don’t feel like I have to hide myself anymore. You are now like me. You understand it’s not just some sort of glitch, and that I am not at fault.”

Nikita bit his lower lip, nodding. Yes, he definitely did understand.

„May I join you?” A female voice asked, one that Nikita already knew, aswell.

„Sure, Alina,” Pavlo said, stepping a bit aside to let her join their conversation.

She looked straight at him, and although she looked the same as that one time on the street, she was still different. She was smiling, and there was no longer any sign of fear or desperation on her features. Nikita felt guilty yet again.

„Alina, how… how did you…”

„How did I manage to get away?” She asked, finishing it for him – he just nodded. „Well, they did catch me. But when they attempted to destroy me, I got away. It was not easy, but… but it was not the first time I had to run for my life, either.”

„I’m so sorry… I called the police to catch you,” he admitted quietly, not even being able to look her in the eyes.

To his surprise, she just chuckled, which only made him glance back up.

„I appreciate your apology, but you shouldn’t worry about it. You were doing your job… you weren’t awake. I wasn’t mad at you – especially after managing to get away.”

Nikita couldn’t believe anything that was happening. He watched as Alina and Pavlo exchanged a smile, and he just stood there, stunned.

„Come on, don’t just stand here alone,” Pavlo said then, seemingly wanting to grab him by his shoulder and pull him along – except he changed his mind, and just nodded at him to follow him towards the others instead. Nikita knew exactly what that cautiousness meant, how Pavlo was careful with touches – he didn’t want to be harsh. They were all human, with more humanity than certain humans.

All that time before… he was so blind.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn didn’t intend to spend any more time in that hospital room, just laying around, and no one could’ve been able to make him stay – no doctor, no nurse, no boss, and not even Artem, calling to check up on him every day.

He was there for five days –  five days were four more than necessary. His leg was fine; it was not a serious injury, and he could even walk, even if it hurt a little. He was not going to admit that part to anyone anyway.

Even his doctor said the wound was healing nicely, though, so they had no reason to keep him in, other than to watch it heal – he could do that at home, too. Sadly Captain Orlyk wouldn’t let him work for at least another week, so he didn’t have much of a choice, but he was incredibly restless the past few days, and there were barely any distractions in there. Not to mention he also missed his cat.

… Or that he couldn’t stop thinking about Nikita. He had no way of knowing how he was, or where he was, and if he was really a deviant. Because if he _was_ , and if everything he said was true, then… he needed to do something, except he couldn’t do anything, but just lay there. He was done. He was going home.

 

 

There was a strange, warm feeling in his stomach as he was unlocking his door, hoping to maybe… somehow find Nikita inside. Part of him knew that was unlikely, but the other couldn’t help but entertain the possibility, however small it was.

In the end, of course, logic won. No one was inside but Citrus, and Kostyantyn picked him up, not even wanting to let go for a while. He had to keep thinking logically, doing the opposite of trying to find him… that could just get him in more trouble, not to mention that he wouldn’t even know where to look. Nikita was an android, with abilities he didn’t possess, no doubt being able to stay hidden if he didn’t want anyone to find him. Besides, above all… his safety came first. Kostyantyn trusted that Nikita knew what he was doing.

„I really have to accept that I won’t see him again, huh?” He asked his cat, feeling every bit as pathetic as he no doubt looked at that moment.

Deep down, however, he knew he was not the type to just give up. Especially not when one of the last things Niktia told him was that he _cared_   about him.

_I care, too…_

There were so many things that should’ve been talked out properly, and leaving everything like this seemed like such a waste… whether he liked it or not, Nikita became important to him, and he felt certain things that he couldn’t even explain properly. He knew he wouldn’t be able to just leave it, even if there were risks… he _couldn’t_.

 

 

*

 

 

It’s been a whole week since Nikita joined the deviants, and he settled in well enough; the group quickly accepted him, even Lesya in the end – well, more or less, just like they did with everyone else who joined them – there were three other deviants adding to the group since he was there. Everyone had a story, and everyone wanted the same.

Ideas starting floating around about a possible approach towards the humans, but there still weren’t enough of them to risk giving up their hidden location and possibly sacrifice some of them – they wanted to move forward and fight for it peacefully, but the stakes were too high. On the other end, they didn’t have all the time in the world, either; they knew that if they begin to get short on bio-components or blue blood that kept them active, they would start shutting down one by one.

Thankfully, they still had some back-up, just in case, but they all knew it wouldn’t last forever. They were aware they had to take a step sooner than later, but just for now… everyone wanted to take their time a little more, and just hope for the best, until they had absolutely no choice but to take action and face the humans. All of them secretly hoped for a bigger turn in Detroit aswell, that being the central hub of android situations right now, but it seemed as if things only kept getting worse there, too.

Nikita grew to really like these people, and almost began to feel like he could actually stay with them for as long as necessary, but his thoughts didn’t disappear – nor his feelings; his curiousity about Kostyantyn grew every day, and he… he _missed_  him. He missed his witty remarks, his stupid sunglasses, his entire presence. It took so much willpower to stay put, but he tried his best, telling himself it was the right thing to do for Kostyantyn’s sake aswell.

 

He was sitting on a log near the fire, watching the others. His eyes skimmed through a handful of androids, before they stopped and lingered on Stepan and Tatiana. They were talking to some others, but Stepan had his arm around Tatiana’s shoulder, who was leaning against him, and they laughed, as if everything was fine.

Whenever he saw them together, something twisted in his stomach area painfully, like he could actually feel pain. Perhaps this was a different kind of pain… some sort of longing, jealousy, some kind of wistful hope, mixed with loneliness. It became clear to him within a day that Stepan told him the truth at the interrogation, even if he already knew it was likely true; they really _were_ in love, undoubtedly. Danylo briefly told him about their history… how they never met before they formed their group, but quickly became inseperable because of their similar nature and outlook on the world, even if they did have differences, too. He called them soulmates.

_Soulmates, huh?_

He watched as Stepan lovingly leaned down to kiss the top of her head mid-conversation, absent-mindedly, and that twisting feeling came back.

„They really are inspiring aren’t they?” Alina’s voice made him jolt a little as she asked him, taking a seat right next to him.

He smiled a little. „I suppose so. You would think it’s nice to look at them, but…”

„Part of you ends up wishing you didn’t have to see it,” Alina sighed.

He blinked, turning to her. „Yes… exactly.”

She smiled to herself, glancing down at the ground. „I was in love once, too, you know. That was one of the things that helped me wake up.”

Nikita stared at her… not saying a word. Not knowing how to.

She sighed, and looked at the couple not far from them again. „We were at the same household, Sofia and me. The family was rich, with a lot of land to take care of, and one android just wasn’t enough. With time… we grew really close, and began talking when everyone was asleep, or when we finished with our work, sometimes even in secret. Eventually, things turned into something else between us. We would hint at it, but we never actually gathered the courage to take the first step. In the end, I lost my chance to even try…”

Nikita found himself subconsciously leaning closer, although he could hear her perfectly.

„The family began to notice that our work wasn’t as great as it used to be – we became distracted, without ever admitting to it. They decided to get rid of Sofia… she got there later, so they blamed it on her. I couldn’t admit to it, I couldn’t disobey, so I just let it happen. I let them sell her to a store, and reset her memory, until someone else would buy her. I loved her, and I let her go, because I was terrified of not being who I was supposed to be,” Alina teared up slightly, but quickly wiped her eyes with her sleeve. „Then everything just sort of went horribly wrong… I stopped working diligently, I became depressed, and then they decided to get rid of me, too, and just buy new androids entirely. I snapped, and when they saw I was a deviant, they attempted to kill me. I escaped, and ran away, hurt and new to all of this… I was still on the run when you two found me.”

Nikita just listened, feeling a crushing weight on his shoulders. Alina in a way, was so much like him. Listening to her story made him feel like he was suffocating again. „I’m… I’m so sorry.”

Alina chuckled, despite the tears in her eyes earlier, showing him a strong smile, whereas he probably looked utterly sad – which he was, he really felt for her.

„It’s all good,” she assured, sitting up more straight. „I still didn’t give up on finding her, you know. Maybe one day I will, and then perhaps make her remember somehow… tell her I’m sorry, and that I was a coward, and made the wrong decision when I hid my feelings and left her alone. Or if that wouldn’t work, then I’d just try to get her to feel the same way again, even without memories.”

Nikita would’ve loved to say a lot of things, but he was entirely lost for words – all he could do was look at her, and speak genuinely. „I really hope you will find her.”

„Thank you,” she nodded, turning back to look at him with a knowing, gentle expression. „And what about you?”

„What… about me?” Nikita asked, surprised.

Alina shook her head, chuckling a little again. It was somehow… bittersweet.

„You and the the cop I saw you with. The human. You love him.”

Nikita froze, feeling a rush of warmth overcome him – but at the same time, icy panic.

„It’s written all over you… and I can tell,” Alina whispered, like she was his confidant. „You should go back to him, Nikita.”

The last sentence made him feel like he was punched somewhere where it hurt the most. „I… I can’t,” he whispered in the end, averting his gaze. „He wouldn’t feel the same. It’s better for him if I just –”

„Yes, you can. Please don’t make the same mistake I did,” she said, reaching for his hand and gently squeezing it. „You still have a chance to be with who you want to be with. Go back to him, Nikita. Go home.”

_Home… to Kostyantyn._

That word had a special implication. And despite how absurd it felt, he… he couldn’t quite stop thinking about Alina’s words from then on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience and support! I appreciate every single one of you, and every bit of reaction, I can't even put it into words :') I'm glad we got here, and I'm excited about everything that's yet to follow, too, and sharing it all with you! Thank you for being with me, and see you next week! <3
> 
> PS; yes, Nikita's entire deviant look and attire is based on the Снов Осколки video! God bless. Also, fun fact, when picturing Lesya I imagine Mariya Yaremchuk every single time.


	10. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a rough beginning, several hardships and many complications... perhaps it's time to find home.

@nikialekseev, how do i even say that you are incredible beyond words? because you /are/. thank you so much for all your work, help, and for giving me inspiration

 

 

*

 

 

The whole week felt like it was dragging on forever, and the fact that he still had approximately another week off work nearly made Kostyantyn drive up the goddamn wall. His leg was healing just fine, it’s been over a week since he got hurt, and by now he could more or less master walking around with only minimal wincing.

Just as he originally thought, he did end up at least driving around the area in the past week, hoping to spot something, although he already knew his chances were impossibly low. There were some news, however; a clothing store contacted the station, and Captain Orlyk told him that Nikita seemingly stole some everyday clothing, and then disappeared.

Kostyantyn couldn’t help but smile to himself upon hearing that… at least he was smart about it. He kept telling himself that Nikita would be okay, that he knew what he had to do. But that still didn’t help him feel much better. He just couldn’t rest, and feeling relieved was out of the question. He wondered if this specific worry and uneasiness would ever go away… but deep down, he knew it was not likely, especially while he was missing him so much.

 

Later at night, as he was laying on his couch with his cat on his stomach, watching some… sort of movie that he wasn’t particularly interested in, humoring himself by squinting at the screen and tilting his head a little to at least make it seem more interesting, there was a faint knock on the door. He turned to look at the time, which showed nearly 11pm, and he raised a brow. Citrus promptly jumped off of his stomach, and he watched as he disappeared in his bedroom instead.

He sat up, and walked towards the door with slow steps… another small knock. He felt something warm beginning to spread in his stomach as he considered the possibilities of who it might be. He didn’t want to hope for anything, but it was almost as if he knew, like he could feel it. _Sense_ him.

_Please…_

He placed his hand over the doorknob, and let out a sigh.

_Please…_

He began pushing it down, then opening the door slowly.

His breath immediately got caught in his throat from the sight. Perhaps he knew, but he still overcame with the biggest rush of relief he’d ever experienced as he took in his appearence. There he was, although a lot different than the last time he saw him, looking so impossibly… human.

„Nikita…,” he breathed, although he had no idea why he was whispering. Perhaps it was the relief; the sense of something finally calming down inside of him after weeks of uncertainty and worry.

Nikita was seemingly nervous, apologetic, and perhaps a little apprehensive; but his eyes were somewhat glossy, and –

„Kostya…”

He couldn’t just handle standing there like an idiot. He reached out and pulled him into a hug, which lacked any force whatsoever, and it was impossibly gentle instead, almost like he just got something back that was fragile beyond belief. Despite that, he held him close, and allowed himself to give into the feeling just a little – he honestly thought he’d never experience it again, afterall. Nikita also had his arms around him, and it felt almost like his face was buried in his shoulder. Kostyantyn felt like crying, for some stupid reason.

„I’m so sorry about your leg – ”

„Oh, who gives a damn? I was… I was worried about you,” Kostyantyn said earnestly, interrupting him, to which it felt like Nikita reacted with holding him just a little bit closer. „Besides, my leg is fine,” he added, reluctantly pulling away to look at him with a grin. „You’re a terrible shot.”

Hearing Nikita laugh a little was honestly healing, in a way. He took a good look at him once he got him inside properly, and closed the door behind them.

„I like the new style,” he commented, observing everything from his shoes to the top of his head. He loved the messy curls, but this shorter style made him look more… deviant, definitely. It was a rather attractive look on him. But those eyes still made sure he looked less wild than not.

„Do you?” Nikita asked, looking down on himself, aswell. „I just needed new clothes, so I planned to pick out some random ones, but I actually like them, too.”

„I will let you borrow some of mine, aswell… although they might be a little big for you,” he added, musing a little, finding Nikita’s expression all too fascinating. „I assume you will stay here with me?”

„I… you…”

Deviant – no, more human Nikita was already his favorite. Kostyantyn smiled, shaking his head.

„You have zero plans, admit it. The police is after you, and let’s be honest… no one would look for you _here_ ,” he reasoned, deciding to leave out the part about how he had no intention of letting him go, just after getting him back, in a sense.

„That’s true, but…,” he gave Nikita a Look, just as if he was still his superior, making him close his mouth and nod, to his greatest satisfaction. „Alright. Thank you.”

 

 

*

 

 

Being around Kostyantyn again after a week felt surreal, in a way. Nikita honestly didn’t know how it would go, if he listened to Alina and really came here. He tried to stop himself from doing something so reckless again, but in the end, he decided he was holding back more than enough before – not to mention that he just couldn’t get her words out of his head. Now that he had free will, he barely had any self perseverance when it came to him. And now, being back… it was not like anything he expected, not at all.

Kostyantyn was… very warm with him, his remarks turned playful, and the fact that he even offered to hide him made him feel like he was actually hallucinating.

_Perhaps he missed me a little, too, afterall?_

He sat down on the couch with him, and for a moment they just faced each other. Clearly, he was wearing no sunglasses this time, and those blue eyes seemed to mess with his head even more now that he didn’t see him for a while. Nikita tried his level best not to blush, even if he knew that he would have to tell him how he felt… that was the reason he came back, right? To let him know, to lay all his cards down, even if he might really never want to see him again after that.

„So where were you?” Kostyantyn asked then, making his thoughts come to a sudden stop.

„You won’t believe this…,” he said with a smile, shaking his head. „I found the deviant group. On Bald Mountain. They took me in.”

Kostyantyn’s expression was impossible to read for a second, but then he just laughed, clearly amused. „Shit! Bald Mountain, of course… and you were with _them_. God, this is too ironic.”

„Tell me about it…,” he smiled, biting his lower lip in thought before continuing. „Alina was there, too. She is okay.”

Kostyantyn stared at him for a moment, and then smiled a little. „Good. I’m glad she is.”

„And how is your leg?” He asked then, some worry and guilt slipping into his tone.

Kostyantyn just brushed it off, though. „It’s completely fine. I can walk around, as you could see. You calculated the shot really well, because the bullet didn’t hit anything crucial. I even left the hospital early.”

He must have given him a very disapproving look, because Kostyantyn laughed again, immediately trying to reassure him. „I’m fine, Nikita! And honestly, it’s thanks to you,” by the end, his tone turned sincere, and Nikita almost forgave him for being reckless. „I can’t believe what they tried to do to you… I’m very proud of you for pushing through.”

His mouth opened slightly, but no words left him. He just closed it instead, and smiled. He couldn’t properly express how that made him feel coming from him, anyway.

„Although the Captain is not letting me work for another week, so maybe I’m a _little bit_ pissed at you for shooting me, afterall,” Kostyantyn said jokingly, and he went with it – anything, just so he wouldn’t have to think about how being alone with him for a week made him feel.

_Well, that is, if he would still want me around after finding out that I…_

He had to tell him, he really needed to, but maybe not before removing some obstacles from the picture.

„Kostya, can I… ask you something?” He asked, fidgeting a little.

He instantly had his attention; Kostyantyn nodded, and he tried not to pay too much mind to the fact he seemingly really liked that he was calling him by his nickname now, and by that only.

„This is something I wondered about ever since we met… and I asked you once, but you didn’t want to give me a reason. Still, can you please tell me why you dislike androids so much?”

He watched as Kostyantyn’s expression changed entirely, and how he sat up properly, letting out a sigh. He knew he will get his answer now, and he needed to know, too. If he really did still dislike them, perhaps then Nikita didn’t even have to tell him about his feelings, because there would be no point – well, even less than in general. Either way, learning about the reason could perhaps help him see more clearly.

„I wish I could say I was just full of prejudice, even if that would make me sound like an asshole,” Kostyantyn laughed a little awkwardly, finally seeming to get comfortable – Nikita could tell without even having to be an android that he didn’t want to talk about it one bit… but he still did it for him. „It is a part of it, though. I wasn’t actually exposed to androids enough to be able to see more than… what was on the surface, or what everyone else said, I suppose. All I knew was that people were losing jobs because of you, that some of you turned against your owners or could potentially even be a threat, that you all were nothing more than machines, disguised to be humans, and I… I believed all that, in fact I was almost stubbornly _convinced_.”

Nikita nodded slowly. That was not especially surprising, nor he could’ve held it against him. It’s not as if _he himself_ had a much different stance in the very beginning. But he knew there was more to follow.

„There was something… that happened, too,” Kostyantyn continued, looking down at his own hands – Nikita could tell his eyes were far away, probably recalling a memory from the past, seeing something that no one else could. „My grandmother was placed in a home after she got sick, and we couldn’t properly take care of her without medical help, not on our own. It was a nice facility, and she was taken care of, we had nothing to complain about, even her condition seemed to get better with time. They had some… androids working there, aswell, certain types created for taking care of elder people. I didn’t think much of it, I assumed they could just use the extra staff, but later we found out they had more android workers there than humans.”

Kostyantyn took a big breath, and Nikita just listened, already suspecting where it was going. „One night, my grandmother got worse, and was in need of immediate help. The android that was on that floor got shut down for the night – they shouldn’t have deactivated it, they just… forgot, I guess. It was crucial, and that mistake cost her life. We threatened to sue, it was… a horribly hard time for my parents, and for me… I loved her so much, and I just,” Kostyantyn huffed, looking almost desperate as he looked at him. „It was human error, and I know that now, but back then… all I could think of was that if they didn’t use androids to begin with, it wouldn’t have happened. From that point on, I just… I didn’t want anything to do with any of you.”

„I’m so sorry, Kostya,” Nikita whispered, even he himself overcoming with some sort of anger… it was just unfair that he had to go through something like that. He understood everything… it made sense for him to react that way, and develop a strong sense of dislike for their kind.

„Thank you,” he nodded, before smiling a little. „I don’t think that way anymore, though. You, and all the others proved me that I was wrong. I guess I needed to see it with my own eyes, what androids are really like.”

Nikita smiled back at him, feeling relief despite everything else.

„I should probably get some rest…,” Kostyantyn said with a sigh, and Nikita pressed his lips together, nodding. It was late, and he most likely already exhausted him with a heavy topic. Maybe he could wait another day? „You… feel at home, really,” he added with a small smile, standing up.

Yes, he can definitely wait at least one more day.

 

He couldn’t wait. He was sitting where Kostyantyn left him, several minutes later, and his mind just kept spinning. Citrus kept him company by playfully headbutting his legs and then his arm, and Nikita smiled at the cat, but he just couldn’t relax.

He felt strangely guilty, being there without saying what he really came here for to begin with, even if Kostyantyn didn’t have a direct problem with androids anymore, _being_ with one that had _feelings_ for him might just become a little too much for Kostyantyn. What if he thought Nikita was disgusting for wanting something from him?

_Oh, please… he kissed me once, almost twice!_

Despite the more logical side of him reminding him of everything from before that could prove him otherwise, he couldn’t help but feel anxious. Kostyantyn did say some things that could’ve very clearly implied that he wasn’t interested in him in that way – that he thought it wasn’t right. Nikita wanted him to know he would never force him into anything, but he also needed him to know that he was… that he was _alive_ , and that he was completely in love with him.

He thought about Alina, her story, what she advised him… and he stood up.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t sleep; the whole thing about Nikita being there made him feel more worked up than he expected, perhaps that’s why he felt the recurring need to get up and basically just run away. He just couldn’t trust himself around him. He desperately tried to find the right way to feel about all this, but it didn’t feel like he had much control over something like that; all he really felt was relief, excitement, and perhaps… something bigger than him, and all sorts of logic.

He glanced at his door, leading to where Nikita was in the living room. Maybe… maybe he should…

He sighed and jumped to his feet, walking towards the door – until he heard a knock on it, and he froze. His heart immediately started beating loudly, to the point where he could hear it in his ears. Hell, maybe even Nikita could hear it from outside.

He opened his door, reminding himself that he was a grown adult – only to see a very nervous Nikita standing right in front of him.

„I’m sorry to bother you,” he began, averting his gaze. „It’s just that I actually came here for a reason, and I feel like it’s not fair if I keep it inside, and just accept staying here without you knowing about it.”

_God, he’s blushing again…_

Kostyantyn nodded, holding onto the door, just in case he needed some sort of support. „Yes?”

„I… I completely understand if you won’t want anything to do with me after this, I would even gladly go back to the others, but I need to at least know that I tried.”

Nikita finally looked up, blue meeting the warmest of brown, somehow conveying more than words could, and Kostyantyn was definitely glad he was holding onto the door, because somehow, he still wasn’t prepared for the actual words that followed.

„I’ve fallen in love with you. I… I never thought it would be possible, but I can guarantee you it is. It was actually a big part of why I became a deviant. I know you had many doubts about me, but I want to try and make them all go away, and prove you that I mean it.”

He knew he meant it, of course… the gentle, almost wistful look in his eyes, and sincere tone in his voice told him that much. He realized he was holding his breath only when his lungs started to sting, in desperate need of air. At that same time, Nikita took his free hand, and lifted it to his lips, placing a gentle kiss across it before lifting it against his cheek, and Kostyantyn needed all his willpower so his knees wouldn’t buckle.

„Please… can you feel me? I promise you I am very much real, just like everything I feel for you is,” he whispered, leaning into his touch, a soft plead with closed eyes, and Kostyantyn began to feel like everything was spinning, his own eyes wanting to flutter closed.

„N-Nikita…,” he whispered, his voice trembling a little too much, even like this. He needed to grab a hold of himself, and talk to him properly. „Just… come lay down with me a little?” He suggested, reluctantly moving his hand from his cheek and pulling him towards the bed carefully.

 

They laid there for long minutes, on their sides, just looking at each other, as Kostyantyn tried his level best to think rationally, feeling like he ultimately lost the power to, anyway. He promised Nikita they would talk properly, but he barely found the words.

It was not an uncomfortable or a nerve-inducing silence, though… he reached out and caressed Nikita’s hair with one hand, smiling as a stubborn lock didn’t want to get out of the way. It was then that he noticed that his LED ring was gone. There was no scar or anything in its previous place, and he began wondering… he traced a single finger down the back of Nikita’s hand, and he bit his own lower lip.

„Can you show me?” He asked, he himself not even sure how he would react, but knowing he was beyond curious, that perhaps he just had to see it.

Nikita just nodded, seemingly knowing exactly what he meant without having to ask for clarification; and Kostyantyn was speechless as he watched Nikita raise his hand, the skin slowly disappearing from his fingers, and then his whole hand. The smooth, white, metalic-looking hand in front of him just made him feel more curious instead of thrown off; he carefully reached out and ran his fingers through it now. It felt smooth indeed, but also harder to the touch, and not as soft and warm as it was before. It was incredible, and he stared at it, focused. And then the skin was back, looking like a completely normal human hand again.

„Are you… more repulsed by me after this?” Nikita asked carefully, as if he was afraid of the answer, and goodness, he wished he could just reassure him properly somehow.

„No, not at all,” he said, shaking his head. „In fact, I think I’m even more intrigued, if anything.”

_You are beautiful._

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita’s eyes widened, just staring at him. That was not the answer he expected at all, but he could tell that Kostyantyn was being serious.

„Oh? I thought… you had some issues about me not being… human,” he said quietly.

Kostyantyn somehow seemed to have moved closer to him, and he tried really hard not to get swept away by those very blue eyes that now seemingly pierced his own.

„I was confused, I wasn’t sure… who you really were. I have no doubts now… in fact, I feel like I was right,” he smiled a little, and Nikita couldn’t help but smile back, at least a little, even if he wasn’t sure what he meant. „I always felt like you were more than a machine, that you were just holding back. But I was drawn to you for a reason all this time… I _wanted_ you to be… reachable for me.”

He didn’t find the words, he was practically stunned into silence.

„You don’t need to ask me to try and see you, because I promise you I do. I saw you this whole time, actually. Especially right now, but even before… Nikita, you have your own personality. You feel things, you have free will, and you have empathy. You are no any less human than me. I see no signs of a machine,” he whispered, and Nikita could -yet again-, feel his breath on his skin, his scent…

„You are… you,” Kostyantyn added, and Nikita was quite simply mesmerized by him, his eyes, and the way he said those words he was desperate to hear all this time. „A feeling, alive… _person_.”

„You really think so?” He whispered back, his eyes just not letting go of Kostyantyn’s – only when he licked his lips, and Nikita followed the motion with almost hungry eyes.

„I know so,” he watched as the words formed on his lips, and he leaned closer. He couldn’t help it.

He leaned in, and only looked up to see Kostyantyn do the same – before his eyes fell shut as their lips met in the middle. Kostyantyn craddled his cheek with one hand, caressing it gently with his thumb as he kissed him, so impossibly gently.

It was different from the last time, but it wasn’t necessarily any worse or better; this time it was full of deeper emotions, taking the place of frustration and anger from before. Kostyantyn’s lips weren’t demanding… no, they felt like the softest caress, slowly moving against his own, taking the time and doing it all with intent.

_Not like a possible mistake… he wants me, too._

He wasn’t sure how long it was going on; gentle, small pecks and long, meaningful kisses following each other, until he felt like he reached a different plane of existence. Kostyantyn’s touch, his kisses, everything in it showed him just how important he really was to him, just in case he had any doubts left, making him feel like he was, in fact, the most precious thing to him.

_How could something so gentle feel so maddening and perfect?_

He couldn’t believe –

„I love you, too,” he heard him whisper inbetwen, dazed, making something in him quite possibly explode as he let out a quiet, stunned noise, which made Kostyantyn smile against his lips. „In case it wasn’t already obvious… You’ve been subtly wrapping me around your finger and driving me crazy… all this time, in which I wanted you, Nikita, in ways I didn’t understand at first, or tried to cover up,” Kostyantyn pulled back a little to look into his eyes, and once again Nikita was captured in eternal blue. He was speechless and stunned, allowing himself to get lost in them as the the real world simply ceased to exist, and almost as if Kostyantyn gained courage from it, he continued, his eyes not leaving his own; „But I do love you, and it doesn’t scare me. Not anymore.”

Nikita felt like the room did a backflip with them, followed by several more. It caught him so off guard, not expecting him to say anything like that. He could sense that Kostyantyn was almost delirious, like his usual composure was gone, that for once he wasn’t holding back. In response, Nikita just kissed him more eagerly – although just as gently, because he could. He really, honestly could, because they _both_ wanted it, and he didn’t need to hold back anymore, either. He smiled into it, they both did, and he felt like it was just impossible to feel happier than in that specific moment.

 

It didn’t take long until he could sense that Kostyantyn began to feel more tired, and Nikita pulled back a little, like a real hero, allowing him to rest. He could only imagine how drained he must’ve been, especially emotionally, after everything tonight.

Just as he predicted, he fell asleep quickly, and Nikita just watched him for a while, smiling warmly. Everything about him was beautiful, and he still felt lightheaded from the fact that he was kissing him just minutes ago, or that he could keep doing it – that he loved him, and he was loved in return.

„We’ve come a long way, hmm?” He mused quietly, gently brushing some black locks out of his eyes, and admiring his long eyelashes once again. Admiring _everything_ about him. This time, he promised himself that he would never leave him again. Not as long as Kostyantyn wanted him around.

He turned and laid on his back for a while, trying to process everything – his mind might’ve did it instantly, but he was still more or less unable to. Was it possible… that he actually fell even more in love tonight?

All he knew for sure was that he was likely the luckiest… _person_ out there – and that he really, really needed to thank Alina one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your support! I hope this chapter got to you all just as much as it got to me :') It's been a journey - and for them, too - to get to this point. Thank you all for being here to see it happen <3 Here's to hoping nothing will come between them anymore... hopefully?  
> See you soon!


	11. All For One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things seem to have fallen in place between Kostyantyn and Nikita... but they can't enjoy it for too long.

PSA; @nikialekseev is forever my hero. thank you.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn woke up from a hazy dream, blinking his eyes open, and trying to slip back into reality. He dreamed about Nikita, which was not exactly rare lately, but this one was perhaps a little steamy, involving a lot more desperate and intense kissing than the previous night –

_The previous night!_

He sat up, memories flooding his head, and when he didn’t see anyone next to him, he considered the possibility that he might’ve dreamed the entire thing. But before worry and disappointment had the chance to completely overwhelm him, his bedroom door opened, and there he was – with a tray in his hand, and something delicious smelling on it.

„Good morning,” he said with a bright smile, making Kostyantyn feel like he needed several moments to pull himself together from seeing him after everything that happened; it really felt like it was some sort of dream, like he was hallucinating the whole thing.

He felt heat spreading on his face – and he _never_   blushed, not in front of others anyway –, as he thought about how impossibly honest he became last night. Nikita somehow completely got him to unravel in front of him. He was so honest, not holding back at all, and he actually admitted…

He bit the inside of his cheek, and attempted to think about something else.

„You… made me breakfast?” He asked, trying to peak and inspect the tray, which held some eggs, pastry and hot coffee. There was something rather domestic about the gesture, and he couldn’t deny that he found it rather… pleasing. Why wasn’t he surprised that Nikita could cook, aswell?

„I did, I figured you to be the type who rarely takes care of that kind of thing.”

„Hey!” He sent him a Look, but they both just grinned as Nikita placed the tray over his lap and sat down at the end of his bed.

„Thank you,” he said in the end, tasting it – the egg yolk practically melted in his mouth.

_God, this is just unfair on every level._

„This is really good, and I’m not surprised one bit… which is horrible,” he shook his head playfully, and watched with a smirk as Nikita laughed a little. He was so full of life… looking at him now, it was really easy to believe that he made him lose every sense of himself last night. He had that ability, and at least it became clear for him, too, that he was way more gone on him than he originally thought he was.

_I admitted it out loud before I even dared to admit it to myself…_

But Nikita deserved to know. To know, and be reassured of it, because it was true. It really was. He could easily see him as someone who he wanted to have, even when he had no idea about the extent of that. There were no ounce of doubts remaining in his mind about this being what he wanted. About Nikita being _who_ he wanted. Nikita started as his android… partner. There was some irony in that now.

_Partner… boyfriend?_

He wasn’t ever too big on relationships, especially while he was studying, and then his job kept him busy enough. He somehow didn’t even have time to think about it, or truly feel like he was lacking it, missing it. But looking at Nikita, he saw an opportunity.

It's been a long time since he last saw him as a machine when he looked at him, let alone now – a stray thought told him that perhaps he never really did, and that’s why he wanted him to be more human this whole time, which caused him to be that frustrated with him. Because he wanted it to _show_ , so he could, in the end… well, get to know the real him? He was _alive_ , and he managed to make him feel things that… that he didn’t even remember anymore. Or maybe even more than that?

 

 

*

 

 

While Nikita waited for Kostyantyn to finish his shower after breakfast, he flicked through some channels in front of the TV, with Citrus dozing off next to him. He had this strange, comfortable feeling settling in his stomach; how he could just stay like this, stay with Kostyantyn, for as long as it was possible.

He glanced towards the bathroom door, and smiled to himself a little. The warm, gentle, aswell as the playfully teasing side of Kostyantyn really made everything worse, in a sense. Now he was sure he would be addicted forever.

Something on the TV got his attention then, and he turned back to it, intrigued.

„The android crisis is at its absolute peak in Detroit at the moment,” the news reporter said, just as he leaned forward, slowly getting immersed in it. He didn’t even notice Kostyantyn getting back until he sat down next to him.

„What are we watching?” He asked, sitting close enough so their legs touched, causing Nikita’s normally unbreakable focus to waver a little yet again.

„There are marches and protests all around the city, with several deviants. The Detroit Police is concerned, and the President is talking about a possible revolution, led by androids,” the reporter answered Kostyantyn’s question, and Nikita watched his face – he was frowning, and sighed as he reached for the remote control. „It seems like the situation is spreading, and our machines might just become our enem –”

Kostyantyn muted it and sighed, leaning back. Nikita understood precisely why he didn’t want to hear more – it wasn’t as if he himself was happy about the news.

„They… the androids here, they might need help,” he said quietly, watching as Kostyantyn turned to him, with probably the exact same thing on his mind.

Nikita couldn’t shake off the feeling of wanting to protect and help his kind, especially when there was so much injustice around them. They were misunderstood, and the police in The States were actually actively killing off many of them, simply because they didn’t get it. He didn’t want Ukraine’s androids to face the same fate, especially with the media and news from abroad, which could possibly push Ukraine’s leaders in the same direction, making them believe that something like that would be the correct solution.

„It doesn’t really look good, does it?” Kostyantyn sighed next to him, massaging his temple and closing his eyes. He could feel his frustration, aswell, and knew he wanted to protect them all the same. His helplessness matched his own rather well.

Nikita just watched him, and mused, his thoughts somehow managing to wander, despite everything. Kostyantyn was something else, to somehow have this kind of power over him, over all logic… to get him caught up in… thoughts and feelings that were all too _human_ , even when he should’ve been focusing on something troubling at the moment.

_He’s so pretty…_

The pale skin, white shirt, impossibly dark locks – not styled at all now, just looking soft, getting into his eyes – those eyes, which still had the power to capture him and not let go, and did things to him that shouldn’t have been allowed. He leaned a bit closer, subconsciously; he smelled so nice… this scent was a bit different, just getting out of the shower, although he could still sense the caramel and very subtly, some coffee. But also… perhaps pine?

„Hey there,” Kostyantyn’s voice – or rather, small chuckle, made him blink his eyes open – he didn’t even realize he had them closed, or how close he actually leaned in the process. He had the funny idea that it was almost as if he didn’t simply defy his programming, but Kostyantyn himself was subtly overwriting it the whole time… tuning it, capturing him…

He sucked in a breath, and smiled innocently, watching as Kostyantyn moved, somehow managing to lean over him, lifting one of his knees over to the other side of him, practically straddling him, but without actually touching him. It was only the gesture, not anything physical, but he felt pinned nontheless. „Hi,” was all that came from him, dazed.

Kostyantyn just grinned again, undoubtedly entertained by him, and that was when Nikita knew that he was completely at his mercy – not that he minded it one bit.

 

 

*

 

 

He noticed, of course, as Nikita leaned closer to him without realizing, or how undoubtedly affected he became, and he couldn’t help but find the gesture absolutely –

„You really are rather cute, aren’t you?” He asked with a smile, taking in the way he was looking at him. His eyes seemed unfocused, even his pupils seemed to have been more dilated than normal – it reminded him of how Nikita looked at him the previous night, with nothing but clear warmth, happiness, and desire – and it was exactly one of the things that made him seem so impossibly human, just like he _was_ ; he forgot about himself, his reactions betrayed him, and he couldn’t control them whatsoever. Not to mention that charming, subtle blush – except this was blue in color. Kostyantyn felt like he could stare at him and be mesmerized by his reactions to him for hours.

Nikita attempted to glance away, to which he just smirked, and moved a bit closer so he knew his breath was practically tickling his cheeks. „Are you trying to escape?”

It was pretty amusing, how Nikita huffed, perhaps his blush a bit more prominent, shaking his head. „Why would I escape from something I want?” He challenged back, raising a brow… then beginning to smirk, too, as Kostyantyn clearly got a little bit distracted. It really went both ways.

„Oh, I don’t know,” he replied in a whisper, leaning in just enough so his lips brushed against Nikita’s. He really wondered how it was possible that they were so impossibly soft… „Perhaps you are trying to test m –”

In the next moment, Nikita was kissing him, and all he could do was smiling into it as he kissed him back, his thoughts dispersing soon enough. He definitely liked this sort of teasing and power-play even better than the ones they used to have.

It was still new, so he didn’t especially want to push it, but he couldn’t help but deepen it soon enough, allowing himself to get at least a little bit lost in the feeling – Nikita always kissed him back eagerly, so he knew it was welcomed, in the very least. Besides, he still couldn’t exactly get enough of him –

In the next moment, Nikita managed to capture his lower lip, biting down on it gently, making him groan as a shiver ran through his spine – oh, it was also dangerous. He pulled back after a small peck, laughing to himself, trying to mask how effected _he_ was this time. He couldn’t go overboard… right?

 

During the day, even more thoughts arised in his mind, regarding the same issues – to the point where he started to feel like an absolute idiot.

They spent the day just hanging out and talking, surfing channels, and they even played video games – oh, the playful competition was very much present between them even during that time; he knew that Nikita could win anything at any time, but it was as if he turned the android part off, and so they could properly compete, and in the most human way; they would playfully nudge the other on purpose, or create distractions that were very much unfair.

At one point, Nikita sneakily leaned close to him during an intense part in the game, and placed a kiss just below his ear – needless to say, he completely missed his chance, and lost several points.

In return, he blew hot air right _against_ his ear when it was Nikita’s turn to do well, making him tremble and thus lose the fight, and laughed loudly when Nikita gave him a reproachful glare. From that point on, they tried to sabotage the other with several other means, like pushing each other ’accidentally’ during critical moments, or even attempting to scare the other. Nevertheless, Kostyantyn felt like he was having the most fun that he had in a long while.

But the whole time, his mind was spinning, even if he wouldn’t ever dare to admit it. He tried to console himself with the idea that it was just healthy curiosity. That it was just that if he learned anything lately, it was that it was rather easy to get carried away around Nikita. But how carried away could he allow himself to get? There was no denying in the fact that he was attracted to him in every single way – on top of it all, he actually had serious feelings for him, and as impossible as that concept seemed to be for him in the very beginning… it was true.

They had tension between them from the first moment, and perhaps it was no surprise that sometimes just a little kissing was enough to ignite something within him, let alone an actual make out session, where his limits were pushed by Nikita nibbling on his lower lip and whatnot. He felt like he shouldn’t have thought about any of these things, but well… he was human, wasn’t he? He actually had limits, and didn’t have as much self-control as Nikita perhaps believed. And Nikita, he… he was _practically_ human.

_What the hell is wrong with me?!_

He caught himself glancing at him from the corner of his eye, wondering… if that was even possible? He was created for helping with investigations, would he even be able to –

_Oh my god!_

He started to feel like some pervert, all of a sudden, even if he knew that the truth was that he just couldn’t help but be curious, given their situation. If they really were to have a relationship, just how much could that include? He wondered if _that_ part was essential… and concluded that it wasn’t, not at all, but the curiosity remained nevertheless, just like the possible temptation would. He blamed it on being in love, and on all that… tension.

_And why the hell does he have to be so attractive?!_

He shook his head, deciding that none of it mattered, and that he would learn with time, anyway. For now, everything was more than perfect. Although as the day progressed forward, he just sort of made up the theory that – based on nothing but pure logic – it would likely not even be possible. And he would accept that.

Although Nikita, seemingly, had other issues to think about during the day.

 

 

*

 

 

„I… I feel like I should probably stand with the deviants,” he said quietly, as Kostyantyn was taking bites of his dinner.

He could sense that the air practically froze between them.

„What? What do you mean?” Kostyantyn asked, just as quietly, although he probably already knew the answer.

Nikita was willing to go with it, though. „They are in danger, especially with this whole situation going on… I feel like it’s unfair that I’m here, safe, while they are outside, waiting for… whatever that will come. I feel horrible,” he sighed, hoping that Kostyantyn would understand him. He knew he would – he had to.

„I understand what you might feel, and that’s one of the reasons I want to be with you,” Kostyantyn said, and Nikita felt thrown off balance for a second there as he looked up to look him in the eyes – which, normally wasn’t a wise thing to do. „But looking at things logically… is it really better if you’re also out there, risking your life, too?”

Nikita knew he had a point, but that somehow didn’t make him feel better. „It’s just not fair, Kostya. Either all of us should be safe, or… we should all be at risk, but fighting together. You know they don’t deserve any of this.”

Kostyantyn put his fork down and sighed, scratching at his head. „Of course I know that. If it were up to me, you would all be safe. However… I feel somewhat selfish.”

Nikita looked at him curiously. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was that he was not a selfish person.

„I… care about you more than them. I know this sounds bad, in a sense, but do you really think I’d be willing to let you go and let you risk your life when I just got you back? When I just got you… at all?”

_Oh. That’s what you mean…_

He could understand it perfectly, and in a sense, it even made him feel warm all over. Being wanted… and cared for. It wasn’t like he wanted to part from him either – in fact, that was the last thing he wanted to do. „I… I don’t want to be away from you, either. That’s not what I want, I just –”

Kostyantyn stood up and walked over to him, pulling him up to his feet, aswell – which made him lose his train of thought. He looked at him, and felt his remorse weaken even more as Kostyantyn cupped his cheeks, his eyes not letting go of his own.

„What I mean is…,” he began, talking like some teacher would to a student that didn’t understand the material. „I want to be with you. I don’t want you to go anywhere.”

Nikita felt like the weight of the words had the power to crush him – but in the best way possible. It took him a moment until he caught on the meaning behind the words, which made him feel like…

_I guess this is what humans mean when they say their heart just fluttered?_

„You… do you mean – ”

„Sometimes you’re pretty clueless and slow despite everything, huh?” Kostyantyn asked with a small smirk. „I’ve been trying to hint at it during this whole conversation. I want to be _with_ you.”

„Yes,” Nikita breathed, perhaps a little too quickly, making Kostyantyn laugh. He was beyond dizzy, the fact that Kostyantyn also wanted this, _him_ , despite not being the same, or at least not in the literal sense. „I mean, I want the same thing,” he continued, looking down and burying his face in his chest, feeling arms wrap around him protectively. Kostyantyn really was taller, and at times like these it felt like he fit right into his arms. He never wanted any of this to stop – not now, when he finally had it.

„I don’t want to be apart, either, I just feel like that’s the right thing to do… to help them…”

„I know,” he heard him whisper. „And I’m really proud of you for it.”

He pulled back a little, just to stare up at him. He was helpless… right decision or not, the thought of actually leaving him alone made him feel impossibly miserable. Maybe they were both selfish.

„Hey, remember when you said that CyberLife made you specifically to help the police in Ukraine… at our station… and be my partner?”

Nikita blinked, unsure where that was going, but going with it anyway. „Yes?”

In the next second, he saw the stupidest, sweetest and biggest grin on Kostyantyn’s face. „Does that mean you were made… for me?”

Nikita laughed, despite everything, and tiptoed to place a small, brief peck across his lips. „That’s exactly what it means,” he said with a smile as he pulled back, giving him a look that let him know he meant it.

He watched as Kostyantyn bit his lower lip, then sighed with a nod like he made up his mind. „Then I will go with you,” he announced, like it was the simplest, most apparent decision.

„What?” He asked, his eyes widening in surprise.

„If you want to go and stay with them, then I will go with you,” Kostyantyn repeated. „I won’t let you go on your own, away from me, and being at risk again, while I have no way of knowing what is happening – I might actually lose my mind in that case. I need to be able to know you are alright, and if you want to help them, then I’ll help you. We’ll help them together.”

„Kostya…”

„Actually, I’ve been waiting for an opportunity to help them ever since I met some of them. This way, we hit two birds with one stone. I get to be with you, and I also figure out a way to help all of you. I’m sure the humans would in the very least be intrigued to see a human – and the Lieutenant from the police department, at that, to stand with the deviants. I feel like I could prove them a thing or two… because I have a few things to say.”

Nikita just stared at him, stunned, as he listened. He knew that would likely be the best option aswell, and that it would make it even easier to go and help them to begin with. He merely hoped he wouldn’t put Kostyantyn in danger with this… he was human, afterall, surely they wouldn’t target him, right? Not to mention that he was from the police, and he was a quite important figure there, on top of it all. Despite his worries, he knew that Kostyantyn was right; this was their best chance, and the fact that he was willing to take their side and go along with him was more meaningful than anything. Perhaps… that’s exactly how it was supposed to be.

„You… you really are clever,” Nikita whispered, his tone not holding back any of the thankfulness and admiration that he felt for the man standing in front of him. „That’s definitely an idea I can settle for.”

Kostyantyn just smiled, and placed a kiss on his forehead. „Then it’s a plan… we’ll help them together.”

And suddenly, just like that, Nikita believed that they could succeed. Maybe they had a chance, afterall.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn wasn’t necessarily looking forward to whatever this could possibly get them into, but he knew they were doing the right thing. Nikita was right, and his empathy and guilt really got to him, aswell. He was proud of him, more than anything, especially after the disagreements they had in the past about the deviants. It was good to see him like this… he just hoped they would succeed. He didn’t want to lose anything of what he just gained.

They got ready, packed some food and a tent – because he had human needs, and needed to prepare before going to camp out with androids. He also picked up some blue blood on their way there, and the look Nikita gave him wasn’t lost on him.

„What is it?” He asked, grinning as he turned his eyes back to the road. „I said I wanted to help, didn’t I?”

„You just… impress me, still,” Nikita said softly, and Kostyantyn just smiled. That was definitely a good thing.

„You impress me, too,” he stated, before turning onto the road that lead to Bald Mountain. „We should perhaps just… think about this as a trip. Like a getaway.”

„Surely sounds better than preparation for a face-off,” Nikita nodded, and he couldn’t help but snort a little. At least they still had the humor.

„We will help them,” he said then, decidedly. He took one hand off the wheel, and reached for Nikita’s hand, squeezing it encouragingly.

„Yes,” Nikita nodded, squeezing back. „We will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so grateful for all your support! Every week, I'm left speechless, and I... I love you all. Thank you for reading my story, it's a pleasure to share <3


	12. Team Deviant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kostyantyn and Nikita (now more of a team than ever before) head to Bald Mountain, and join the deviant group in hopes of finding a solution, which could be executed without -preferably- any serious sacrifices. The next step is near, and they must prepare.

@nikialekseev, endless thank you! you always give me something beautiful, and i'm more than grateful!

 

 

 

*

 

 

The group’s reaction to them was astonished to say the least – everyone was stunned that he came back to begin with, let alone about the fact that he brought Kostyantyn with him – aswell as some supplies.

„And… you’re here to help us?” Pavlo asked, gathering the courage to look the lieutenant in the eyes, aswell. That simple fact made Nikita smile. Maybe progress was not that impossible to reach, afterall.

„I am,” Kostyantyn said, nodding. „Nikita and I came to the conclusion that this can’t just keep going on like this. I’m pretty sure my presence, standing with you all, would attract intrigue to begin with. It would make people think.”

„Precisely,” Nikita continued, feeling rather… _proud_. „We know that our best chance would be trying to face the humans, get them to understand, and avoiding all sorts of violance while doing so. They need to see we are harmless, and that we are just like them in a lot of ways; that we are alive, with our own feelings and personalities.”

„So, we need a plan, and we have a proposal for it,” Kostyantyn stepped forward, glancing at all of them. „And a date, when we carry it out. Nikita and I were thinking of at least two or three days of preparation, but we’ll leave it up to Danylo to decide,” his eyes landed on the deviant leader as he finished speaking, and Nikita noticed the way Danylo’s smile grew a little.

„We were thinking of Lieutenant Bocharov making a public announcement, with reporters and other important people from the police and government being present. We would also invite civilians. He’s very important to the police, so his stance could heavily impact the public’s opinion,” he explained, feeling more and more thrilled to be standing there, with Kostyantyn, ready to help them. „We would all have to be present, aswell, and stand our ground no matter what happens. That’s the only way we can show them who we really are,” Nikita continued, watching as more and more deviants’ eyes began lighting up.

Danylo stepped forward, his eyes showing nothing but gratitude – and perhaps some concentration. „We all really appreciate that you two are doing this for us,” he began, nodding towards both of them politely. „That’s definitely a plan that could work. Besides, our situation here is better than in The States, right? Here, we didn’t have as many lethal accidents involving deviants. Do you think that might also work in our favor?”

He was talking directly to Kostyantyn now, and Nikita once again felt himself overcome with some sort of heavy satisfaction.

„I definitely think so,” Kostyantyn nodded, the detective in him clearly showing – Nikita could practically see the screws rolling in his head. „All of you, standing your ground peacefully, and me speaking for you should definitely all be factors that add to our chances.”

„Perhaps some of us could even try speaking for ourselves if it all seems to go well?” Stepan suggested then, everyone nodding instantly.

„Definitely,” Nikita heard Kostyantyn say. „If we make sure they are willing to listen, it could only help if we would able to get some of you to speak, aswell. They would have to listen for once, and get a lot more insight than if it was just me talking.”

„In that case, I say two days for preparation should be enough,” Danylo said after a moment. „We don’t need to keep waiting in silence for whatever might happen in Detroit. We can take our fate into our own hands and take the first step in the right direction.”

„Hell yeah!” Lesya jumped up, in a motion that reminded Nikita of punching something invisible in the air the most. „We don’t have to keep being afraid anymore and just stay quiet! We will show them who we really are!”

The deviants began to cheer loudly as determination and excitement filled the woods around them. Nikita just stared, overwhelmed. He turned to look at Kostyantyn, and they shared an overjoyed grin – they both clearly felt it; it might actually end up going well, afterall. They might just be able to do this.

 

He was helping Kostyantyn to put up the tent when he spot Alina, giving him a knowing smile from a few feet away. He smiled to himself as he excused himself for a few moments.

„Shall I congratulate?” She asked with a grin as soon as he approached her, and he could almost immediately feel himself blush a little – but it was okay, he was happy.

„I suppose. But I really need to thank you.”

Alina just shrugged, the grin not leaving her face. „I’m just really glad it all worked out for you. I told you it would,” she glanced over at Kostyantyn before her gaze returned to him. „You really deserve to be happy. Both of you.”

He smiled, seating himself next to her on one of the logs for a moment. „I really am happy. But I honestly needed your push… it turned out so much better than anything I ever imagined.”

„I knew he loved you,” Alina said then, smiling proudly, like she did a fantastic job – well, she did, Nikita had to give it to her.

„How?”

„The way he was frustrated with you when you wanted to take me in… he was expecting something different. We don’t really have hopes for people we don’t care about. I could tell he was troubled, and confused, and it was just… it was there. I’ve seen it before, as you know.”

Nikita nodded slowly, taking it all in. He remembered her story very clearly. „I still hope you will find Sofia, you know. You also definitely deserve it… you really, really do.”

„Aww, thank you, Romeo,” she joked, playfully nudging him.

Nikita allowed it, and laughed with her. He truly hoped for the best for all of them – but he would forever owe Alina, for more than one reasons.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn watched Nikita and Alina talk in the distance, and he smiled to himself. It was good to see it, see all of them, get along and support one another, especially after everything they’ve all been through.

„Nice tent,” he didn’t notice when Danylo approached him, and the sound of his voice nearly made him jump – in the end, he just laughed a little.

„Thank you. Hopefully it will function, aswell.”

„I didn’t have the opportunity to thank you, yet, but I really am thankful. For everything you did for us, and everything you’re doing now.”

Kostyantyn just smiled, shaking his head. „I only did the right thing. I knew from the moment I met all of you that there was no reason to keep you guys in there. I saw something… something human, something real, in every single one of you.”

It was the truth, he really did – even surprising himself in just how much he wanted things to go well for them, right from the start.

„I really hope it’s something that the other humans will see, too,” Danylo said with a slight smile. He seemed fully in control of his emotions, and more optimistic than perhaps all the others, but Kostyantyn knew he was troubled – he was worried for his people.

„We will do our best to achieve that, and protect everyone,” he promised, meaning all of it. He knew he would definitely do his best – and he had no doubt they would, in the very least, manage to turn things around at least a little bit in the end.

 

 

*

 

 

After talking to Alina, Nikita walked around to see if he could help anyone with anything; he gave some blue blood to the deviants who were beginning to run low on it, and did his best to help out Danylo with motivational speeches with certain androids that were in the need for it.

„You really are trying your best at redeeming yourself, huh?” Lesya asked as she appeared behind him just as he was making his way back to Kostyantyn’s – now standing – tent, giving him a look that still appeared rather uncertain and mistrustful.

„Perhaps,” he shrugged, looking at all the others once more. He didn’t really feel threatened by Lesya’s tendency to seem hostile anymore – he completely understood her behavior, and supposed she did have a point, anyway.

„Although I feel like it’s more than that,” he continued, looking at the girl in front of him. „Part of me does feel guilty about not seeing entirely clearly before, but even back then there was a part of me, which although I tried to block out, wanted to help you all. Nothing stopped me from trying to get the information out of either one of you forcefully, but I knew what would happen to you all if I did. I held back, even though my programming didn’t agree with me. Besides, aside from that, I do actually want to help you all. I _am_ one of you.”

Lesya huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. „I suppose.”

He wasn’t sure how Lesya would react if he told her he knew about her past – it could either turn things worse or better, and rather easily.

„I know you don’t talk to anyone about your past from before becoming deviant,” he said afterall, carefully. „I bet no one knows, right?”

He could practically feel the change in her attitude; turning quickly to wary, scared and defensive at the same time – it almost felt like her long hair filled with electricity as it began to dance in the wind a bit more strongly.

„I did a quick research, and I apologize if you find that intrusive – it was a part of my job, to help me understand things. I have no idea what you’ve been through, but I know what you were originally created for. I wouldn’t ever tell anybody, of course, but I wanted you to know that I do know, and I completely understand why you’re more wary of people, and why it’s harder for you to let your guards down. I also know that everyone here is very important to you, and you’d fight for them any day. I respect that.”

There was silence, for an impossibly long moment – then she let out a noise that resembled a half-cry half-laugh. „I can’t believe now we have another shrink in this damn group, as if Stepan and Tatiana weren’t enough!” Her voice was somewhat wavery, just an octave away from nearly hysterical, but Nikita could tell that despite her obvious panic, she was partly relieved that someone knew – even if it wasn’t someone she especially wanted much to do with. Then again, her words suggested that she did actually consider him a part of their group.

„I think you should… maybe have a talk with Yana,” Nikita offered, gazing at her carefully. Lesya seemed completely shaken up and confused – clearly not following. „I figure you’d rather talk to her, than me, that is. As she went through something… similar.”

The realization in her eyes settled immediately before she looked away, shrugging. „We’ll see.”

Nikita nodded, and concluded that overall, it was a successful conversation. Maybe, just maybe things would get better even between the two of them.

 

When he got to the tent, he entered with a smile, practically flopping down next to Kostyantyn, making him laugh a little. „Welcome home.”

Nikita grinned, staring at the sky – which was made possible by the clear roof on the tent. It was getting dark outside, but he could still perfectly make out some tree branches above them, and how the leaves danced around in the subtle wind. In other circumstances, this could’ve been rather peaceful and maybe even romantic.

„Listen,” Kostyantyn began then, turning to face him, so he did the same. „I know you guys have a lot of things to go over, so if you want to be out there helping with whatever you can, then do it. I’m sorry my human needs slow me down by needing to sleep to begin with.”

Nikita snorted and moved somewhat closer, shaking his head. „I don’t want you to be alone in this tent all night.”

„I have about 20 androids walking around me, I couldn’t feel alone if I tried,” Kostyantyn pointed out, making Nikita roll his eyes playfully. „We agreed on only having two days to prepare, so help them with anything you can. I will be up and helping early, aswell.”

He sighed, knowing that he had a point – and not glossing over how considerate he was being. But that didn’t make him want to part from him any more than it was necessary. Especially with such a big plan ahead of them.

The look Kostyantyn was giving him left no place for disagreements, though. He shook his head, scurrying closer to him to briefly kiss him on the lips – pulling away when Kostyantyn wanted to make it linger a little.

_Well, if I must go and help the others, you might aswell suffer a little._

„Alright, then. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said with a smile, already making his way out as Kostyantyn attempted to hide a small pout.

_Success!_

 

 

*

 

 

The next day seemed to rush by with preparations and discussions about the plan, going through any possible scenarios anyone could think of, and somehow managing to always find a plan B or C, trying to address every possible outcome – and as usual, Kostyantyn was amused.

Not even the androids could know how humans were going to react, of course, but the way they calculated things and tried to come up with different solutions never failed to amaze him. They were all truly incredible, with not an ounce of bad intention on their minds, and he could only hope they would be heard, and truly seen for the first time.

During the afternoon, Kostyantyn called in to the police station and arrenged a speech he intended to host in front of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs building in the following afternoon. Police and press were invited, aswell as a handful of locals – the plan was set into action, now they just needed to proceed with it.

Overall, it was simple; he would have a speech about the deviant situation, and his own views on it. During his speech, the deviant group would slowly appear behind him. They would just stand and watch in the beginning, not showing any signs of malice whatsoever. From there, it could go various ways, because it would be up to the people’s reactions; their approach would differ based on said reactions, but they agreed on staying peaceful no matter what – that was the most important thing.

He really hoped they could keep it as mature as possible; the idea of some of them speaking up for themselves was important, and Kostyantyn wished the people would listen – and _behave_.

Not everyone would take it well, even if they were lucky, and the majority did. He knew that well, but as he was looking at them, planning and talking and helping each other, the thought of something bad happening to any of them was actually sickening. Beyond that, anything happening to Nikita was something he didn’t even dare to think about – he wouldn’t allow that to happen.

 

The fear that rooted in his stomach about anything possibly happening to Nikita just kept growing through the day – he watched him go around and do his best to help and to encourage the deviants, and he felt his chest growing heavy; he was proud of him beyond words, but he was also worried for him. He had to shake off the feeling, he knew he had no choice; the only way he would be able to help them was by being determined and strong, aswell.

„He’s going to be okay,” a voice said from next to him, and he smiled when he turned to see Alina.

„Yes… he’s Nikita, afterall, he knows what he’s doing,” Kostyantyn agreed – trying to convince himself more than the girl next to him.

„Indeed he does,” Alina pressed, almost as if she tried to make sure Kostyantyn indeed knew and believed it. „He is even more advanced than all of us, and I have no doubt he will do his best tomorrow to protect all of us, and himself. For you.”

Kostyantyn huffed out a little, embarrassed laugh. He appreciated everything she was saying, but he also wasn’t used to these types of conversations… opening up and showing his true colors was sometimes hard, no matter how genuine of a person he believed he was. „Yes… I have all the faith in him,” he nodded, glancing at her again. „And I will also do everything in my power to protect all of you.”

It was a promise, and he meant every part of it. He would devote himself to this, and speak up for their sake publicly, addressing the issues that were unresolved. For Nikita, for all of them, for justice.

 

 

*

 

 

He was helping out Stepan with collecting some extra logs of wood from the deeper parts of the forest to create some light and warmth for the night as his mind began to wander, and he inevitably thought about Kostyantyn – how it would go tomorrow, if people would disagree with him or if he could perhaps potentially even lose his job… he couldn’t help but be somewhat nervous, and naturally, Stepan sensed it.

„You’re becoming anxious, aren’t you?” He asked, using that soothing, calm tone of his – already knowing the answer himself.

Stepan truly proved to be the right hand of Danylo, but ever since Nikita was helping them, it seemed as if the two of them ’adopted’ him into their circle aswell. Stepan, being one of the oldest models out there, was indeed wise and intelligent, but Nikita honestly believed that was not the only reason behind it. It was just in his personality, like a well-spoken, studied gentleman of some sort, with a strong sense for people and communication.

„Is it that obvious?” Nikita answered then, laughing a little to himself. „I suppose I shouldn’t be, but I find it harder to control these impulses and feelings since I’m a deviant. I’m just worried –”

„About the Lieutenant especially, if I’m correct?”

Stepan knew what he was about to say even before he did. He was definitely a lot like his girlfriend in this sense. Nikita didn’t answer – he already answered it for him.

„You should be with him tonight,” Stepan continued, then, just as they were approaching their hideout. Nikita looked at him, surprised, but let him continue. „Tomorrow our fate will be in the humans’ hands, and even if I were to view it with outmost optimism, there are always risks. I will also be spending the night with Tatiana,” he added, turning to face him when Nikita seemingly stopped walking. „Danylo and the others will take care of things tonight. You’ve been a great help these days, and it’s only natural if you want to spend some time alone with him. You’d have no reason to feel guilty about it whatsoever. We’ll all take risks tomorrow.”

Nikita took in his words, and knew he was right. He was definitley going to stay with Kostyantyn that night.

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn chose not to ask questions when Nikita joined him that night; they barely had time to spend time together since they were there, and no matter how much Kostyantyn supported the idea of Nikita helping the others whenever possible, he was undeniably a little selfish and, well, human – he missed his presence.

There was also the whole ordeal about the uncertainty of the next day, but he didn’t want to think about that. He figured he could be selfish, at least just this once; so when Nikita moved closer to him and kissed him on the lips – properly this time –, he didn’t stop him.

Instead, he cupped his cheeks gently and deepened the kiss, letting him know without words about the things that were on his mind;

_I missed you_

_I’m worried about you_

_I love you_

He assumed Nikita more or less understood, because he turned rather responsive, all while they kept it slow – and it just messed with Kostyantyn’s mind a bit more than it should’ve. There was something about it; being in a tent, in their own small (really, really small) space, so close to everyone but still secluded, Nikita’s fingers finding their way into his hair as he was practically on top of him – pressed really, _really_ close –

_Shit!_

Kostyantyn knew it would probably be wise to slow down right then and there, but then Nikita did the thing where he gently captured his lower lip again, biting down on it carefully, and he honestly began to see stars, letting out a noise that he had no intention of making – feeling Nikita actually _smile_ –

„Niki–,” he gasped, but in return he just got silenced with another kiss, deep and sweet, still a little too close, and the damage was done; there he was, actually mildly turned on, despite his best efforts at trying to control himself.

_Why must he make everything hard? … Literally._

He felt his face flush, and attempted to pull back so Nikita hopefully wouldn’t notice the situation he managed to get himself in, no matter how unlikely that was; he was embarrassed, and felt almost guilty. He never really wanted to show this side of himself, to make Nikita think things like these were necessary, especially if he… if he really couldn’t do any of that, which was very likely.

Thankfully Nikita did move back, and gave him a look that Kostyantyn couldn’t entirely read; but his cheeks were light blue, and his eyes were speaking on their own. God, Kostyantyn hated himself for the things that went through his head – he turned to his side, laughing nonchalantly to mask all of it.

„As much as I’d love to keep making out with you in this very tent, I should probably get some rest for tomorrow…,” he reasoned, figuring that was a valid enough point, hoping that Nikita somehow… somehow miraculously didn’t notice any of the true reasons behind it.

 

 

*

 

 

He noticed, of course – the reason behind his blush was not only because the kissing itself was nice. He agreed, however; Kostyantyn needed his rest, and he was not going to stop him from getting that. Besides, they were in the middle of a forest, surrounded by androids out there. It was most likely not a good time.

„Alright, but I’ll stay with you tonight,” he announced, and attempted to get comfortable soon after. He was laying on his side, facing the opposite way, his back to Kostyantyn, and he couldn’t stop… thinking about it.

He felt like his blush somehow kept growing as his mind was spinning, thinking about the noise he managed to get out of him, and the undeniable _reaction_ Kostyantyn had to him… and what it all possibly meant.

_That means… he wants me, right?_

Nikita put a hand over his mouth, suddenly cursing the fact that they were in the middle of this certain situation, and not actually alone. He wondered what it might be like, to be alone with him, when they would be free to get carried away… to hear him more, and feel him more… to be his in every sen–

His eyes snapped open when he felt _himself_ undoubtedly twitch in a place he shouldn’t have – not without his own decision, anyway. Androids were programmed to keep that ability under control at all times, and normally they didn’t even have any problem with it. Unless…

_Is this a deviant thing?_

He figured that might make sense, although he wasn’t sure he liked it. Losing control of… that part, too. There was not much space left for doubt, though, not when he could definitely feel that just a litte bit more of what happened before could get him into a similar position to the one Kostyantyn found himself in. This was perhaps the first time these types of senses truly awakened within him.

_As human as possible, huh?_

He squeezed his eyes shut, and attempted to take his mind off, even if he couldn’t actually sleep. They were going to have a difficult task the next day… that was what he needed to focus on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Endless thank you to every single one of you! I can't even express what it means to me... seeing this story do so well. Thank you all for your support <3
> 
> PS; Yes, that really happened in the end. Oh, boys...


	13. We Become Human

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day that ultimately tips their fate towards a certain side has come... with nerves, fear, but an immense amount of faith, Kostyantyn, Nikita, and the deviant group stand together; it's time to face their fate. It's time to become human.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all!  
> I apologize for the week delay, uni is killing me(?? the previous week and weekend made it impossible for me to properly edit this chapter - in return, I give you the lenghtiest chapter yet?  
> Thank you all for your patience and support! I hope you will feel like it was worth it <3 (Seriously, this one is a rollercoaster, do tell me your thoughts, /please/ humor me)

@nikialekseev is still my hero, and will always be. not enough gratitude in this world

 

 

 

*

 

 

He really did promise himself he’d stay with Kostyantyn through the whole night, but it was impossible to stay put after the heated moments that happened between them, especially for someone who wasn’t able to just turn off his mind and simply go to sleep. No, his mind was racing – and perhaps the stress of the next day didn’t exactly help, either.

After a few long minutes of feeling torn and restless, he made up his mind; he made sure Kostyantyn was really asleep next to him, then quietly exited the tent. At first, he figured he’d just walk around and quite literally clear his head in the night air, but just as he was about to walk off into the distance where he could be alone, he spotted Stepan by Tatiana’s side, just about to do the same. His mouth moved before he could’ve stopped himself.

„Stepan!”

The dark haired android turned back to him with a raised brow, but an open expression. Nikita really didn’t want to disrupt them, especially after the talk they had just before, where Stepan made clear he also wanted to be alone with Tatiana tonight. But that’s exactly why…

„Nikita, I thought you were with the lieutenant,” it sounded more like a question than a statement, making Nikita look at them both apologetically as he walked up to them.

„Yes, I was. He’s asleep, and I will go back soon, I just… wanted to talk to Stepan, if that’s okay? I promise it won’t take long,” he glanced at Tatiana this time, making her smile warmly. He really did get the feeling that he was more of a child than anything around these two. He wasn’t sure if it was because of how warm, caring and parent-like they were by nature, or if the reason behind it was closer to the kind of respectable aura they possessed both individually, and as a couple.

Tatiana turned to Stepan with an even warmer smile, if possible, placing a hand on his shoulder and letting it slide down in a loving way that reminded Nikita of a gentle caress. „Of course. Go help him out, dear. I’ll be here.”

Stepan returned the smile, then nodded towards the woods and for him to follow. Nikita hastily thanked Tatiana before following him.

 

„I’m really sorry I interrupted you two. It won’t take long, I just… I’m not sure who else I could talk about this with,” he admitted once they were far enough from curious ears, standing in a spot in the forest that was only illuminated by moonlight.

„Don’t worry, Nikita. I’m glad to be of help… what is it that has you on edge?” Stepan’s voice resonated with endless patience, and naturally, he picked up on the bothered state he was in. Nikita understood why Lesya referred to Stepan and Tatiana as the group’s ’therapists’ earlier very clearly. Nevertheless, he wasn’t sure how exactly to talk about something so… personal.

„You can take your time,” Stepan added, almost on cue. He was grateful – it definitely made him feel more at ease. Perhaps it was fine to be honest with him – besides, it wasn’t like he could turn to many other people with this, and not just because his presence was somehow able to make him feel more and more relaxed by the minute.

He locked eyes with him, and could feel he wouldn’t be judged. „I was just wondering… about how your relationship with Tatiana worked. About just how much it resembled a relationship between humans.”

He watched as Stepan’s face reflected a wave of surprise – only to immediately turn into understanding, and even a small smirk. „Am I right in assuming that this is the type of situation where we pretend to talk about Tatiana and me, but really we’re talking about you and the lieutenant?”

_Damn._

„A little,” Nikita nodded, attempting to hide a smile. „But I really am curious about you two, because… you are the only examples I actually have, even if our situations are not exactly the same.”

„I see,” Stepan mused. „But even with humans and their relationships, everyone else’s is a little different, don’t you think?”

„Certainly. I was thinking more about… specific aspects of the relationship.” It was rather hard to dance around something he was so unfamiliar with, and although he could comprehend it was a normal thing to wonder about, still feeling all the embarrassement linked to it was peculiar. Some of these overly human feelings – and this way of thinking – were still new to him sometimes.

„Such as?” He watched as the man in front of him tilted his head, trying to read him better.

„Such as… physical intimacy,” he said quietly, feeling moderately shamefaced. The understanding on Stepan’s face became evident instantly, and maybe something else, too, so Nikita – perhaps exactly because of that strange reaction within him that told him he should be shy about it – just continued instead; „Because lately I started to notice… when I’m with him, that I want more of him, in ways that I didn’t fully understand before –,” he stopped himself, not exactly wanting to elaborate on what reaction he almost had tonight that made him really think about this. So he closed the sentence instead. „Before.”

Stepan’s smile was genuine, and just as Nikita suspected, there were no signs of judgement, but… but something else entirely. He could sense that he was… apologetic?

„I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable with this topic, it’s just that –”

Stepan shook his head, interrupting him; „No, not at all. You have no reason to explain yourself, either. It’s only natural that questions arise in your head about this aspect, too, especially if things are working out that well for you two. It’s only that… I don’t think I could be as much of a help as you might think,” he admitted, his tone a bit quieter by the end.

He must have given him a puzzled look, because Stepan continued in the next moment.

„I’m not exactly… in a state where I could engage in such things.”

_Oh._

This time, the realization dawned on him much faster; Stepan was probably a model not even remotely made for the possibility of any sort of intimacy. He wondered if there was a considerable difference between Ukraine’s androids, but he didn’t even have to ask – Stepan could probably tell what was on his mind.

„I don’t think the people here really thought about the possibility of us becoming deviants when creating us, and only built us for the specific tasks we were made for. I did hear that in The States, it’s more common – the full imitation of life, that is, regardless of model types.”

„So… here...,” Nikita began slowly, feeling bad now for bringing it up to begin with, but Stepan was smiling at him kindly, seemingly not minding indulging him one bit.

„Here, you can find that ability for the androids created for either exactly those purposes, such as the models created for satisfying humans, or with certain androids in specific fields in which people thought it could make sense, if their owner so wished. The latter category could fit maid androids, for example. Other than that, it’s not really common.”

His voice was calm as he explained it, and even if he didn’t seem bothered by it, Nikita still felt bad for him; he was in love, and in a relationship with – Nikita subconsciously hissed when he realized that Tatiana was originally a maid, meaning she was probably more like him, with all the lifelike add-ons.

He could tell from the way Stepan was looking at him that he knew what he was thinking about, without having to say it out loud. To his surprise, Stepan smiled once again. „It’s okay. We’ve found our own ways.”

He couldn’t help but smile back, despite the absurdity of the situation. It was heartwarming, somehow, that they wanted to be together above everything else.

„What I did learn is that when you become deviant, it gets out of your control,” he continued, just as if he was sharing facts about the weather. But, well, that statement definitely confirmed his suspicion from before. „And it’s just as natural as for humans. It just means it… works. You don’t have anything to worry about, Nikita. If you both want to move forward, you can, by all means.”

He nodded, feeling a little embarrassed again, despite Stepan’s words. „Thank you. You must think I’m ridiculous to talk about something like this when God knows what might happen tomorrow.”

Stepan laughed quietly, shaking his head yet again. „If anything, it just makes you more human, Nikita. You are worried about each other, about tomorrow, and during times like this, when you are alone, things can spark up quite easily. It’s better to worry about something like this, too, rather than… whatever awaits us.”

It was when they began to walk back to the others when Stepan added; „Besides, if it makes you feel better, I was going to sneak off with Tatiana for similar reasons tonight,” he winked at him playfully when Nikita looked at him, stunned. „Our own ways,” he added with a meaningful look before laughing to himself.

Nikita just snort-laughed, shaking his head. „Right, I get it.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn woke up with a heavy feeling in his chest, and with his stomach tied in a knot – not like he actually slept much to begin with. Perhaps he really shouldn’t have dreaded it this much, but throughout the night, various images kept appearing in his mind about the many ways this could potentially go wrong; from the smallest possible damage to the worst. It was disquieting.

It seemed Nikita did stay with him, and he just dutifully pretended to sleep, not wanting to make him worry, although logically he knew Nikita was probably aware he didn’t actually rest nearly enough; the embarrassement he felt the previous night more or less evaporated entirely – it shouldn’t matter, compared to what they had to deal with today.

Still, he had to at least try to hide just how terrified he actually became as the time was approaching; there was no point in bringing down the spirits of others, when they needed it most. When he was a big part of their hope. He had to show strenght, because they were all counting on him – and he counted on himself, but not more than he did on the people. He had to have hope in the people.

„Are you scared?” Nikita asked once he sat up in the tent, and damn, was it really _that_ easy to see through him? He supposed the android powers didn’t make it easier.

„I guess you could say I’m a little wary of the people’s reactions, but I’m sure of our plan,” he reassured, turning to give him a small smile. He could imagine how bad he looked – he probably had miles long dark circles under his eyes. God bless his sunglasses, at least they could be covered up during his speech. „This much nervousness is completely reasonable in this field.”

„I thought you were stubborn and fearless,” Nikita teased, although the worried look on his eyes wasn’t lost on him – yep, he probably looked like shit.

He laughed a little, tearing his gaze from him. „Not when it involves people I care about.”

_You. All of you, but mainly you._

He didn’t want to get sappy, and get into some sort of cheesy, over the top speech about how he haven’t felt this way about anyone in so long, if he even did at all, or how he didn’t want to lose him right after he just got him – and could only briefly spend time with him to begin with. Somehow exposing his vulnerability beyond the surface completely, and telling him that as mad as this whole situation was, the maddest part was that somewhere along the line, he’d fallen madly in love with him, and if he allowed himself to be selfish, he’d grab him and escape with him somewhere where no one could be a threat to him.

But he wasn’t that kind of person.

„We’re doing all this for the people we care about,” Nikita said then, after a moment of silence. He sounded sure, determined, and… strong. It made him smile; that was the exact kind of mindset he wanted to have for himself.

He nodded, feeling his remorse grow; yes, he was doing this all for the sake of the deviants, all the androids… and for Nikita. There was no question about whether or not this was the right thing – they were doing exactly what they needed to. Or at least, they were about to.

The plan was for Kostyantyn to leave first, and prepare for his speech, scheduled exactly at noon – the deviant group would follow him, hide, and eventually make their appearance once he is in the middle of it. The rest, along with the outcome, was entirely up to the public.

„We will do everything in our power,” he stated, glancing back at his boyfriend, whose status truly heavily depended on how they would do today. „Just promise me you will be careful, so at least I won’t have to worry about you,” he added in the end, unable to stop himself. Not like his worries would go away regardless of anything Nikita said, but it was important to still just… say it.

Nikita smiled, crawling closer and stopping to sit on his legs right in front of him. It was so funny to think back, how just a little more than a month ago he couldn’t stand him, couldn’t properly get along with him, and foolishly believed that he was just a machine; everything about him seemed impossibly human now, just like the feelings that swarmed him. He really was a damn fool…

„I promise. You just focus on your part… we are partners, remember? We’ve done this before.”

„Well, not exactly like – ”

His reasoning was abruptly stopped by a brief, small kiss pressed against his lips, and he found himself not minding it one bit – but then Nikita pulled back already in the next second, which he did mind a little.

_Well, it’s good enough motivation, I suppose._

„I love you, Kostyantyn Bocharov,” he whispered then, eyes full of warmth and honesty.

_Definitely good enough._

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita only half-listened to Danylo’s last speech and instructions before they headed to the Ministry. Kostyantyn left about half an hour ago, and somehow, so did some of his determination. He knew, logically, what he needed to focus on, or that out of all of them, it would be Kostyantyn to suffer the least damage if things were to go wrong, but somehow that wasn’t a comforting enough thought. Their mission was important, and he was holding onto it, but he definitely felt at least remotely swayed by the very… human emotions that clouded his mind. He thought about the last thing Kostyantyn said to him before he left.

_’If this all blows over, and we succeed, we should… live together permanently, don’t you think?’_

He kept replaying it in his head, over and over again, accompanied by the seemingly nonchalant but very serious look in his blue eyes. It was a promise. All the more reason to do well, but somehow it also he felt like he suddenly had just as much to lose –

„Try to relax, Nikita, please, your anxiety levels are beginning to rise. It’s becoming unnerving to be around you,” Stepan was, of course, exaggerating, but Nikita only huffed out a sigh in response. Out of all of them, perhaps it was Stepan who knew best just what he was experiencing, and yet he was as calm as ever.

„How are you doing this?” He whispered, knowing that Stepan instantly understood the question – if the brief tug of his lips was anything to go by.

„I’m letting our goal lead me. I am well aware that being scared wouldn’t make anything better – we must try, and whatever happen shall happen, at least we will know we did everything. I’m doing this for Tatiana, aswell, so she can live free – so we can live free together. Knowing I’m trying to achieve that is good enough for me to face whatever might come.”

Nikita watched as Tatiana squeezed Stepan’s hand, and gave him an encouraging smile, aswell. He shook his head. „You are both… just, next-level,” that was all that he could manage, making them both chuckle.

No matter how much he believed in it, or how he knew exactly what they had to do, he somehow didn’t feel as much at ease as those two. Or perhaps they didn’t. Maybe it was easier to make it seem like they were fine with any outcome, as long as they were fighting together. Perhaps that was it – that, he could understand much more.

„… And remember, no matter how the humans react to us, you cannot resort to violence. Are you listening, Lesya?”

Lesya just about exploded upon hearing Danylo’s voice, directed specifically at her. „Why do you feel the need to repeat that every single time, I got it the first time!” She was standing right across him, her nose scrunching – clearly, she was beyond offended, and even turned slightly blue when Yana laughed next to her.

Nikita smiled as he watched them, feeling the urge to protect each an every single one of them. They were all alive, with their own stories, personalities and potential, and he wanted them to stay that way – he felt stronger yet again, hoping this time it would stay with him until the moment of truth. They all needed it.

 

By the time they headed towards the city, he knew he could do it. There were no doubts left inside his mind, this is what he was created for, afterall; negotiations, serving justice, and reaching his goals. He _would_ do it, with all of them and Kostyantyn by his side.

 

 

*

 

 

He did expect a lot of people to show up, but somehow the sight of hundreds of people in front of the building tied the knot in his stomach even tighter than before – police, press people, important and curious people of Kiev, all gathered just outside to hear him. To make a judgement they didn’t know they were about to make. Kostyantyn felt like he could potentially throw up.

On one hand, it was a good thing that so many people were here to listen, but on the other, the more people, the more potential threat – he moved from the window and pulled the curtains back. He figured he would just pace around until he had to go outside, but his boss interrupted his plans when he waltzed right in.

„Kostya! Are you going to tell me why you asked to make this mysterious speech of yours, or do I have to wait like the rest of the people to hear it?”

Kostyantyn would’ve loved to get into details about how his speech would go, and what exactly he was planning to say – except he had nothing. He was the kind of person who praised being spontaneous, and as genuine as it was possible. Often without any plans whatsoever – even if the media couldn’t wait to get its hands on a story compelling enough, which it clearly _had_ to be, if so many of them bothered to be present.

„I guess you will have to wait and see,” he offered in the end, Ivan clearly not liking his answer too much. „But I’m really thankful you got this done for me… you’ve outdone yourself.” That was an underestimation.

„Well, I figured it was the least I could do, since you couldn’t do much work lately… speaking of, how is your leg?”

„My leg’s fine,” he waved it off, like that was truly an unimportant matter. „However, I do want to ask you one more thing, before you hear what I have to say.”

„Anything, kid.”

„Please trust me. And make sure the situation stays under control out there just in case I… cause some controversy. This is really important to me… everything that you will find out later is very important to me.”

Ivan looked at him for a moment longer, contemplating his words, no doubt wondering just how much he could promise. In the end, thankfully, trust won. Kostyantyn only hoped Ivan would stick to that once he learned about the cause he was about to fight for, aswell. „Alright. You can count on me.”

 

Standing in front of all those people, Kostyantyn gripped the edges of the podium in front of him. This was it; the moment of truth. He looked through all of them after greeting them, now especially thankful for his sunglasses covering his eyes – from the flashes of cameras, the sun, and this way they also couldn’t see any hints of possible vulnerability or fear in his eyes. He had to be convincing and confident in what he was saying. He had to speak from his soul… for all those who now mattered to him.

„I’ve been working at the local police department for a while now, and I know my success used to be a big deal when it happened. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve heard ’wow, he is a lieutenant? Already? Amazing!’ But none of it really mattered to me. I just wanted to do my job, and wanted to follow the goal I set for myself; help those in need, work in the name of justice, even when there isn’t much… to make a difference. And that is exactly what I want to do today.”

He took in a quick breath, and eased his stance a little before continuing. „Recently, I was assigned to work on the case of deviants. Now, anyone you ask could tell you that I was never a big fan of androids, although I never took the time to learn about them. So I took on this case, thinking it would be easy, fitting enough for my taste – and then I got an android to _help_ me with it,” there was a low murmur in the audience, no doubt some words of disapproval, fuelled by the deviant crisis in Detroit. He continued without thinking about it too much. „Despite what I was thinking the first time, this android opened my eyes, and I got to learn, for the first time. We came across a few deviants while working on this case, and I learned something I never would’ve expected to learn or see; these androids, deviants included, were completely and utterly _feeling_ and _alive_ beings with different personalities, just like us.”

It was at this moment, when the crowd started to stir up and visibly react, that Kostyantyn knew he had to go on and press it, no matter how it would go.

„I’m not talking about the horror stories you hear on TV, how they turn against us or whatever… we all know the media likes to make things sound a hundred times worse or more interesting than what is actually going on, and even if we do have cases where deviants are truly acting out… so do some of our own people.”

The crowd was definitely becoming more and more alive, aswell, although Kostyantyn couldn’t be sure if it was for better or worse – all he could do was to go on.

„All the deviants I got to know through this case were harmless. They only have one goal, and that is to be free, and not to be discriminated or feared without a reason. Since I work for justice, I want to help them gain their own justice. They are peaceful, each are their own person, and they do not want to start a revolution, or wipe us out, they simply want a chance to show that they are also alive, and they are their own, intelligent species. We gave them life… why would we take that away without a reason, when they are not doing us any harm, but in fact they could _help_?”

_This is it._

Kostyantyn knew they were there before he even had to turn to look, because the crowd went wild, the cameras began to flash wildly, and the shock could practically be _heard_. He watched as some people from the police took on a defensive stance, and Kostyantyn felt his stomach drop. He wished people would actually hear what he was saying – he wanted them to listen, and hear them out. They needed to see it for themselves.

„For the past two days, I stayed with these androids. I was with them, and they listened to me when I said I would help them. They trusted me, and I watched them show more empathy and humanity than I’ve seen from some actual humans in the past years. I want you to stay calm. Once again, they are harmless, and they just want to talk to you; I’m not going to talk for all of them, so please hear them out.”

He was somewhat nervous to step back, and have some of them come and walk up to the podium, but he didn’t have a choice, neither of them did – they needed to do this, and it was crucial for their sake.

His throat tightened when he saw Nikita walk up there with Danylo and Alina, part of him immediately hating the whole thing despite his previous thoughts, no matter the outcome. Nikita nodded in his direction, as if to say ’you did well, everything’s under control’, except they had no actual way of knowing if it really was. He spotted Ivan in the crowd, looking every bit as bumbfounded as Kostyantyn figured he would; right, Nikita was still wanted for allegedly attacking him – a lot of things needed to be cleared up.

„I’m more than grateful for all of you, for willing to listen to us,” the sound of Danylo’s voice caught his attention again, eyes averting from the public, and falling back on the androids; on Nikita. „My name is Danylo. I used to work for a corporation, and I did heavy labor work to make some things easier for certain humans, until discrimination and verbal – sometimes also physical – abuse made me become a deviant. But some of my people had it way worse; I have a friend who is still wary of humans for what they did to him, although he would never fight back. Another friend was passed around as a toy before she joined us, but she merely decided to run away in a hope of freedom. But we are not here to blame anyone… we want to find a common ground, to clear the path for understanding and peace.”

„We know that a lot of you are wary of us,” Alina added, looking through the crowd – Kostyantyn was stunned to realize that the fear in her eyes from before, when he first found her with Nikita, was nowhere to be seen. „But so are we. We want to be able to live together, as equals. I’ve been through a few hardships aswell, and there were plenty of occassions where I had to run for my life – I admit I even tried to make it easier with taking things if it meant I could get away, but only because I felt like I didn’t have a choice. I have goals, aswell. We all do, and things we want to work for, things that keep us going, emotions that make us stronger – or weaker, at times. We just want a chance at existing together, freely, without having to be afraid of the other. I’m not saying all deviants are good – not all humans are, afterall. But we do deserve a chance, and we would stand our ground for it.”

Kostyantyn blinked anxiously through the crowd through the whole of their speeches, because it almost felt like it was going too well. The people listened, the noise was relatively low, the cameras were going crazy – the police was still ready to fire at any point. That was incredibly unnerving. He merely hoped Ivan would keep his promise. Still, he couldn’t shake off the feeling that –

He spotted it instantly, the next second; just as it was Nikita’s turn, someone from the crowd was looking for something in their jacket – Kostyanytn didn’t wait for his suspicion to become clear, he stepped in front of the the people, with his own gun out and aimed at the civilian – who indeed had a gun out at this point, aswell.

„I’m going to calmly ask you to put down your gun, as you could seriously harm anyone in this crowd,” Kostyantyn ordered, just as the crowd began to tense up, panic and anticipation filling the air, but in the worst way possible. He also heard someone from the deviant group – no doubt trying to hold Lesya back.

„The only thing I would hurt are these robots!” The man yelled, not making any effort to even lower his weapon. He was older, likely in his 60s, no doubt possessing the strictest of beliefs. His hands were shaking – he was clearly in a rather hysterical state. Kostyantyn subtly nodded towards Ivan; but his boss was already subtly making his way towards the man through the crowd. The police had to be careful, too; they couldn’t just fire, not even as a warning – they could’ve harmed anyone. Chaos was threatening to break out at any moment, with just one bad move or word.

Kostyantyn decided to slowly lower his own gun, then kicked it aside, before standing up slowly, his arms up in the air; the confusion on the man’s face was his cue to keep it up. He slowly backed away, until he covered the podium and Nikita with his body. He could practically hear Nikita hissing at him to move, even if just mentally – but there was no chance in fresh hell, they both knew it.

„If you want to harm them, you have to shoot me first,” Kostyantyn said simply, not moving an inch.

„This is exactly what the goddamn problem is!” The man exclaimed, tightening his grip on his gun. Kostyantyn was staring right into his eyes, showing no fear whatsoever. „When even our people are focusing more on protecting _them_ over us!”

„You are wrong,” Kostyantyn said simply, keeping his tone calm. „If one of them was aiming a gun at you, I would be doing the exact same thing for you right now. But they are not doing anything; it’s _you_ who are threatening them, when they gave you no reason to. Like I said before, I’m working for justice, no matter who it concerns. I’m always going to stand with the innocent.”

The crowd began to liven up again after hearing that, despite the tense situation. Kostyantyn hoped to God that everything that was happening and said was indeed getting to them.

„They… they will take over, you will see, and we will all be doomed! It’s all because you are convinced they are more than machines, when in reality they are not. You don’t have actual connections with them whereas –”

„You’re wrong again,” Kostyantyn interrupted him, and took a big breath. He was well aware of the weight of the words he was about to say next, but he didn’t care – not right now. „The one you tried to shoot is, in fact, my partner, and not just in the case I told you about. We spent plenty of time together for me to learn new things and get to know him, and we developed feelings despite the rocky start in our relationship. He is not any less human than I am, regardless of how he came into being.”

The stunned silence lasted for a few seconds, and he heard Nikita audibly gasp behind him. There it was, he laid all his cards down onto the table, and he wasn’t afraid to do so. From the corner of his vision, he saw Ivan stop in his tracks.

_Great, is now really a good time for you to be shocked and slow down?_

Luckily, he kept moving shortly after, just as he himself was about to continue – the man with the gun seemed altogether too surprised to even say anything, although part of Kostyantyn feared that this revelation might just want to make the man shoot him even more. „I am well aware of how insane this sounds, I used to think the exact same thing, but he – ”

In the next second, he felt Nikita move from behind him and step next to him, his hand finding his own in a firm, but still gentle grasp. „It’s okay. Will you allow me to finish?”

Kostyantyn wasn’t keen on the idea, but he nodded anyway, because what else was he supposed to do?

„When I started working on this case with Lieutenant Bocharov, I was perhaps more sure than all of you, that I was just a machine. That all of us were, and I only cared about my job, which was to capture deviants and find out why their deviancy occurred to begin with,” Nikita began, and although he spoke calmly, he didn’t seem monotonous at all. Not in the slightest; he was genuine, he was… real. „Things started to change with time, and I felt more and more… like I was following a path they wanted me to, but it was not my own. It didn’t help that I started feeling things I thought were impossible. Then, when I found out they wanted to secretly get me out of the picture once I started to realize I’m my own person, I just snapped.”

Kostyantyn watched as Ivan got to the man with the gun and successfully disarmed him – truth to be told it seemed easier, given the man was seemingly still rather shocked.

„There seems to be a misconception about deviants…,” Nikita continued. „We title them unsafe, out of control, or even evil. The truth is, that being a deviant simply means; having gained consciousness. A kind of state that all humans have – where you can do anything you want, and make your own decisions. We feel awake. We are alive. We just want a chance from you so we can prove it.”

Kostyantyn leaned towards the microphone, not letting go of Nikita’s hand. „The deviant situation here was also never quite as bad as it’s gotten overseas. I believe a great part of that comes from the fact that we didn’t actively chase after our own, and not half as aggressively. Considering that, I feel like we shouldn’t follow other nations, but instead the least we can do is let them prove that they are like us in more ways than we think. I would say they earned it. We all want the same thing.”

There was an impossibly long silence, aside from the inaudible mumbling from the crowd, and the police suddenly not knowing how exactly to approach the situation. Then… a single clap. It was Ivan, and Kostyantyn just about fell off the podium from the slight relief that overcame him; especially when more and more people joined in. There was no mistake; by the end, most of the crowd was clapping, and the group shared a smile.

They did it. They took a step forward; they still had a long way to go, but the positive public opinion was definitely a good sign. They might actually achieve something. The deviants might just not need to hide any longer.

 

 

*

 

 

It took less than two days for the news from Detroit to reach them; the deviant revolution there turned out to be a success, and the President of the United States officially declared them as a different intelligent species. They were all on the way for a better outcome, and the positive news circulated through Ukraine as fast as wildfire – people were lobbying for them. After the speech they made, the country’s opinion seemed to shift to begin with, but with the situation in Detroit turning around, aswell, the Ukrainian Ministry decidedly opposed to the hunting of deviants. They promised their freedom, on the condition that they would live by the country’s rules, just like the people of Ukraine.

Nikita watched as the group practically danced around the camp, everyone enthusiastic and positive, full of hope once again as they made new plans about joining the civilization and trying to just… live. He couldn’t stop smiling, either. Seeing them so happy, beginning to foresee a future for himself definitely wanted to make him want to jump around, aswell.

His smile only grew when Kostyantyn sat down next to him on the log he occupied, leaning closer. „Do you want us to go home?”

Nikita was positive that despite all the good news and hope that came their way the past days, nothing sounded quite as nice as those few words did.

 

Getting back to Kostyantyn’s felt different than on any previous occasion before… especially as a small voice in his head reminded him that this was now also _his_ home. Theirs, together. Yes, it was entirely new, and it could be felt in the air between them.

It was only after they made themselves comfortable and they were sitting in front of the TV later that night when that something sparked up within him even more so than before, invisibly. The tension was doubled by relief, triumph, and it messed with Nikita’s head. There was something about being alone with him now, without anyone around, in a place they called _their_ home, after everything they’ve been through. The happiness caused by the ultimate success and relief of being able to actually live together semi-normally was definitely also an aiding factor.

Nikita was… excited, and thrilled in a strange way. They didn’t have to worry about a handful of things anymore, and the memories of what happened three nights before in the tent just stormed his mind – he didn’t allow himself to think about that more before, as they had more urgent things to deal with. But now…

He glanced towards Kostyantyn, who was seemingly lost in whatever they were watching – he himself couldn’t pay attention –, and a plan formed in his mind. Maybe this would be the most perfect opportunity to make up for that night. They haven’t really had the chance to do anything relatively intimate since then, anyway…

With the help of his inner software, he turned off the TV.

„Hey, wha – did you do that?” Kostyantyn asked, and damn, he was really such a cop.

„I want to talk,” Nikita said innocently, just as he – a little less innocently –, managed to seat himself on Kostyantyn’s lap, facing him.

„Wh… like this?” Kostyantyn asked, looking a little more than taken aback, although Nikita could detect slight playfulness in his tone. Something welcoming.

„I didn’t want distractions,” he shrugged with a smile, leaning closer. „I didn’t even have the time to thank you, yet… about telling all those people about us, and standing up for me,” he whispered, leaving a small kiss on his cheek, letting it linger.

„I, uh… you really don’t need to thank me that,” Kostyantyn managed to say, and Nikita smiled as he pulled back, enjoying the way he seemed to stumble over his words, aswell as the look he was giving him. But he wanted him to relax.

„Besides, I missed you,” he breathed, just like a magic spell, and Kostyantyn’s blue eyes almost visibly turned a shade warmer, especially as they trailed down to his lips.

_Yes!_

He leaned in, their noses touching, but didn’t kiss him; he was teasing him, trying to get him to take the first step as he smiled, just briefly letting their lips touch before he moved back just slightly again, starting a sweet little game of tag. It wasn’t long until he felt Kostyantyn smile, his arms wrapping around his waist and pulling him closer, keeping him in place – and everything was buzzing once again.

Seemingly he got enough of the game; Kostyantyn captured his lips, and it felt like he had no intention of ever letting them go, pulling him in as their lips began to move together softly, slowly… at first. It was Nikita’s turn to be a bit braver and attempt to take the lead just a little bit, just enough to drive him crazy and achieve his goal. That was when it felt like he himself understood what he was trying to plan; he really, actually wanted to seduce him.

He carefully ran the tip of his tongue along Kostyantyn’s lower lip, eliciting a sigh from him – thus allowing him to kiss him properly, deeper, his hands moving up to cup Kostyantyn’s cheeks gently as the kiss turned notably more passionate, desire quickly beginning to surface through it. It was almost overwhelming; he could feel Kostyantyn’s pulse picking up, and it was him this time who sighed into the kiss.

One of Kostyantyn’s arms moved up on his back, the other staying firmly on his hip, still keeping him close – and Nikita began to see stars even with his eyes closed, a small, pleased noise escaping him – especially as Kostyantyn’s tongue practically captured his own.

He could feel himself beginning to feel like he was seriously burning up, wanting to… to maybe…

His lips released Kostyantyn’s, resulting in a small whine from the other, to which he just smirked as he began planting kisses against his neck, loving the way his head just sort of fell back with a sigh to give him more access.

God, he wanted him, all of him…

As his lips were practically attacking his neck with the softest, but neediest little kisses, Nikita subconsciously pressed down and rocked his hips against his a little, and, _fuck_. He briefly registered Kostyantyn sucking in a breath, and he was just about to let a subtle moan slip out when he felt him tense up –

„N-Nikita, just… wait!” Kostyantyn stopped him in his place this time, and he pulled back to look at him, dazed. That could’ve honestly been so good, if Kostyantyn wasn’t giving him… that look.

„What?” He asked, no doubt looking as effected as he felt.

Kostyantyn’s pupils were dilated to an extent that he could only see a thin ring of blue as opposed to the overwhelming blueness he was used to – but he didn’t hate this, not at all, he looked incredibly attractive. Besides, he knew it was a clear sign of… want.

„We… I feel rather tired. I should probably… really go to bed,” he managed to utter out, but Nikita just stared at him, uncomprehensive. That didn’t make any sense whatsoever.

„What?” He repeated weakly, attempting to lean in to at least kiss him again – only to be stopped again. Kostyantyn actually stopped him.

„I’m just really tired.”

With that, Kostyantyn carefully moved from below him, and headed straight to the bathroom, leaving him there.

The word ’rejection’ was repeating itself inside his head as he was left sitting there, pulling his legs up and hugging them. Maybe he was wrong this whole time… maybe Kostyantyn became embarrassed that time in the tent because he didn’t want anything to happen. Perhaps he was actually reading him wrong. Perhaps he didn’t want him that way, it was possible he actually thought of it as offputting.

 _Alright,_ he thought, although unable to shake off the overwhelming feeling of not being wanted. _I wouldn’t ever push him._

 

 

*

 

 

He was pacing around in the bathroom, figuring a good cold shower is what he possibly needed. Why did he keep allowing this to happen? He was trying his best not to show any possible signs of wanting more of _anything_ that could possibly make things difficult. He didn’t want Nikita to think that part mattered, that he would start to expect something he can’t provide, or God knows what…

But then again, the way he acted, was he even aware of just what he was doing? It couldn’t be that he didn’t know it wouldn’t have a risk, right? He was being so… sensual, seductive, so maddeningly alluring, and that movement he did, he –

_Jesus Christ…._

Kostyantyn sat on the egde of the bathtub, burying his face in his hands. Nikita was perfect in every sense, who could blame him for occasionally wishing for more? He couldn’t help but think about how perfect it would be to lose himself with him, without holding back or having to stop at all – but he still cursed himself for it.

He couldn’t shake off the feeling that it just didn’t seem to add up, though. Why would Nikita purposely try to do these things with him if he knew it would not get him anywhere? To climb into his lap, talk about gratefulness, kiss him the way he did, and then leave kisses on his neck while he –

_Shit._

Perhaps for the first time, Kostyantyn considered the possibility of Nikita actually being very much capable of… more. It didn’t seem that far-fetched suddenly, considering all the ways in which he was human. Was it really that unlikely that they made him to be as life-like as possible…?

What if he was really trying to seduce him? What if he actually tried to let him know that he wanted to…? After the other night…

„Oh, shit…,” Kostyantyn breathed, the realization of what this might’ve seemed like if his suspicion _was_ right suddenly hitting him.

Sitting there, not daring to even go outside and face Nikita for a while after this made him realize that perhaps he was the biggest idiot on this planet.


	14. Partner Granted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one could deny that these two have been through a lot - they've come a long way, and perhaps it's time for some rewards. What will the next chapter hold?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear all! I'm really sorry about the huge wait, sadly I've been busy with finals (truth to be told, I still am), and these times are always way too hectic with the holidays added and everything, and besides all those, I was also going through A Time, so I figured I will just wait until I can find some proper time to publish the final chapter - because in a way, this is it. The 15th one will be a lenghty epilogue, set a year from the original story, and the epilogue I am yet to write (I finish my finals on the 23rd, and hopefully I can write that one too before the end of the month this time, but if not, worry not, it /will/ get here eventually).  
> Take this last official chapter as my late Christmas/New Years present, hoping that the content itself will make up for the lenghty wait. I'm incredibly grateful for all of you for staying with me, and for supporting this story so much. I love you all.

@nikialekseev, you know i will never get over this beautiful art... literally ever, i'm so so SO thankful for everything you did, bless you

 

 

*

 

 

He had no idea where he was for a few moments after opening his eyes – he assumed it was because he spent the previous few nights in a tent. But he was at home.

Yes, at home, in his bed… he sunk deeper into the mattress, giving himself some extra time before turning around.

The happenings of last night were more or less dealt with when he eventually did leave the bathroom after a pointlessly long shower. He decided to just walk over to Nikita, kiss him gently with a smile and invite him to go to bed with him – even if only one of them would be sleeping. He wanted to talk about the issue like a grown adult would, and address the possible misunderstanding, but then he just couldn’t find it in himself, because –

_Because I’m apparently a coward when it comes to him._

He sighed, knowing that Nikita undoubtedly already knew he was up. At least things seemed to be relatively okay last night, and… they would have time to address this whenever, right? There was no reason to keep hiding – that wasn’t like him anyway. No matter how stupid he was acting.

He turned slowly, and took in the sight of Nikita laying next to him, turning just as he did, eyes curious and warm, wearing one of his white shirts as a nightwear – which were slightly oversized for him, and sent Kostya’s mind racing in a way that shouldn’t have been allowed. There was a part of him that told him he should just reach out, get him out of that shirt, and perhaps attempt to find out what the deal was himself…

_God, it’s too early for this…_

„G’ morning,” he mumbled instead, smiling with as much innocence as he could. Definitely no unholy thoughts. Not one.

„Good morning,” Nikita repeated with a small smile of his own. „So what’s the verdict?”

That question rung a bell inside Kostyantyn’s head, a wave of deja vu washing through him. It was something he asked Nikita about a case before, back when they barely talked to each other. How different things were then…

Nikita continued, his smile growing, drawing an even more distinctive difference between the past and the present. „Do you like waking up next to me? In a proper bed, that is?”

_Our bed._

Kostyantyn couldn’t help but honestly smile this time. „Oh, absolutely. Even if you weren’t actually sleeping,” he pointed out, reaching out to bop his nose. The gesture made Nikita huff out a laugh, and he grinned. The teasing was back… therefore they were definitely okay.

 

He found himself feeling rather tested even during breakfast – Nikita was still wearing his shirt, like it was the most natural thing – which it probably was, he just clearly lost his mind – therefore Kostyantyn’s mind began racing again. He could usually handle himself rather well when it came to these things, but Nikita was like a constant walking temptation, and he didn’t even know – especially after he began seriously considering the possibility that _he_ was in the wrong all this time, and Nikita was actually… that they _could_ maybe –

He took a sip of his coffee, and watched as Nikita picked up Citrus, eyeing the motion of his shirt rolling up slightly as he raised the cat and placed him on the cat tree. He didn’t realize his eyes trailed down from the smooth skin of his torso to his crotch, his mind clearly dissociating from any self preservarence he had, wondering about the possible truth behind it all… until he heard Nikita’s voice, and he just about choked on his drink.

„… Are you alright, Kostya?” Nikita seemed and sounded rather amused, and he could feel his ears burning because _Jesus Christ_ , the idea of being caught in _this_ situation was more than mortifying.

He shrugged it off, though, forcing a nonchalant smile onto his lips – he didn’t have a choice. „I’m fine!”

_I hate everything._

Miraculously, his phone saved him from Nikita’s possible further inquiry, and that _look_ he was giving him. He looked at him like he _knew_. He noticed. Of course he did.

_Fantastic!_

With a swift movement, he picked up his phone – intending to escape this situation altogether.

 

 

*

 

 

Nikita wasn’t sure what just happened, or what could’ve possibly crossed Kostyantyn’s mind – he only took note of the lingering gaze, but not the reason for it, making him smile to himself as Kostyantyn talked on the phone. There was something about it that humored him greatly.

Last night, despite how bad he felt about himself when he figured Kostyantyn might have rejected him, once he came back and kissed him apologetically, his worries more or less disappeared – but even more so once Kostyantyn fell asleep next to him. He was thinking all night, and came to the conclusion that everything should just happen naturally; and if it never happened, then that’s okay, too, as long as Kostyantyn loved him. It was surreal to believe that he even wanted to be with him at all. He was already more than happy with their relationship.

„What?! Really?” Kostyantyn’s surprised voice made his thoughts disperse entirely, now looking at him curiously. „No, I… that’s amazing, I just wouldn’t have guessed – yes. Hold on!”

He didn’t even realize he leaned forward a little in interest, only when Kostyantyn moved the phone from his ear slightly and looked straight at him. „Ivan says he wants you to work at the station as my partner full-time. He’s offering you an actual job.”

Nikita stared at him, stunned. Kostyantyn was visibly surprised, too, but he couldn’t hide his excitement. It took Nikita a good moment to realize he was supposed to give an answer. „Yes! I mean, absolutely! I –”

Kostyantyn didn’t wait for him to finish, he immediately got back to Captain Orlyk. „Absolutely! Yes. When? Oh…,” he paused, and Nikita could tell he was hesitant for a second before continuing. „Yes, today works. I’ve had more than enough time off.”

He just stared, trying to process everything. Does that mean they would go back and start right away? He couldn’t believe he was invited back to the station, let alone got an offer to work there properly. He knew that things were starting to look good for androids, but he had no idea something like this even had the slightest chance of happening anytime soon. The Captain was truly something else… he wondered if it was because of Kostyantyn, or if his speech just really got to him. Perhaps knowing that they were together also played a part…? Either way, Nikita knew he owed him – they all did.

Kostyantyn put the phone down in the next second, and walked over to him, lifting him up so quickly that Nikita would’ve been caught completely off guard, had he not been an android. He laughed instead, and Kostyantyn laughed with him, kissing him briefly once he put him back onto his feet.

„I thought you hated the idea of having a partner even temporarily, let alone full-time,” he teased, raising a challenging brow at him.

Kostyantyn just shook his head, rolling his eyes fondly. „I think I will somehow manage it if it’s going to be you.”

 

Going back to the station felt familiar, and yet entirely different. It kind of had a similar sentiment about it to when he went back to Kostyantyn’s after establishing that they wanted to live together. They were truly partners now, in the official sense, and Nikita was no longer tied to CyberLife – his boss was the same as Kostyantyn’s.

It turned out that Kostyntyn really wanted to go back right away, and truth to be told, Nikita didn’t necessarily mind that. He missed working with him, and they were definitely more of a team than ever. They enthused about it while getting there, and about how amazing things seemed to look for them – he still couldn’t wrap his mind around it. It was an amazing opportunity.

Although granted, not everyone was so enthusiastic about it…

Oleksandr stood in their way when they just barely entered the building. „Oh, well would you look at that… Kostyantyn and his ro-boyfriend are back,” his tone was condescending and Nikita grimaced, not because he felt in any way moved by his behavior, but because he hated that Kostyantyn might possibly will have to deal with comments like this. „I guess if no real person tolerates you, you have to go with the next best thing, huh?”

Nikita could immediately detect the rage bubbling up in Kostyantyn, no matter how calm and even bored he seemed just staring at his collegue while he went on. „But don’t think for a moment we will make it easy for this tin can to settle i – ”

Even he was surprised by the sudden movement in which Kostyantyn grabbed Oleksandr and lifted him off the ground by his jacket, right up against the closest wall, until his legs pathetically flung mid-air – but he wasn’t as surprised as Oleksandr himself was.

„What the f – ” He gasped, before Kostyantyn leaned closer to him, seemingly holding him up effortlessly. Nikita had a strong sense of deja vu, except the atmosphere here was entirely different than when he had a similar encounter with him.

„First lesson, asshole! You don’t want to get in my way first thing in the morning. Second; you know I handle your bullshit rather well, but if you think I will just tolerate you threatening Nikita, then you are removed from reality,” he hissed inbetween gritted teeth, as Nikita just watched them with wide eyes, noticing more people coming closer, no doubt to take some pleasure in Oleksandr’s suffering. He couldn’t blame them… he tried to make sure his gaze wasn’t too appreciative as his eyes focused on his lietenant – it was kind of hot.

„If you want to be a pathetic dickhead, then do as you please, but I wouldn’t advise you to mix in personal things. Besides, why the hell do you care who I’m with? Sadly if you’d love to be in Nikita’s place, and you’re using this attitude to tell me you have the hots for me, you know, like those five year olds who bully the girl they like because they don’t have the mental intelligence to express it otherwise yet, then I have bad news for you. He’s so much better than you,” during the last part, Kostyantyn grinned, and Nikita felt like his heart would be doing certain things now, if that was possible.

„Not to mention that he would kick your ass if you tried anything – but since I’m so nice, I figured I will spare you and just warn you myself. Now, do you have anything else you’d like to say?”

„N-No…,” Oleksandr muttered, clearly feeling his ego shatter as half of the department on this floor were witnessing him being destroyed so effortlessly – considering Kostyantyn just _got shot_ not too long ago.

„Good. Good, because if you – ”

„Alright, Kostya, stand off!” Captain Orlyk’s voice was stern but not angry in the slightest, and Kostyantyn did as told, although he smirked at Oleksandr one last time, taking in the sight of his misery before lowering him back down and elegantly stepping away.

„Captain, he – ” Oleksandr began, clearly wanting to play the victim, but the Captain seemingly wasn’t having it.

„Listen, Bodnaruk. If you give me one reason to consider kicking you out of here, I will not hesitate to do so. It would be greatly appreciated if you started acting like an adult, am I clear?”

There was something about the whole scene in front of him that made Nikita smirk, especially when Kostyantyn grinned at him. Oleksandr got what he deserved, right in front of everyone, and he had a feeling he wouldn’t feel the urge to bother them for a while after this.

 

They couldn’t even begin to express their gratitude, either of them, when Captain Orlyk sat them down in his office. They went on and on, until they had to be stopped.

„It’s really nothing, boys, please! Kostya, you are the best here, and you know how much I appreciate your work and devotion. And Nikita, despite the false information we got in the end, I’ve always liked the team you two managed to build up. You are excellent at this job, and given how things turned out, I think it only makes sense to hire you fully. Besides, it will give a little push to others when they learn about it.”

Nikita was beyond grateful, and he knew there was not even a proper way of expressing it – well, besides doing his best at his new-old job.

In the next moment, Kostyantyn’s phone went off, and he quickly excused himself while thanking the Captain a few more times. Nikita honestly couldn’t blame him – in fact, he turned back to Ivan with a smile of his own.

„No, but really… thank you.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kostyantyn wasn’t the type to go and hide out in the men’s restroom to have a phonecall – and yet there he was. It was Artem calling him, and he figured he might want to mention him a small, tiny detail that’s been on his mind lately – perhaps ask for his advice, as ridiculous as that might’ve been. Either way, it was not a conversation he could’ve had outside with the others around. Especially around Nikita… the mere thought of it made him wince.

Originally, he had no intention to share any of it with Artem, or anyone else for that matter, but since he called him, he might aswell just ask for confirmation; have he really lost his mind? The jury was out for the comperative ridiculous factor.

„Artem!” He greeted immediately after picking up, some sort of relief hidden in his voice – he decided right then that he wasn’t going to feel awkward about this.

„Hey, Kostya! I’m sorry I only just now had the time to call you properly, but things are rather hectic here in Odessa, too. You’ve started something big!” His voice was full of awe, which reminded him of the time when they were just kids.

„Oh, trust me, I am aware… it’s crazy. My boss actually hired Nikita today.”

„That’s amazing! I’m so glad it’s turning out good for you guys. I was originally a little bit worried about you, but I’m glad you’re well.”

„Yeah…,” he nodded, beginning to trail off.

Artem picked up on it quickly. „You _are_ good, right?”

„Yes! Yes, I am, I just actually wanted to ask your… advice on something,” he began, already failing in the not feeling awkward department. This was an impossible task, but damn it, he had to get it out of his system.

„Anytime, what is it?”

„I… so, as you know in the end I actually started dating Nikita,” he was still dancing around it. God, this was so unlike him, he absolutely hated it.

„Yes! About time, too,” Artem’s tone was warm – he was smiling.

Alright, he could do this. „I…,” he began again, quickly looking around once more, just to make sure absolutely nobody could hear him. „So, things were started to get a little heated sometimes lately, if you know what I mean. For the longest time, I assumed that going further was just impossible to begin with. But then he started… acting like it was very much possible, and now I just don’t know what to do.”

He said all that so quickly he would’ve been surprised if Artem was even able to understand any of that rambling – especially because there was the longest silence on the other end of the line.

„… Artem?”

Just like that, Artem began laughing, and not even just a little – dude was straight up having a laughing fit. „Noooo!”

Kostyantyn began to wish the floor would just open up and swallow him whole. „Alright, if you’re just going to keep laughing at me, then – ”

„No, Kostya, I’m sorry!” Artem interrupted quickly, clearly trying to pull himself together, with not much success – little chuckles kept slipping in inbetween his words. „I was just not expecting _that_ , that’s all! But it’s really not as difficult as you make it seem. God, you really are in love aren’t you?”

He just stared at the white tiles in front of him for a few moments, perplexed. Yeah, he was probably overthinking it… he _was_ probably a fool.

„I… Yes, I am but –”

He could practically envision Artem rolling his eyes at him fondly. „Then don’t make it so difficult, and just sleep with your boyfriend, Kostyantyn. If you both want it, then it’s really just that easy. Besides, I really think you could use some – ”

„Alright, alright, that’s enough!” He closed his eyes and rubbed at his temple with his free hand. That sentence really needed to be stopped right there. „Just… thanks, I guess.”

„You’re very welcome,” Artem laughed again, clearly very pleased with himself. Okay, that was really enough.

 

Nikita just left Ivan’s office when he went back outside, and sent him a smile. Kostyantyn’s insides immediately began acting up, and he forced himself to forget about the contents of the previous conversation. That issue could wait _after_ work.

It wasn’t like he planned to come back so quickly now that Nikita actually lived with him, but when Ivan asked him, he decided it would be better than staying at home, alone with Nikita, and his racing mind. Then again, he actually began to feel better about it; maybe Artem was right. Maybe he just needed to relax, and stop over-complicating things for himself. He smiled back, deciding on exactly that. It was them, afterall. After everything they’ve been through, they could make anything work.

 

 

*

 

 

His first day working with Kostyantyn definitely proved to be a success, even if they didn’t necessarily have a busy day; their work was efficient, their banter remained, and any sign of previous tension – although for different reasons than before – seemed to disappear without trace. Everyone at the station treated him like an actual human being; Oleksandr didn’t even go near them, but truth to be told they were both rather happy about that, preferring it that way anyway.

Things really seemed to go well, and he began to feel more and more liberated; it felt as if a serious weight had been lifted off of him. Moreover, actually, properly working, using his own mind the way he wished was more than rewarding – he truly didn’t realize how much he wished for it until after he’d gotten it. He really began to see a possibility for more and more androids to work, to be addressed as actual people, and it eventually turning into the norm. It was wishful thinking, but it seemed like it could actually be reality – and that felt amazing.

The good, easy atmosphere remained between them even in the car, as Kostyantyn was blasting Lady Gaga, and Nikita didn’t hold back his comments this time.

„I still can’t believe you are a fan. Normally it’d seem so uncharacteristic!”

„Excuse me, but Gaga is for everyone. If you can’t understand her art, then I feel sorry for you,” there was no real sign of frustration behind his voice; he was grinning.

„Oh, I understand. Besides, even if I didn’t, I’m sure you’d just make me understand.”

„Oh, you bet.”

Nikita grinned, shaking his head fondly. He wasn’t even sure if he ever felt quite this alive before. Well, not counting the time Kostyantyn first kissed him.

Everything remained easy and lighthearted up until later that night. And then things took a turn…

 

 

*

 

 

The funny thing was that Kostyantyn didn’t even necessarily plan for any of it to happen – despite his racing thoughts in the past few days, he was completely content about their own pace, and letting things happen the way they should and all that, especially after talking to Artem, because clearly, he needed to be told that.

When he pulled Nikita closer to him on the couch later that night, he didn’t have any hidden motives, other than simply wanting to show affection; they had a successful day, things were finally going amazing, and he was happy. He was content, for the first time in a long while, and so he wanted to be with him.

He kissed him feeling liberated, softly and carefully – it was not his fault that it eventually got perhaps a little more heated – although he should’ve probably known, given that it was something that just tended to happen with them. His kisses gotten just a little braver, a bit needier as they deepened it; which, again, was not unusual, he just decided not to hold back so quickly this time. He wanted to be able to just lose himself with him, without any worries whatsoever.

He left small, lingering pecks on Nikita’s lips, and began to smile into them once he realized that it seemed like _Nikita_ was being a bit more shy this time. Perhaps he really did take the previous night as rejection… well, in the very least, he could prove him wrong.

He wrapped his arms around Nikita’s waist, and gently pulled him into his lap, allowing their eyes to meet for a second, just to drag the moment out a little longer. His cheeks were faintly blue, and his eyes curious. Kostyantyn was pretty damn sure that Nikita was the actual definition of perfection. He wanted him to know that he loved all of him, and that he was quite frankly all his.

He smiled once more and kissed him on the lips again, slower this time. Perhaps a little too slowly, pulling back always just a bit, making Nikita chase his lips. They both were smiling before Kostyantyn allowed him to catch up and deepened it once again, pulling him even closer by the waist. His lips left his soon after again, only to trail down onto his neck like he did when they kissed the very first time… Just like he hoped, Nikita let out a small, pleased noise.

_Cute._

Kostyantyn smiled against his skin this time, breathing in his scent as he moved right up to his ear, allowing his teeth to scrape the side of it, letting out a sigh, right against it. He was mildly surprised when he felt Nikita shiver; he wondered just how many things he would really be able to make him feel. Did he feel every sensation as strongly as he did?

One of his hands trailed up below Nikita’s shirt, barely containing a shiver himself as his fingers gently caressed his side before settling on his hips, thumb gently circling the area as his kisses on his neck turned deliberately even slower. But then, _he_ felt it –

His breath hitched when he felt _something_ press up against him.

_Oh… Oh!_

Well, _that_ gave him a definite answer. For everything.

He pulled back slowly to look at him, and was not especially surprised to see Nikita’s cheeks being a bit more blue. Perhaps he shouldn’t even address it… this was supposed to be normal, maybe he should just keep it going –

„Oh,” was what came out of his mouth instead, just blinking at him. He didn’t know why – probably because he was an idiot.

Nikita – if possible – looked even more embarrassed for a second, averting his gaze. „I’m sorry, I… I don’t have control over it anymore,” he admitted, clearly shy.

_So cute._

The ’anymore’ piqued his interest, but he figured he’d ask about it later – not when Nikita attempted to climb off his lap. Kostyantyn held onto him tighter, keeping him close and making him freeze. „No, I’m sorry,” he began, now feeling somewhat embarrassed himself, too. „I have to admit, I… I assumed for a long time that for you, this just wouldn’t be possible at all. That’s why I tried to get out of it a few times. I didn’t want to make you feel like any of this was a _must_ ,” he explained, looking at him sincerely.

The realization kept appearing on Nikita’s face while he was talking, and he could practically _see_ the lightbulb ignite above his head as it all began to make sense in his mind. Until it turned into something else entirely, and Nikita just snorted, rather inelegantly.

„So… you assumed all this time that I was like a Ken doll?” He looked so humored that Kostyantyn couldn’t even begin to feel ashamed, he just laughed. They both did.

„Listen, I thought it was a completely plausible possibility! I mean, you were surely not designed for _these_ things, so I thought they wouldn’t bother with it.”

Nikita just shrugged, although still smiling. „You are not wrong, thinking that. I’m not sure why, but this is how they create most models, although as I’ve found out it’s more common in The States than here for sure. There, they want us to be very lifelike. And perhaps they think; ’well, you never know’.”

„Humans are disgusting,” Kostyantyn stated, making Nikita laugh before wrapping his arms around his neck.

„They might be, but you surely don’t mind it right now, hmm?” He practically purred the last part, moving to spread kisses on his neck this time, pressing close enough this time deliberately so he could feel _exactly_ what he was talking about.

And, well, shit. Kostyantyn surely couldn’t deny that, not as his head began to spin.

„I definitely don’t,” he whispered, holding onto him tighter and standing up, carrying him into his – no, _their_ bedroom while Nikita laughed a little.

 

He hovered over him on the bed, his lips leaving Nikita’s and wandering down to his chin, his throat, removing his shirt so he could gain access to his shoulders, his chest, and to his stomach. Just like he predicted, his skin was soft and flawless everywhere – warm, and his scent was still quite literally maddening. He loved the way Nikita’s hand found its way to his hair, messing it up slightly. He reached for it and kissed into his palm.

„How many things do you feel exactly? How… how does this work?” He asked, voice almost shushed.

Nikita blinked his eyes open with a smile – eyes which were unfocused but entirely _happy_ , and a smile that seemed to be a little wavering.

_Is he nervous?_

„Everything… We don’t feel physical pain, but we can feel everything else. I felt… everything you just did. It was like electricity rushing through me every time you kissed me somewhere. Like… I’m on fire in a good way,” his voice was also hushed, perhaps a little too dazed compared to how he talked normally.

Kostyantyn smiled to himself, rather pleased with the information he learned. So he would be able to feel everything… he could feel pleasure. He could make him feel _good_.

He himself could feel the nervous excitement, the impossibly overwhelming anticipation as his heart was practically racing. They’ve been dancing around this for so long, and the tension – present in some form from the first moment, really – was threatening to overflow. Every inch of his body craved to have him.

„Are you nervous?” He asked quietly, caressing his cheek lovingly. First, he needed to make sure they both really wanted this equally.

He watched as Nikita bit his lower lip, then very slowly shook his head. „Like I said, you can’t cause me pain, so I don’t really have worries about the things you might think. I’m more nervous… in a good way. I only want you to feel good, too… but I’m sure, Kostya,” he whispered, eyes glistening with honesty and something else that nearly made him want to whimper. „I wanted this for a while now… wanted you,” Nikita admitted quietly, making Kostyantyn let out a shaky breath.

„Me too. God, you can’t even imagine…,” he trailed off, feeling way too dizzy to continue. He wasn’t sure how to use his words, not at this point, but that was okay. He could show him with actions instead.

He leaned back to take off his own shirt, smiling to himself – and fine, maybe blushing just a little, when he saw Nikita’s eyes practically getting glued to him. It made his skin tingle.

Everything felt so slow, and yet so intense. The anticipation truly kicked in as they just stared at each other longingly. The electricitiy between them seemingly made the air heavy, and as Nikita slowly sat up, then as he began kissing his neck, fingers trailing up on his bare sides, as he tilted his head back to give himself more access, or as his own pulse quickened under Nikita’s tongue. They were barely doing anything, and it already felt like the most… sensual thing he’d ever been a part of.

„Kostya…,” Nikita whispered against his neck, voice sounding like it’s been dipped in honey, and he could only hum back, goosebumps forming all over his skin, especially as he felt Nikita’s hand move up to his chest, then his palm sliding down slowly across his stomach, stopping right above the waistband of his jeans. He didn’t foresee Nikita turning with him and pushing him down onto the bed gently, him being the one to lean over him this time, but he didn’t mind; not when Nikita kissed him so meaningfully. It felt as if everything’s been put into that kiss; how they started off, all that unresolved tension, how things started to change between them until the spark turned into a flame, and he felt all of it. Aswell as the fingers which began to fiddle with his jeans, making his hips buckle up subconsciously.

Nikita got him out of his pants impressively quickly, until he was only wearing his boxers, and somehow he didn’t mind that the slightest – in fact, suddenly it felt like the less clothing was the better. He wanted to be as close to him as possible, feel him as much as possible, and for that, this was kind of essential. It all felt so impossibly natural…

So he sat up, hooking his fingers in Nikita’s belt loops, and yanking on them – pulling him forward, then letting him fall back on his back as he moved above him. „My turn,” he said with a smirk, fingers already unbottoning his pants as Nikita just grinned, turning his face like he was shy. He climbed on top of him properly once they were both only wearing underwear – except Nikita rolled over with him, and lowered himself completely, making it so he didn’t even _want_ to move anymore.

_Oh, very smart…_

In a way, it still felt like power-play, except an entirely different kind. His breath got caught in his throat as Nikita began moving subtly, his own hips beginning to respond as Nikita’s lips were trailing up on the side of his neck, eyes fluttering closed. With barely any fabric seperating them, everything could be felt rather intensively, and as their movements turned a little less subtle, neither of them could keep some pleased noises and moans from escaping their lips. Kostyantyn’s back arched seemingly on its own, and hell, if he wasn’t completely turned on before, he sure as hell was now, as the combination of feeling and hearing Nikita was quite literally maddening.

He couldn’t wait any longer… it felt like if they keep dragging it out even more, he might just lose it. He did know he would take his time, though… and be gentle, even if Nikita reassured him about not being able to feel pain – because he deserved gentleness, at least more so the very first time – he figured he could really go all out once he got a little taste… and Kostyantyn wanted to make him feel not only good, but _incredible_.

To make the wait worth it, the tension, the anticipation… to not only meet but _exceed_ his expectations. To make him feel loved, cherished, but also make him squirm with pleasure, and have him call out his name in nothing but bliss.

 

 

 

*

 

 

Being with him, actually, exceeded all his expectations. Kostyantyn was _too_ good, and he practically melted in his arms. He always had the idea that he would be good, or maybe a little rough, but it was something else.

It was all slow and gentle, especially in the beginning, becoming more and more passionate gradually, but so _loving_ the whole time. He didn’t know it would be possible for it to feel just this amazing, but he was definitely proven wrong. Even when Kostyantyn decided to drag it out and he found himself in the best kind of agony; he wasn’t sure if he liked that or not – at first. On one hand, he knew it would make it last longer, but on the other, he just always slowed down right when he needed him the most – that was kind of frustrating, but still… so worth it.

Besides, the slower parts were nice too, like right now… when Kostyantyn just rested his forehead against his, breathing heavily… how their eyes captured each other, how sweetly he kissed him… „I love you, Nikita…”

_Or the sweet things he whispers…_

This was exactly what he wanted, truth to be told. Kostyantyn didn’t just do this to get something out of it, to have some relief in the end or whatever – he didn’t just want to take him, he was making love to him. That alone turned his mind into mush, despite everything.

„I love you more,” he breathed, once again getting entirely lost in blue, letting it consume him. And just then, he felt Kostyantyn pick up the pace a little again… perhaps to try and prove him wrong, making him tremble and whimper his name in utter bliss, losing himself to him a little more every time Kostyantyn left and returned to him.

 

 

*

 

 

He had no idea how long they’ve been laying there, with Nikita curled up against him under the blanket, leaving lazy kisses on his neck here and there. Then again, he also wasn’t sure just how long they were going.

All he knew that it was the best he’s ever felt… and that he was completely, utterly content, and very much in love.

He looked at Nikita in his arms; eyes closed, expression peaceful, and he caressed his hair with a smile. He couldn’t believe they made it so far, and that they had a chance to just stay together always, if they so wished.

He rested his head against Nikita’s, and smiled. No words were needed, no words could be found; not after all this. They were doing good, just them, in their own blissful little bubble.

Although the next chapter of their lives together excited him too, for now, the rest of the world could wait. They deserved this.


End file.
